Comparison

On this particular day, my Dad was talking to my Mom on phone. I didn’t know what they were saying but I could see her nod from the window. She called me afterwards to bring a stool for her, and told me to sit on it. She brought a blade out and scraped my hair.

I didn’t know what was happening, but 10-year-old me was so obedient. My dad got back that night and told me to prepare for a common entrance examination as I will be going to one of the best secondary schools to further my education. He told me it was a boarding school and I felt bad knowing I won’t be seeing my mom anymore.

The next day, I went to my primary school to get my testimonial and result. I then took some passport photograph. I got home and found my parents arguing. My mom had said to my dad that why am I going to the same school as Tope’s child? Must he always follow Tope’s way of doing things? It was then I realized I was going to a boarding school because my dad’s colleague daughter is there too. She was already a year ahead of me. I didn’t know the girl, I’d never met her but my mom wasn’t happy to see me going to another state to school.

I passed the examinations, both the common entrance exam and the written interview. I remember we resumed October 11th that year. I was placed in green house. I was nervous at first but I was easily matched-make with a girl to be my friend by both parents. We were asked to bring no clothes from home and we were given 2 house wears and a white plain gown for church.

So, yesterday, my dad said his friend’s daughter, the same girl I went to boarding school with has started writing books and was asking what I have been doing with my time during this ASUU strike period?. On several occasions I have seen my Dad compare some kids to his kids. He had come home one day to tell my brother that one of his friends kid have gotten a job at a big firm but ignorance won’t make him see that. Can parents really see that their children are trying their best? We really do not need the pressure.

50% of Parents are like that. They compare you to other people’s kids. They want you to see the exact way some kids are, they want you to act like them. A friend of mine once told me his Mom had called him one day to look at his neighbor and how calm the boy was. Luckily, my friend got admission into the same school the boy got admitted to. He told me the second time he saw that boy in the school environment, he was smoking weed. If his mom had seen that boy that day with weed would she had wish her son was like him?

Another occasion is where my mom said I dress indecently. She said I love clothes below my knees and asked me to dress like a certain girl in the vicinity. This girl loves to wear native a lot. Her skirts are always long and she’s always having a scarf tied around her head. Today, the girl is a mother. She gave birth out of wedlock. Does she still want me to be like her? I don’t think so.

So many youths have something to say about being compared to other kids. Parents would always have something to say, but know what you are doing. Do not fall under the influence of pressure. If you are not passionate about something and it is being forced to you, if you can step away from it, please do. You don’t have to marry at a certain age just because your mother is singing it as a song to you that your childhood friend is married. You don’t have to learn that trade if you are not passionate about it.

We can do better when raising our own kids in the future. You don’t have to compare your kids to other kids. Know what they love from when they are little. Do not compulsory a profession to your kids. There’s nothing like a particular course is professional and some aren’t professional. With the way things are going in this country, I don’t think there is something like professional or non-professional courses. Let’s your children go for their dreams. Don’t be ignorant!