The biggest obstacle to living our day : Ego

Are you one of those who expect that thing you aim to be happy, to be treated as you want? Or is it someone who thinks they can never be happy because of an unfulfilled expectation in the past? There are so many "obstacles" for us to be happy, right?

Is it really so, or are we missing a detail?

Our minds tend to rely on time to be happy. He either clings to the past or hopes for the future. With exceptions, he cannot fully experience the present moment, and he keeps turning the past or future time. Those who realize this turn to themselves from time to time and say, "Well, let me live the moment then!" Unfortunately, such an easy transition is not possible. Because they miss one detail: Our dear ego!

There are pages and pages of detail that can be written on the ego. But in its simplest form, it can be said that it contains everything that we see as ourselves and define ourselves through stories such as "me/mine". The repetitive patterns of emotion, thought, and reaction with which we identify ourselves are all factors that make up the ego. To give an example, your feeling of beauty-ugly, your perception of success-failure and your criteria, the emotions that arise when you feel unsuccessful according to these criteria, your angry reactions to events that have or did not happen, and hundreds more are parts of your ego, that is, your "self" story. It is not possible for you to live in the present moment because of the negative energy released as a result of all these thoughts, feelings and reactions created by your ego. Because all these cause you to pass the events through these filters and perceive things accordingly while looking at life like the glasses you put on your eyes.


I decided to write about this subject with the inspiration that came while reading this sentence and the rest of the relevant chapter in the book. Because it created a great awareness in me and helped me understand the subject more easily. I was also excited thinking about the awareness that it would awaken in many people while reading it. Eckhart Tolle, in his book, presents the connection between many related subjects such as awareness and ego to his readers in a very understandable language, while in the part that inspired me, he deals with the distorted relationship of ego and the present moment.

Eckhart Tolle, in him book The Power of Being, includes a very accurate statement summarizing this issue: “The ego is a broken relationship with the present moment.”

He states and explains that our ego's corrupt relationship with the present moment can take three forms. In the first type of relationship, the ego sees the present moment as a means to achieve its purpose. And because you are constantly trying to go somewhere else in the present moment, you can never be fully here. An example of this would be the things you are doing now for happy days to come, and the inability to fully live in the present moment. In the second, the ego sees the present moment as an obstacle to be overcome. He ignores the moment he lives until he reaches his goal and spends those moments in impatience and stress. Is it starting to look familiar? In the third, the ego sees the present moment as its enemy. Disliking the things you do, the environment you are in, and making complaints and accusations can be given as examples.

If you want to make peace with the present moment and live more in the present moment rather than the past or the future, the first thing you need to do is to start getting to know your ego and noticing its relationship to the present moment. For this reason, you often ask yourself, “What is my relationship to the present moment?” you can ask and classify your situation according to these three relationship types. And asking this question again and again every time you think of it, not just once, will be the key to transformation.

It is in our nature to find barriers between wanting to be happy and truly being. Changing that is a choice we can make. One of the most important steps to overcome these obstacles is to recognize our ego and its relation to the present moment. As you start to recognize and realize this, you can observe that the obstacles to happiness begin to disappear and your state of being happy increases.

With love...



Source: The Power of Being by Eckhart Tolle