Twilight - What have I done ?

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Avatar for Ykretz
Written by
3 years ago

Yes, this post is showing you I made a mistake.

When I was young I saw the tree first Twilight movies and, even if I didn't like it, I juste still wanted to know the end. But I was really curious about how were the last movies, could they be better ? Or even worse ?

Fortunately, recently Netflix added all the Saga on their platform. And that's enough for me to decide to suffer from the hardest of the torturesworst than my brain tumor 9 years ago !

At first, I wanted to make a post about the whole saga. One post for 5 movies. But when I saw that disaster I couldn't.

Yes yesterday I watched Twilight, the first episode.

You know, the first time I saw it was 13 years ago, when It was showing. That because at this moment I was 9 years old but my sister was a teenager. No need to say she was loving it and that's why she forces me to go to the theater with her when the 2nd and maybe the 3rd have been released.

When You are around 10 years old, you don't understand the things as much as when you're an adult. And that movie is at the same time agreeing and disagreeing with that.

When I was young I totally understood the story, and most of the jokes. Because for me yesterday nothing was a surprise. (My sister was loving it so much she saw it at least 30 times and as she was my babysitter when my parents were out... I also saw it (against my will) a bunch of times). I think I also understood what most of the characters were feeling. But Damn, Edwards is the weirdest weirdo I've even seen in my life !

At a moment I thought I was watching a parody ! That was so much awkward I actually wanted to stop to watch Vampires Suck, the best parody I know of this movie. Because at least they're not pretending to do a serious movie.

They show him staring at her like that during the ENTIRE SCIENCE CLASS

Imagine someone starring at you during one hour with that intensity. I'm sure Bella is having headache because of that !

I'm sure we can find explanation, he's probably trying to read in her mind (which is one of his abilities) but is realizing he can't do it on her, so he's trying harder. BUT IN THE REAL WORLD THAT'S A REASON TO CALL THE POLICE !

I am thanking any god or divinity or anything else for letting these twp main actors having a career after those movies. I really don't understand how they could have find work after that but they are now both making awesome movies, I really love them each time I saw them. But here, that is terrible. Not only the characters but the actors' acting is also pretty medium. I never feel something great.

The only moment it is something else that cringe is few moment when Kristen Stewart is alone or with her dad and she really just looks like a sort of sad teenager, it's to my mind pretty realistic, but so much different it looks like she's playing in another movie from the rest of the Casting.

I hope this will change in the next movies because if that is the same for the 5, I'm really going to cry.

The vampires are probably the more uncommon vampire that exist in the different fantasy worlds. I'll don't speak of their skin just shining when the sun hit them. That's too much for me. And I don't really understand because, that's pretty ugly. But at least there is a reason to not let the vampires under the sun...

I don't know how have been made the visual effects in this movie, but when we see Edward running and he looks like he's running above the ground, like, it seems he's not even touching it, that's too much for me, not realistic, not nice to see.

And the fights ? Wtf ? When the vampires are fighting they're just jumping, it looks like cats hiding when you throw water on them. That's ridiculous.

I mean, everything is weird and look terrible, that's really great abilities, having this in the real life would be insane, but that's not the real life, that is a movie and that looks like a joke. And when I say that I'm not overstating. That looks a lot like the movie "What we do in the shadows" which is a total joke, a Mockumentary about a house sharing of few vampires. (A must watch, there is also a series now if you like)

Everything is cringe. EVERYTHING !

Imagine you're sleeping and you see that in your bedroom ?

This guy is terrifying ! He knows that girl since a week and already stalking her that much. What is wrong with him ? At a 100 years old you're supposed to know what's inappropriate or not !

And there not just him. All the people, they're overreacting for everything. The images show the characters as there are just normal people, if the vampires was something that could happen in the real life. It looks like it is in our world. But they are speaking like if they were in an huge epic dramatic saga like Lord of the Rings.

The two only characters I'm able to like in this movie are played by Anna Kendrick (which is one of my favorite actress) and Justin Chon. Not because I like them but because they are the only ones acting like if they were real. Even if Justin is unbearable, he looks like a real human. A real unbearable teenager human. And I'm sure I could have been friends with him if we were in the same school. But Bella and Edward are living on another planet. All their dialogs are just shit to my ears.

I don't know if, in the real life, you already met someone who was acting like he was in a movie, saying long emotional sentences, always trying to look nice, doing things that looks to be made just to shot a Slow motion. I've met some of them in my life. Each time I was incomfortable as hell. That's exactly the same here.

Really ? I'll pitch you the story :

Bella is falling in love with a vampire and they have to beat 3 villains vampires.

Every other side is just Bella or Edward making their dramatic annoying things. One day they are friends, then they stop talking together. That really reminds me a toxic relationship I had in High school, that was not fun nor entertaining, that's the same with this relationship, just boring.

ANY GOOD SIDE ?

Ireally saw some good stuff on that movie. But most of them are just about the Cinema side. Like a really nice decor, great lights, this frame is really great ! Wow, a really smooth travelling.

The Baseball scene is also probably the best of the movie until the bad vampires came. Really that was entertaining and that was also the only music I liked in the movie.

I'm not gonna lie. That was a pain in the ass. But it seem I love to suffer because I just want to watch the next ones even more than before.

Since I think I've already said most of the problems and the next movies will also have them, I'll probably don't make a post per movie. I know that I really hate the second opus, I don't like the story, the characters,

I hope there is not too much hate in that post. I really tried to be as peaceful as possible but that was really hard.

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Avatar for Ykretz
Written by
3 years ago

Comments

I just can't find a reason to watch twilight seriously, I saw the trailer of it many time but I'm on the furst part and nothing catch my attention to continue it, I'm just being honest here seriously. Maybe because I'm not into vampire movies 😖

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3 years ago

You're totally right, i still don't know why do I want to watch them, but that's terrible, i usually don't like vampire movies neither.

I would really be easier if I was with some friends to watch this, we could make jokes about it instead of just crying because it's really bad

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3 years ago