Recognizing the function of emotions

Feeling good is so important that it seems to be our only goal right now. Words like, “I must feel good, so I must think positively, everything will be fine, I must always be positive…” go on and on. So what does it mean to feel good? What's it like? Or how to get this feeling?

We all have certain emotions that we describe as “good” and “bad”. The ones we define as good are usually feelings such as happiness, joy and excitement, while the ones we define as bad are feelings such as fear, anxiety, hatred and anger. So in order to feel good, do we have to feel emotions that we think are "good"? So, how are these feelings achieved? I say it is achieved because in today's world there is a perception that we can choose our emotions or reach them as a goal.

For this reason, I think it is useful to know what emotion means first. The concept of emotion refers to acute responses to emerging threats or opportunities, as flexibly coordinated changes in experience, behavior or physiology. Emotions are our psychological and physiological reactions that arise spontaneously as a result of our experiences. That is, emotions are not achieved or obtained. Emotions cannot be a goal or a goal. Emotions are lived and experienced. We feel an emotion as a result of the situations and events we experience in life. Emotions are signals that tell us we like or dislike something.

The most important function of emotions is to keep us alive. Emotions enable us to survive individually in the face of threats.

Emotions that are defined as negative are generally thought of as unwanted herbs that grow in our garden. We think that our garden would be much more beautiful without them. We should not forget that these negative feelings are indispensable for our survival. If we did not feel emotions such as fear and anxiety, we would not run away from an oncoming car. We wouldn't hesitate to touch something hot. So, in a way, these emotions are our alarm systems that allow us to understand what is going on and keep us alive.

We can feel happiness or physiological comfort when we eat a delicious meal, we can feel happy when we see someone we love, we can get excited when we think of going to a new place, we can feel sad or angry when something we do not want. Sometimes thoughts cause emotions, sometimes behaviors and physiological symptoms can reveal emotions. For example, we may become excited or worried when we notice our heart rate speeding up. We can also feel sad when we think we can't just do something without experiencing it. We can get angry when someone hits us.

We can say that it is just as important, even more important, that emotions show what we want and what we like, as well as what we do not want. Trying to escape from these negative feelings can be the biggest "evil" we do to ourselves. Avoiding emotions will cause those emotions to become stronger. That is, they will not be able to perform their functions. When our emotions show that things are not going well somewhere, if we ignore it or try to suppress it with things like alcohol, overeating, drug use, working too much, excessive shopping, we cannot understand what is going on and fix what we cannot understand or realize. Although such methods may seem to provide temporary relief, the violence of unmet emotions will continue to affect our lives negatively. Processing bias towards verbal anxiety and distraction from mental images is negatively reinforced in the short term as it reduces negative emotion and arousal. But in the longer run, it inhibits emotional processing of the material, causing more distress.

When we don't listen to our feelings or when we deal with these feelings, we actually burn our volcanic mountain with the methods that we think are good.

So what should we do with our “negative” emotions?

First of all, we must recognize our emotion. Ask ourselves, “How am I feeling right now?” We can start by asking. After recognizing our emotion, we should focus on the thoughts, feelings and behaviors that we need to analyze. What do I feel when I think or what do I feel? What does this feeling that I have over and over again tell me? How can I deal with this feeling? What should I do differently? We can move forward with functional questions like these.

In addition to these feelings, we should also focus on our feelings that we see as “positive”. While the feelings that we think are not good for us draw our attention, we sometimes neglect the ones that are good. Studies indicate that successful regulation of positive emotions provides greater well-being, social support, and life satisfaction, while also creating buffers against stress, negative emotions and depressive episodes. In this way, we can reinforce our positive feelings. Only in this way is it possible to truly “feel good”.

I wish you a day when you listen to all your feelings!