Can you Control your Anger ?

Helloo :)
First of all, if I speak for myself, I am a person who gets angry very quickly. I used to be unable to control it, but after the age of 20, I slowly started to control it. Now I can stay calm whenever I want :) I'll make a few suggestions that I have researched and found.

Does your blood jump to your brain when your kids don't listen to you? Do you get angry easily in traffic and have outbursts of anger? Although anger is a very natural and healthy emotional state, it can be destructive if uncontrolled. When outbursts of anger become chronic, they negatively affect our body, psychology and our loved ones. But do not be hopeless! Anger control is quite easy with the right methods.

If you want, let's take a look at 10 techniques you can use when you think you can't control your anger:

1. Give yourself time to breathe when you feel like you're starting to get angry

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If you're having a sudden tantrum and the blood splashes into your brain, take some time for yourself and take a deep breath from your diaphragm. Give yourself comforting suggestions such as “relax”, “nothing to worry about”, “calm down”. Continue breathing exercises and self-suggestions until you feel your anger begin to subside.

2. Express your anger correctly

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While venting anger is healthier than letting it go inside, it's important to do it right. After the initial effects of the outburst of anger have passed and you have calmed down a bit, try to express yourself calmly and as clearly as possible to the person in front of you. Take care to express your concerns and needs that cause you anger in a cold-blooded way without hurting the other person.

3. Express your anger by doing sports!

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Physical activities such as sports and walking increase the secretion of the hormone serotonin, which makes us feel happier and more comfortable, and also helps reduce stress and tension that cause us to get angry. When you feel your anger start to escalate, a short walk outdoors or doing a different physical activity that you love will take all your tension away.

4. Take short breaks when you feel your stress level rise

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If there are certain events during the day that cause you to increase your stress level and become angry, give yourself a short break at such moments. A few minutes of silence will help you understand your own thoughts better and get over the things that make you angry more easily. You can also review our 6 scientific suggestions that will help you get rid of stress for different techniques you can use in such moments.

5. Focus on the solutions, not the causes of your anger!

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Try to focus on how you can deal with this situation instead of focusing on the things that get on your nerves. Does it drive you crazy that your kids' rooms are always messy? Close the doors of their rooms. Does it get on your nerves that your spouse is constantly late for dinner? Take the meal time back a little bit or talk to your spouse and express that you can have a meal separately on certain evenings. Learning to look at your emotions from a different angle allows you to deal with situations that are out of your control much more easily.

6. Use “I” language instead of “You” in situations that cause you anger

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Criticizing and blaming the person in front of you in situations that increase your nervousness will only increase the tension. In such cases, try to construct sentences in the language of "I", which will allow you to express your feelings, instead of sentences that start with "you" accusing the other party. For example, if it bothers you that your spouse doesn't help with the dishes, you might feel like "You don't help at all with the housework!" Instead of saying, "It really upsets me that you didn't get up from the table as soon as you had dinner and didn't offer to help me."

7. Don't let anger turn you into a spiteful person!

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Learning to forgive is one of the most powerful virtues we can have. If you allow anger to rule you, after a while you may find yourself a prisoner in a prison of negative emotions that you have created. Forgiving the other party in your moments of anger allows you to evaluate your situation calmly and strengthens your relationships.

8. Take advantage of the power of humor in your tense moments!

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Laughing a little when you feel like you're starting to get angry will take all your tension away. Try to see the funny side of things that happen to you that make you angry. Learning to laugh at yourself reduces the impact of the events that made you angry in the first place, making it easier to realize your unrealistic expectations.

9. Instead of getting angry, try to improve your communication skills!

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When we communicate correctly with the people in front of us, we are less likely to get angry and increase our chances of establishing trusting relationships. This sense of trust allows us to make a positive start for our subsequent communications. One of the best communication exercises that can be used in conversations is to repeat what the other person said aloud in your own words, as you understand, by saying "I want to make sure I understand you correctly...". In this way, you can end potential conflicts before they begin, and keep unnecessary tantrums away from you.

10. Do not hesitate to seek professional support when you cannot cope with your anger!

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Learning anger management is a challenge in itself for anyone who has trouble with it. If, despite all your efforts, your anger causes behaviors that you will regret later or that cause offense to the people around you, it is time to talk to a psychologist who is an expert on this subject.

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Thank you for reading :)