What is your ideal age to marry? What are the things you think that you should accomplish first before settling down?
As a young woman at 21, with a mental age of 16, the idea of marriage really scares me! And in this article, I'll tell you why...
I noticed that as I am slowly getting older, that some of my batchmates really seems to be in a hurry to settle down. Some of them are already married, lived in, some had their first baby...
I'm not saying that there's any wrong with that, I am actually happy for them for having a strong heart of taking such big steps in their life!
I'm not envious either. Because tbh I'm actually still scared to enter that stage - to become a wife or a mother. Not just because I think 21 is too young to marry, but also I haven't had achieve anything yet!
Well, I have a boyfriend that I love so much. A great guy! I'd kill just to marry him. But as soon as possible? No.
I love him, but I think marriage does not just need love to actually work.
Me, myself knows I'm not stable enough to have that kind of commitment. Personally, I think I still need to improve myself - emotionally, physically and mentally.
Because how can I even take care of my future husband and future kids if I don't even know how to treat my self well yet?
One other reason is I can't even support myself financially yet. I want to at least graduate first, pass my LET exam, and then get hired as a teacher. (I'm not that type of woman who relies solely to her man's financial support, Nuh uh!)
I want to at least save a pretty reasonable amount of money to start my own family first.
Honestly, it is not just about whether your partner is the right one for you, but also if you are also the right person for him/her to spend the rest both of your lifetime.
Make sure that you're fully ready to take that step. Do not just marry on a whim!
Don't just marry because you love him/her so much.
Don't just marry because you are "soul mates"
Don't just marry because you want to bind your partner to yourself as if you own him/her.
Don't romanticize marriage too much!
Ever heard any married couple claiming that marriage is a simple thing? No.
Plan it smart. Take your time. Love and build foundations.
Because I am not in a rush. How about you?
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Lovelots,
Shuu ❣️
