How Music Saved My Marriage !!!!
No I'm not perfect but I hope you see my worth..." I was struck by that particular line of Pink Sweat's song; "at my worst" I was really emotionally down after a misunderstanding with my husband, It had become an everyday thing, no day was devoid of a touch of sadness for me after our first 3 months of marriage. it's been 3 years of no complete Joy; there was always one thing or the other to ruin the day. Sometimes it's as if I have gotten so used to living that way but most times I get hit really hard because that wasn't the kind of marriage I envisioned for myself even for a second.
To make matters worse, everything always had a way of falling back to me, my husband always blamed me of pushing him to the wall but that wasn't the case for me. His constant blame on me made to start wondering if he was so light-weighted that just anything pushes him to the wall. what about me? I asked him one day, don't you think you push me to the wall too? you always talk as if I have never been any good, I added. That was an outburst of how I really felt and that was how the routine misunderstanding for that day started. I had a problem with expressing myself, I yearned so much for a perfect and easy way to let my husband know how I really feel but it seemed like something that was impossible. My marriage was getting ruined by the day; my greatest nightmare seemed to be playing out right before me.
I was always caught up in the midst of all the quarrel since I felt I was the victim, I felt my husband always fails to understand the good intentions behind my actions as I try to understand his and with what I have heard from a few persons while growing up, I started accepting all the blames. While growing up I have heard few persons mention that I have a complicated way of relaying my good intentions to someone, I knew it wasn't a nice one but all trials to untangle myself from it proved abortive. For a very long time,I had looked for something that would relay that message to my husband just the way it is and in the simplest form since words have failed me until I came across that song. Music gave me the relief. I felt like all my problems were all over the moment I heard that line. My husband would definitely understand me when he listens to this song, I thought to myself and I wasn't wrong after all.
I waited for my husband to returned from work, had tried all my best not to get him angry, had to connect my mp3 player while he was eating to play at my worst, that perfect line caught his attention, he requested for the name of the artist, which I told him. He asked if I had paid him to record the song, I just smiled while looking at him.He smiled back, I knew a part of me was going to be understood by him.
He walked up to me, told me to get dressed while we go for a drink. He requested we played the song on a repeat till we got to the Bar.There is a slight change in our marriage, my husband understands me more now.
Positive Impacts of Music
Hans Christian Andersen once said " where words fail, music speaks
Robert G. Ingersoll also said " music expresses feelings and thoughts, without language; it was below and before speech and it is above and beyond all words.
Music is a universal language without a language, this is because though music cannot be limited by any language in the world it is still a language that anyone , anywhere in the world understands. Apart from it's quality of speaking were words fail, music has many other powerful effect on human beings such as:
Lightening mood : This happens when am menstruating, I used to have series of mood swings. All I do Is listening to some R & B and I will be fine. Also when am sad, I do listen to a handful of music to help lift up my spirit. Music is indeed a balm for the soul.
Building task endurance: Difficult task or longer ones, could be made simple or less difficult to bear when we listen to good music. I do a lot of work out with my headset connected to my ear. It has help in keeping me fit and also lessen the fatigue nature of most strenous exercises I do.
Inspiration: this effect of music can never be overlooked, because it has been so helpful. If not for music my marriage would have still been a mess, I drew inspiration from Pink sweat$ song, which I used to confront my husband and today we are living happily.
Reduces Anxiety : I still remember going for a job interview with my headset on, why ? I know you are curious to know, the truth I was scared of the interview, I felt I wasn't good enough, but listening to good music helped relax my nerves, and boast my performances.
Improves sleeping habit: I can't imagine myself going to bed without my wireless headsets on, it helps me sleep faster and its also extend my sleeping time .
Other benefits include;
Improve learning (for some people).
Boost memory/ mental alertness.
The postive effects of music on the human race can never be overemphasized. The feeling of social connection it creates is second to none; it is the one thing that people who differ in every other thing can have in common.
Louis Armstrong was very right when he said " Music is life itself".
Lead image : Unsplash
