We are born in a world where being compared or comparing ourselves is natural. It is inescapable and intractable, it is human nature and we live by it. Some people make this as a basis to move forward, to dream high, and to be better. However, each of us is different, we might perceive it as a motivation but to others, it might be a deterrent.

How about you? Have you experienced being compared? Do you have this habit of comparing yourself? Does it have a good impact on you? Or it has given you depressing feelings? If you are not aware of it and if you are in denial of your perceptions. Then, let us talk about it.

A Never-Ending Saga

Since we were in the stomach of our mother, we have been captive to this culture of comparison. For example, your relatives compare how active the baby kick to their experience. Then you came into the outside world, they measured your height and weight. See, even a baby who does not have any idea what is happening around experienced this culture.

I know it is normal. Yes, it is but how about when the baby turns seven or five years old? They already have their feelings and thinking. Hearing words of comparison from others or worst from a family member can leave a scar on a child that can be brought when she grows up. Moreover, when she became a teenager hearing the same words again can lead to different circumstances that we must avoid. In addition, we did not just hear it in our home. The saga will continue in school and work. Based on my experience I have been compared by my smart cousins who are older than me in school. I just ignored it at that time because I love my cousins and my parents did not let me feel that I am not good enough.

Since I do not work yet, I will share the experience of my Tita. She works in a hotel as a front desk receptionist and her manager keeps on saying that she must try harder to be presentable in front of the customer, just like her co-worker. As I can see my Tita looks neat and pretty with her uniform it is just her co-worker is more cheerful and stagey. Well, she just accepted it and did some adjustments to prevent another word from her manager.

I do also know that those remarks at home, school, or work are just a fraction of the harsh reality of the world because it is — a never-ending saga.

In Our Own Timeline

We can turn a blind eye or be deaf to others' comments about us. We can proceed in our life by seizing those opinions as an opportunity to prove them wrong. However, the most toxic of all comparisons that are difficult to overcome is the one coming from you. The one appearing from your mind, the one coming from your mouth, and the one reaching your heart.

I believe each of us has compared ourselves to others because I am. I am not perfect and I have tons of insecurities. I do also belong to those people who do not want to be left out. Do not judge me. Hahahaha. It takes a lot of mind control to be able to stop comparing myself especially when I saw one of my friends having a new laptop bought with her own money or the other one who went to the beach looking hot. Then, here I am looking unproductive and haggard that made me times more discouraged. I just can say "Sana all" to them with a matching smile but with sad eyes.

As I tell my story, I can tell that the major factor that can trigger our comparison is social media. Seeing people travel, working happily, having a complete family, posting school achievements, eating delectable foods, their new stuff, their body goals or even their relationship goals can make us think that what if I do have those, and when do I will experience them? These questions will keep bugging you from time to time.

As a result, I do not often use any social media platforms as they can harm our mental health. Instead, I focus on myself and the things I am passionate about such as writing some quality content articles and of course, studying to fulfill my dreams. There is this video I watched where she talks about culture comparison and one word that leaves an impact on me is the word, "Alignment".

I think each of us must have this alignment in our life. If we are aligned to our path, we are not bothered by the noise of comparison around us. We will have this mindset where we look ahead to who we want to be and what we want to achieve. Then we walk towards that alignment strongly believing in ourselves that we can attain what we wanted in our own perfect time — our timeline.

A Thief

We can entertain this comparison in our life in moderation. As we can use this for us to learn and to grow. Moreover, do not forget that those people who you wished to be had to go through difficulties to be where or what they are right now. It is their story and you can also create your own extraordinary story. To end this article, I want to share this quote from Theodore Roosevelt, "Comparison is the thief of joy".

Author's Message:

Hello, readers! School is starting to give a lot of works and I am vying for an academic award. But I promise to write twice or once a week. Anyway, thank you for appreciating my work, it means a lot to me. :))