I challenge you not to laugh or grin: Funniest Filipino jokes of all time

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Avatar for Vincent21
2 years ago
Topics: Funny, Challenge, Jokes

Heeyy! Yoww! Good evening to ya all? How's your day? About mine? Wellssss, It's totally full of disappointment, that's why I keep on looking for something that could make me lift my self up. So! I came up with an idea. Gotta find something that can make me laugh in tears. I scrolled down on facebook and look for something funny. Though it won't help me cope with my problems anyway haha.

I know some of us here haven't read these funny jokes yet. So, I'll try to post this crazy things up, maybe I could make someone laugh. If you're a melancholy guy, I challenge you not to laugh on these funniest filipino jokes of all time. By the way, I made the 70% of the scenario of these jokes. Lol, do you really have to say that?

Alright! Without further a do! Let's get it on!

The loyal husband

One day the husband left home for a duty. While she was cleaning their room, she saw something in the cabinet. Three pieces of rice grain and a 50 pesos 1$. His wife wondered why would her husband save that small amount of money. She thought that it was for their monthsary. When her husband gets back home, she immediately asked her husband.

"Honey? For what are these things that I saw on the cabinet? 3 grains of rice and a 50 pesos?" She inquired.

"Ohh! Honey, That's nothing!"

"Will you answer, or I'm gonna slap your face?" Furiously inquired.

" Oh honey, that three grains of rice symbolizes the times that I lied to you."

" Are you sure honey? For five years you only lied to me thrice?"

She immediately hugs her husband. You're really are a kind husband. I never regretted that I chose you as my lover.

awwhhh thank you so much honey! What about the 50 pesos? She inquired in delightful manner."

"Honeyyy.. The grains had gotten too many that's why I sell it, it reached a kilo." Huhu honeyy..

Wife : Bang! Boom! Slap, scratch! Kick! Flying plates! Crackss! Swoosh!

Husband : Yameteee!!!

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The ridiculous hell

One day, Mr. Kahwattan died in an accident. So, he goes straight to hell.

Sathan: Welcome! To the hell my friend! (evil laugh) Hawhawhaw!

Mr. K: Noo!! Send me back to the real world.

Sathan: Don't be so overacting! You can't escape here, that's how life goes! However, there are some plenty of rooms for you. Since you died in an accident, I have chosen these 3 rooms for you. So Choose carefully! (evil laugh) Hwahwa cough! Cough!

Mr. k: I should be wise.

Sathan Offered him the first room, which is a hell like septic tank! The yellow and stinky dirts reached up to the neck of the prisoners. And it seems so difficult to stay there forever so. Mr. k ended up a decision.

Mr. K : Hmm, it looks like the people here are suffering! I must not choose this one. Send me to the other room mr. Sathan!

Sathan : How quickly you decide, Alright! To the next room!

The next room, was too dark and it seems so empty and silent. But when satan switches the light on, he saw the people unable to talk due to, high level of yellow dirt. It reached their mouth. That's why the prisoners seems silent.

Mr. K : I don't want it here! Send me up to the last room. The people here are suffering, they can't even shout.

Sathan : Okay, It's up to you! As you wish.

The last room seems so casual and it's not difficult to look at. The prisoners were having their break and recess time. They were drinking coffee in the table, with low level of yellow dirt. It's only, knee-level high.

Mr. K: Sathan! I want it here! I will choose this room! Those other two are way, difficult and would make me suffer a lot. I saw the prisoners drinking coffee and relaxing here.

Sathan : As you wish!

Both of them immediately transported to the specific room. Chingg!!

Sathan : Well, well, well, you guys are having a break time? Welcome your new member Mr. kahwattan!

Prisoners clap and cheer! Whooo!!

Warden devil : Alright! The break time is done! Get back to your positions! Lie down to your yellow sh*t stinky dirty poop bed! ( GrAhaha)

Mr. K : Opps! Ahehehe. Heheh. Wrong choice.

________________________________________________

Watzzup guys. Did I ever make you laugh or even grin? It even made me laugh, though I'm the one who wrote it. Tahaha.

Remember, this content is fictional and is only imaginary. Intended to make you laugh and grin.

Anyways thank you for dropping by, and reading this funny article just to make you laugh. Dont forget to comment, about your reactions. Shazzam!!

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+ 2
Avatar for Vincent21
2 years ago
Topics: Funny, Challenge, Jokes

Comments

You made my day and I'm worrying about her husband 😅

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Hahaha, thank you!

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Bwahahahah muhigda diay sa.tae nakatawa sad ko sa bugaß hahaha

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Thanks for making me laugh today 😂😂🤣🤣. The first joke, the wife thought the husband was honest, without knowing the number of grains of rice was too much that he had to sell it. So funny 🤣😀

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Hahaa, thank you so much for interacting. That was too funny, first time i read it

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Katawa man ko atung loyal husband Vince uyy Hahaha. 1 kilo na diay sa kadaghan.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Haha, gane pandamay kaayu

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Haha, grabe yung tawa ko lalo na nung si mr. Kahwattan. Sa sobrang choosy niya napunta sya dun sa mas nakakadiring lugar.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Ako nga rin po daming tawa ko dyan.

$ 0.00
2 years ago