How to cheer up when your down

After 24 hours my birthdays done now I'm back to reality, where I need to deal with pain and problems. And i think when I write I feel a bit better because I had someone to talk to seriously.

What was the most painful part you've ever had in your life?

While im writing this, I remember pains that i thought i already let go. But everytime I felt sad to that same person who hurt me, the pain often came back for no reason. Because there Is no closure at all.

How hard to say sorry?

Of all the people that hurted me so badly I didn't remember them to apologize even for a second. And for real I expect them to say sorry but I think that would never happen.

They never bother to ask about my feelings, how bad I have been and they never cared at all. Because I did some mistakes it dosent mean that I never got to change for a better me. And that was awful for me.

What could be hardest thing I must do?

CRY AND CRY..

Until I feel better, but sometimes as we aged maturely you will see yourself as a looser. And it really hurts a lot.. Even if I wont to be rewarded for my articles all I want is to ease the pain that I always had in my past and until now. And having someone to talk will surely give me an advice but they always have their own opinion and they will always says to me I'm the martyr wife they ever saw.

I just put up with everything I can to stay even I want to run as far I could go and never came back at all. But how about my kids I know they need me somehow especially our baby I treat her special because she needs me most. But I have no stable job that can feed us, buy our needs and pay for electricity and water so what in the world should I stay if I was treaten as a useless person. But I know he doesn't want me to feel those things. So I'm trying harder to help him.

To all my readers please don't be sad and get worried about us, this is how I want to be known for, from the saddest to the strongest I can ever be. All of this, I choose to be near them, because i want to solve our problems together with them. How can we be called family if I'll run away. But sometimes we reach the limits. And want to end it all. But sometimes the more we hold on the more we gain stronger. I just let it across my ears and endure the pain till I can.

How to cheer up when I'm down?

He would rather apologize in a way that I didn't expect he will, i never heard him say sorry but I know he realized he done something that hurts me because our relationship with each other is different. We sometimes fight like ordinary ones do. But our love is silence but we hears the beat of our hearts....

And sometimes I cry alone and hug my kids and they'll ask whats wrong? and I'll answer nothing it's just my eyes it hurts.. Crying is a not a sign that you loose the battle. But it really removes your sadness and painful moments..