Life And Relationship Series: You Are Not In Control
In life, we always want the best things there are to give. We want to be rich, successful, well to do and famous, and that's all good. It's only natural to want that. But you see, majority of us want it, but few of us will ever get any of these things, not to mention all. This may be as a result of our hard work or smart work or not.
To achieve these things we want, we are taught to get educated,get a good job, become an entrepreneur, have multiple income stream and all that, while we are growing up. The motivational speakers tells us, if we want it hard enough, we will get it, they tell us it's all about our mindset, it's all up in our mind (I'm not here to dispute that), and that's all well and good.
The implications of our upbringing and all these motivational snippets is that, we are conditioned to believe we are in charge, we are in control, we determine our own fate and destiny. This is good for our human minds( who wouldn't love the assurance that they get to decide what they happen to and what happens to them).
Armed with this belief, we course through life, pursuing our passions and desires. The route taken might be quite different, but everybody expects the same result; to succeed. Everybody wants to believe that if they follow the path chosen and follow it hard enough, they will get to their promised land. There are those who try multiple avenue hoping one will eventually work. But in all that, most people will still not be successful or meet with disappointing level of success.
This will eventually lead to a feeling of frustration and dejection, of lamenting and complaining. One might find him/herself wondering why nothing seem to be going well for him/her. The answer can be found in a certain knowledge we often intentionally don't want to have.
More than half the feeling of frustration,unhappiness and dejection in the world wouldn't be if people will come to the knowledge that they aren't in charge of anything (with the exception of how they respond to things or circumstances). Yes, I said that. You're not in charge of anything, not your life, not your desires and not your aspirations either. I know this might really be shocking to you, but no matter how much you believe you are or should be, you're not.
The sooner you accept this fact, the better. Once you accept this fact, you're relieved of a lot of burden, it's actually quite liberating. A lot of things that will need to fall in place for you to get that result you desire are not within your control, so why hold yourself 'responsible' for all of it?
Learn to accept things are not the way you would like it, instead of complaining why they are not. This makes for a more liberating and full life. In a manner of speaking, we are here on earth to 'have fun', not run the show or determine what will or will not be. Knowing this will relieve you of all that self and societal expectation and allow enjoy a little sunshine on the beachππ.
Conclusion
This is not to say you're not responsible at all for your life, so go home and stay under the sunshine till thy kingdom come, what will be, will be. No!! That's not what I'm saying.
The point is, you're not ultimately responsible for a lot of things that will happen to and for you in your lifetime. Make your plans, pursue your goals, if it works, congrats and if it doesn't, you gave it your best. Move on with your life, it wasn't your fault if it didn't pan out. Live life like everyday is your last....
Oh hey, we kinda wrote about the same topic. Hahaha.