It's your life.
Life is too short to spend it like other's want so do whatever you want, do what you love or do things what you are scared to do. Do what you think is right. You can find thousand things to be sad about but find that one thing you can be happy about.
If you don't live your life as you want then How will you live it? Are you really happy with your life? or are you just pretending to be happy?
Just stop thinking about your past or regrets because everyone have them you know no one is perfect and you can't change them then learn from them and move on. I know it's hard but everything is possible.
There is so many people who are fake so let them go and find some true ones. Everything will be alright. Believe me. Just live the present so you will not regret it. Stop thinking and take a deep breath. Don't rely on someone, rely on yourself.
Love yourself. Just be happy!
You are not living to satisfy others