Everything that happens in this life I believe, is not by chance. I believe that everything we go through is for a reason. A lot of people believe that life is all about bliss and happiness but they're quick to forget that life also has it's bad and ugly sides. This life they say, is not a bed of roses and we need to understand and accept that. Not everything will go as planned and these different phases of life make it an interesting school to learn a lot from because we learn a lot from every single phase of life.
So last month to be honest was like hell for me. A lot happened; hearts were broken and tears were shed but I went through all that and came out in one piece because my Father God Almighty was there with me and guiding and helping me survive that storm.
Also last month, I learnt that God sometimes let unpleasant circumstances come our way to teach us, groom us, and test us so that after all that, we will come forth as gold-pure and beautiful. You see, gold in it's raw form can't be used to make these beautiful jewelries we see, admire and buy to adorn ourselves. It has to go through a series of processes to remove all it's impurities so that it can be pure and good for use and that's what God does in our lives.
The Bible says that God hardens us to difficulties and He disciplines those He loves and are His. So He lets unpleasant circumstances come our way to draw us close to Him if we are far and also to make us stronger because if He pampers us, we'll just sit and remain comfortable without knowing how to fight life's battles.
Bad times aren't supposed to keep us away from God, it's supposed to draw us closer to Him because we need Him in every step of the way and this is what I had to learn. I always thought that because I believe in Jesus and follow Him, nothing bad should ever happen to me. I mean I thought that since God's Word says that all things work together for those that love God, then I shouldn't have problems because I love God but the truth God revealed to me is that it's not only good circumstances that show that all things are working together for your good, the bad ones also show that all things are working together for your good. The verse didn't say "some things" but ALL things so it doesn't matter if it's good, bad or ugly, what matters is that they are working together for your good. All you need to do is be patient, put your faith in God and trust Him completely.
So the Holy Spirit told me to take a decision that was really hard but would make Him happy and also help me in my walk with Him but I wasn't really ready. He wanted me to totally depend on Him and no one else during exams, putting all my trust in Him and leaning on no one else's understanding, even my own. This was really hard but I agreed to it even though part of me knew I couldn't do it perfectly on my own. I honestly needed His grace to do that one. It was going well; I obeyed Him during the first two exams and He really helped me but later on, I stumbled and disobeyed by asking others for help because i was scared of failing if I didn't and i truly wasn't prepared for the exams. God was merciful through it all; He watched me disobey Him and still forgave me and stretched out His arms to accept me and I'm really grateful for that.
So when the exams had ended and the results started getting released, my world looked like it was crumbling. The first result wasn't good and I cried bitterly and asked God "why is this happening to me? I didn't expected this" then wiped my tears and hoped for the best. I tried so hard to exercise faith but on seeing that result, a little part of that faith turned to doubt but by God's grace, I read His word and received my faith, hope and strength back. The second result was released and it wasn't good too, I just broke down and cried so much because it was very painful to watch all I hoped for come crashing down. I felt hopeless but God gave me hope again.
The third result was released and the same thing happened and honestly, that was it. I almost lost it, it was an unbelievable, terrible and horrific experience. No amount of tears could solve that problem, no one but God knew the immense pain I felt. I started asking God questions because I honestly thought it would be easy; I thought my imaginations and things I hoped for would come true but I guess that was just reality. One thing that made me feel better was crying out to God and letting Him know how it hurt so bad and He in return, gave me His peace that passes all understanding. During that time, I just had to sit back, observe and learn from my situation. Soon, another result was released and to my surprise, I saw a good score which was like rain in my drought of a situation and I was really happy and grateful to God.
I know there are other people like me that are going through this kind of storm and my advice to you is to hold on to God and never let go. I know the situations can be tempting and you may feel that God has forsaken you but I can assure you that He's even the closest in that situation. He's not just with you but He's in you, strengthening you so you won't give up. The truth is that God never promised us a stress and trouble free life but He did promise to be with us till the end of everything and never forsake us so please put all your trust in Him and cast your burdens on him because He cares deeply for you.
Just felt I should share my experience with everyone because someone can learn from it. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks for reading:)