My Troubled Partner

We know very well that there are no people without problems. The important thing is that we have a trouble partner with whom we can open up and share their problems with us... In my opinion, the most accurate definition of "partner in trouble" is to listen carefully and patiently to the person in front of us, to shed light on their troubles without upsetting them, to approve them wholeheartedly when describing the injustices they have suffered, and to make them think more deeply and objectively if possible.

Because when people have a problem, the first or the only thing they look for is to pour their heart out to someone they trust. It is as if he is talking in a psychologist's chair, as he comes to his senses... To talk, to chat is to have a short conversation. What they want is to be "Discharge", not to get advice or offer a solution.

However, we generally agree with what they say with comparative, suggestive and guiding sentences and answers such as "Come and look on the brighter side..." or "There are worse ones than you," or even "If I tell you what happened to my neighbor, you'll have a sore lip". We also make mistakes with this behavior. However, what those who have trouble expect from us is to listen carefully, to feel the friendly warmth of the other person and to be given the right.

We should reflect to the other side how sincere and understanding we are while listening to trouble. The other person will be extremely pleased with the presence of someone who listens and understands him. He does not expect discourse from us about what he should do or how he should feel. He just wants to pour out what's inside his rib cage.

Success, peace and happiness in our lives depend on our social skills and our harmonious relations with other people. In order to be able to cooperate with them and to get along well, we often have to be partners in trouble. If we develop and train ourselves in this direction, it is possible for us to gain a level skill in getting along well, correctly and nicely with other people.

There are a number of positive and constructive behavior patterns that we should not forget. In my opinion, a sincere smile comes first. It is a very effective step. The Chinese say, "He who does not know how to smile should not open a shop." It gives the message to the other person, “I accept you as you are, with all your pluses and minuses.” He also feels valued, important, meaningful and relaxed.

Another is to give the feeling of “I am an easy-going, friendly person with whom you can talk about many subjects easily”. The way to achieve this is to listen to it with all our attention, without getting bored. Listening is the true measure of attention and interest in human relations. When we listen intently, with concentration, we reflect on him that he is valuable to us. This makes that person extremely comfortable and happy.

In addition to your friends, the best leaders and managers are those who listen to others and understand human psychology. Just listening is giving it a right. It is surrendering the right to quarrel.

If someone listens to us attentively, with pleasure, with understanding, we trust him. When we trust him, he acts closer to us, trusts us, and an atmosphere of friendship is formed. With the energy created by this environment, the person in front of us values ​​himself more, loves and gets stronger. Listening carefully to a person gives the listener tremendous personal mastery and inner discipline. Inner discipline is a powerful trait.

Listening is a very powerful communication behavior. It is the primary way of making a person experience the deepest meaning of their existence. People only find themselves while being listened to by someone else, and get rid of the thought of being alone, helpless and lonely.

Most of us think that friendships are formed and rooted in conversation. This is not true. True friendship comes from listening. If both parties listen to each other sincerely, a "spiritual blood brotherhood" is experienced.

The third message we will give to the other person is to show him that we are happy to be together and listen to him despite his troubles. The deepest need of human psychology is the desire to be pleased. It creates feelings of being valued and loved. Those who can make others happy are also the happiest.

If the one who cares has characteristics such as generosity, determination, benevolence, punctuality, tolerance and cultural richness, praising and complimenting him will help him understand his own worth and will give him strength to fight his problems. His happiness will reflect on us.

A shared picture of happiness emerges. Shared happiness is a strong, lasting happiness that has its foundation. Moods that make us happy with the happiness of others renew the meaning of life and add “Lightness” that is difficult to describe.

Let's not forget that the only thing that is permanent is the gain of what is done with sincerity and love!..