Finding my Ataraxia

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Avatar for carisdaneym2
3 years ago (Last updated: 2 years ago)

The images that represent my temperament.

This kind of realm that has a lot of crusades is not easy to withstand and we cannot tell if we can survive just by trying to survive. We usually do things that can help us to find our inner peace and follow where our hearts lead us to.

As I was saying, the reasons behind the pictures I uploaded are not just a photo to show by everyone and for you to know that is one of my methods to express how I really feel when things are getting rough. Thinking why the world is unfair for some people but how do you know? They might have a lot of money but they also have some struggles in life so I cannot really tell that the world is unfair. You're lucky to have your parents, some are not. You're lucky that you are still alive.

Let me breathe and drink.

Let me write and think.

Let me try to blink.

Find the reason why It's a sink.

I am clouded with my emotion, thinking why do you need to say that in front of many people.

I will write again and again for the reason that I cannot scream it all. She's in pain and I am too.

Sorry for not being a daughter as you wanted me to be. I'm trying, and trying and trying again. It's hard for me and you. I'm emotional and you are too. We're kinda same you know, of course, you're my mom.

This is what happens when you are close-minded and not ready to listen to others. This is making me feel miserable. I'm tired. Tired. Tired. Pain is real.

I'm emotionally, mentally, physically and financially drained.

Let me get some strength to fight against my battle.

This flower reminds me of myself, some may look at you like you're not worth it to live and some will look in repugnance. But hey, do not forget that some people can see how beautiful you are and they didn't look at physical appearance but the beauty you have inside your soul.

I cannot show my love for you with money... I don't have that yet. I will be successful someday, I'm claiming it, can you wait for that to happen?

Aaahhhhh I ignored my studies today, I need to analyse her situation. She really hates us as she revealed. So why bought some gifts for amiga instead of saving it? Why took some loan when you can't afford to pay for it? Why buying unnecessary things when you can save them? I cannot explain it to her because she will gonna say I'm a rude and useless child again. I don't have the money yet, we need to make a plan mom so we can be successful together.

Please hear us. Understand us too. We need you and your understanding. Please cooperate. :(((

You know, you can't solve the problems if you will ignore them and walk away. You can't compare us with others, we are visualizing better for our future. You cannot dictate what we should and shouldn't. We are not perfect daughters and you are not a perfect mother. But we need to understand each other, money is not everything we need. :(((

You can't measure our love with money. It's priceless mom. It's priceless. Stop making me feel terrible. Don't walk away, We have a better plan. Just wait. We're still in the process.

As we accept our good and bad characteristics, as we understand each other and work together. Isn't it beautiful that despite that, we manage to make it wonderful?

Happy happy Mother's Day to you Mom, everyday.

A place like this where I can find my peace of mind. Look above and share the story that I have, why do I have to experience this kind of life. And there is one question in my mind, what's the purpose of my life?

Will continue beyond...

I was tired, then I took a rest... I got tired again then took a rest.. Little did I know, I don't need to rest because what I need is peace. I am living in a peaceful province but not in a peaceful shelter. They admired how it looks like beautiful but the person who captured it was falling into a place that she wanna stay, still looking for ataraxia for a long time yet there is still no progress. Just letting the teardrops fall to lift the heaviness of the burden in her heart. She is tired that doesn't need a rest, she is tired and she wanted some peace in her heart.

Author's Note:

Photos are all mine.

Thank you for reading, God bless!

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3 years ago (Last updated: 2 years ago)

Comments

You seem very diligent with photos and GIF's. May you find your ataraxia.

$ 0.02
3 years ago

I am really not sure why but this line : "I'm emotionally, mentally, physically and financially drained."

This line tugs hard on my heartstrings. The pain I feel is real but I am one of the lucky ones who can swallow it all and keep it all under control within my beating chest.

I just have to say, you are not alone. We are all in this together (starts dancing).

Hang in there bud. Keep blooming.

$ 0.05
3 years ago

I'm sorry for the delayed response. Your comment motivates me to write my thoughts again. Thank you for the wake up call :)

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3 years ago

Wow.. please keep writing. :) never stop writing. Will always take time to read your words and ideas :)

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3 years ago

hello there haha. thank u for the wake up call again lol

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2 years ago

Lol! What on Earth? This was 3 months ago. LOL

Wait? 3 months???!!

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2 years ago

πŸ˜‚πŸ€£ I only have few articles annd just saw this one when I was looking for something πŸ˜‚πŸ˜œ

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2 years ago

Lol. That was a long time ago, hahah

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2 years ago

Is this our first encounter? LolismπŸ˜†

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2 years ago

Hahah I am not sure...

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2 years ago

Hi Im Shyness. newbie here. Money can't buy happiness. Everyone must survive and eveyone can survive

$ 0.02
3 years ago
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3 years ago

Dear.. Your article writing skill Just wow πŸ₯°β£οΈ Thanks for your valuable post πŸ₯°β£οΈ

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3 years ago

What an excellent way of expressing your thoughts! Something that I couldn't do hehe. Anyway keep on writing. I love your photos btw!

$ 0.05
3 years ago

Thank you for the compliment po haha, kahit magulo po yung flow article koπŸ˜…

$ 0.01
3 years ago

Hindi naman siya magulo hehehe. Anyway, keep on writing and studying!

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3 years ago

Thank you for reading po :)

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3 years ago

Napakahusay sana all mahusay mag exprees ng feekings sa oagsusulat haja ako nahihiraoan paπŸ˜‚ Pero nakakrelate aq sayo how i wish na lang na buhay pa si mama para maipadama ko na mahal ko siya ba masuklian kahat ng pagod niya, huli na ang lahat tsaka ko kang narealize na dapat pala naging mabait ako masunuring anak sa kanya tsaka lang pala talaga natin marerealize ang lahat ng ito kapag wala na sila, kaya ikaw intindihin mo na lang siya, mahalin hanggat andiyan pa siya pasasaan bat mauuwi din ang lahat sa isang matiwasay at masayang panilya.

$ 0.05
3 years ago

Awww, sorry to hear that about your mom. Hays sana nga maayos na hehe.

Btw naka spam na comment mo hmmmm

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3 years ago

Huh pano oo ba pag spamπŸ€”ano gagawin ko?

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3 years ago

Ewan ko din 😭😭

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3 years ago

πŸ˜₯πŸ˜₯πŸ˜₯awst pano na den yanπŸ˜₯

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3 years ago

[deleted]

$ 0.02
3 years ago

Wow, thank you If I made u inspired with that. I am not a pro and I don't have any idea about photography πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜…

My advice will always be to try to capture how you see the subject from your own perspective.

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3 years ago

Gosh Carismatic, you are really good with words. I like how you express yourself, you're perfect just the way you are..

her eyes, her eyes Make the stars look like they're not shinin' Her hair, her hair Falls perfectly without her tryin' She's so beautiful and I tell her everyday Yeah, I know, I know When I compliment her, she won't believe me And it's so, it's so Sad to think that she don't see what I see But every time she asks me, "Do I look okay?"

Stay Amazingly beautifulinisismtisism 😚

$ 0.05
3 years ago

Kinanta ko ate parooot🀧🀧🀣🀣🀣 Salamat sa napakamasaganang ayudaaaπŸ€§πŸ€£πŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’š

$ 0.00
3 years ago

Hahaha recording asann

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3 years ago

Required po??? :(

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3 years ago

Yizzz, go na ha hahaha

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3 years ago

Hahahahaha πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ€£

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3 years ago

You sure are a photographer. Keep it up!

$ 0.02
3 years ago

I'm not😢😢😢 But thank you for the compliment πŸ’š

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3 years ago

laban lang bhie. I got you! :))

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3 years ago

Ulweys, naks badgerist😻🀩

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3 years ago

Lolsk kumbaga sa bch volatile pa ean hahshdgd nawawala bumabalik heto na naman

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3 years ago

Hahahaha had oo den haaysπŸ˜ͺπŸ˜ͺπŸ˜ͺ

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3 years ago

Keep up the spirit dear, whatever you do, if it's good for you then keep doing it and don't give up.πŸ˜‡πŸ˜‡πŸ˜‡πŸ˜‡

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3 years ago

Of course, thank you so much yudi😚😚😚

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3 years ago

nice content po! fighting lang bhie oki?

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3 years ago

Hahaha talaga baπŸ˜‚πŸ€£ salamat bb😚

$ 0.00
3 years ago

yes naman po, gustong-gusto ko po kung paano niyo in-cnnect yung sarili niyo sa mga photos hihi

no worries! always welcome hehe

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3 years ago

Awwww thanks, why may po? Baby pa ako hahaha

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3 years ago

mas matanda po kasi yata kayo πŸ˜…

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3 years ago

Ilang taon kana?

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3 years ago

I like the way you took that photo, you can focus here

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3 years ago

Thank you andri ☺

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3 years ago

I hope you were doing fine.

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3 years ago

Hopefully, thanks king!☺

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3 years ago

Lol dito pala si review

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3 years ago

Hehe yessy ate meyzee

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3 years ago

Keep going caris the name ;) I like the way each images represents you and your emotions. πŸ’š

$ 0.02
3 years ago

Thank you ate meyzeee :)

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3 years ago