I think I need to slow down from using Tiktok, every time  I open it all I see are videos about Liam Payne and it hurts me so much. I have no idea about his existence as a 1D member but now after looking at his previous videos, he has the gift of singing. I didn't know I was grieving already and I think about his death because he has a promising talent so it feels everything is gone wasted and he is so young to die.  Well, one thing I realized is drugs have altered his life. His ex made a book about how abusive he was and it's not unbelievable because drugs can cause you to be physically dangerous. I wonder if he never got into drugs, he wouldn't ruin his life career especially since it changed who he was and many fans hated him when he was alive.  Not a fan girl but listening to their band songs with him on the music makes me cry thinking about it. Also, I just realized that he was attractive and his accent was beautiful. I only became his fan girl after he died which is so late and absurd. I just want to share this thing because I've been thinking about it lately 💔