Missin' the old tree.

Date: January 27,2022
Author: Sequoia

'I miss the old me'

The once a stress-free and happy-go-lucky kid.

The eyes that only sees beauty and positive perspective towards life.

Caring and loving heart that favors no one.

Bright and genuine smiles are no longer visible in her face. Or maybe still visible, but no longer true.

Hands that are full of excitement everytime it holds a paper and pen to write on.

To express the condition of her heart.

To touch and engrave something in the heart of her audience by her imaginations and limitless imaginary world.

'I miss the old me'

Everything changes in just a blink of an eye.

Write and it will make you better.

It'll lead you to your dreams and goals.

Writing will allow you to expand your knowledge and improve your skills

But why does it seem like I got the opposite of all those promises and expected outcomes?

Why do I feel like, yesterday's works are far better than today's so-called masterpiece?

Losing a loved one is the hardest thing that could happen to a person, they say.

But have they ever experienced losing their passion?

Do they have any idea how painful it us watching yourself turning from better to worst?

The pressure. The comparison. The disappointments.

The feeling of left behind. Watching other people rising up while you are slowly falling apart?

Got broken. Insulted. Pitied on.

As I dive into the deepness of this unrecognizable emotion, I found myself clueless. Lost. Demotivated. Imprisoned of my own thoughts and negativity.

I don't know where it started. The only thing I know was that,

I woke up one day, having no urge to perform and do better.

Contented and decided to settle in the mediocracy.

Torn between staying like this forever, or, gather myself up again.

Easy as it may seem, but nope. I was chained in this routine. Mindset. Belief. I know that I won't stay like this forever, but for now, please let me be.

'I miss the old me'

I have no choice but to just look back and reminisce those good old days. I will never be the same again. I am destined for several changes. I may not get my old self. But I can always create a better version of me.

But then again, just for now,

Allow me to miss the old me.

________________________

Author's Viewpoint

Comparing my present write ups with the older ones and I saw a vast difference. I don't have any idea on when did I started losing the excitement amd spark that I felt everytime the point of the pen touches the surface of the thin sheets from the pulp of woods. Maybe because I get used to it? Anyhow, this would be the last article that I am going to spread negativity this week. Lol. Just wanted to let it out and allow my heart to breath again. Thanks for u your time guys!