Little miss birthday
I planned that I would be back on the exact day when my parents had unprotected sex, kidding aside! ^^
24th of March, another cute baby was born in this world. She was a crybaby in her teenage years, but while growing up, she's exposed to a lot of things that led her to dream big and survive for the things that she deserves.
My birthday last year was celebrated with my best friend. It was one of the priceless moments of my life. That's the only birthday that I experienced to celebrate, even though it's not a grand celebration as others do. It was simple, but full of genuineness and love. Some of you might wonder why that's the only celebration of my birthday I ever experienced in my entire life, because celebrations for low-income class are something like once in a blue moon. There are many people who don't do celebrations on their birthdays because it's either, they have no privilege to do that or they actually don't want to celebrate. Unfortunately, I am always destined in the first one.
I chose to stay at home, even though I should enjoy my birthday. I should go to my friends and have fun because money or food wouldn't be a problem for them. We can celebrate my birthday without money and food, bonding will do. But sadly, as we grow older, it doesn't be easy for us to make time for our loved ones. Even if y'all say, “if they wanted to, they would” —No, it's not applicable in every situation. There are things that even we have the will or eagerness to do a certain thing, we can't for some reason. They are so busy with their research papers, and other staffs of them just like me during also the birthday of my two friends in my circle. I didn't attend that time, but they considered my reason and understood my situation, which is I did right now. Though, they never forget to greet me at exactly 12 am and I appreciate them, specially the effort for waiting that shows how they value me as they friend. I must say, “if they can, they literally would.”
Another thing, growing up makes you no longer excited to your birthday. Idk, but do u guys find the same way? Unlike when I was 10 years old, I cried when my mama told me that we cannot celebrate my birthday. I also remember when I turned 15, I cried so much because I'm expecting that I could celebrate my birthday, but it turned out we had to stay home because my mom got positive to Covid-19, I was so disappointed. Then now, no longer feels the same excitement before, it's part of evolving, I guess.
I chose to enjoy my company and watch those favorite celebrities who never failed to make me happy. My birthday wasn’t become special because I chose to treat it as a normal day. Though, how I wish that one day I’ll experience the kind of celebration where I need to blow the candle, people in my surroundings were singing, and I have to wish for myself. I hope one day, my birthday will be celebrated in a way I wanted to. May the universe let me experience the kind of celebration I truly deserve. I am happy for those people who had enjoyed their birthdays, even if it's a grand celebration or not. But I knew that one day,
the things that meant for us will eventually be ours.
Still, at the end of the day, it depends on us how we control our minds and emotions in these kind of circumstances. I could say, I enjoyed on my own, and I am thankful that I already opened another chapter of my life.
To little miss,
Your younger self wouldn't believe about your life today. Keep going. Be the woman who's walked through fire. Your breakthrough is one step closer. Cheers to your 17 years of survival!
