What's really frightening in having a secret relationship was when it was discovered and get a hurtful words from your family, that can really affect your thinking.
My relationship with Kun was smooth sailing and still safe. It has a lot of "Kilig moments." Even though we are not talking in person coz my shyness is stopping me from meeting, as in talking holding hands or kissing, lol. But we didn't get to that point off course, I'm a "Dalagang Pilipina" and I am not yet ready to give my first kiss just to hmm, lol.
And even if our relationship was more on texting, it's still okay for me as long as we are communicating. I also want to meet with him and talk then bond but I just can't aside from the reason I mention above, I am also afraid that my Mom will discover our relationship. And I don't like that, I am still not ready to face her wrath. There's a reason why I am so afraid to her. When she gets mad she will really show it to me using her iron fist.
There is this one time, I am on the comfort room, doing some business. Even when I am on the c.r my phone was with me. I don't leave it on my room or just leave it on the table. It was always with me, in my pocket or in my bag. I was busy texting when suddenly the door opened.
And that time I was texting with him and talking some things. By the way, we call each other "Honey" or "Hon" that was our call sign. You all know that right? It was really "in" that time that call sign thingy. In our Clan we really use that always as in it is required, I don't know why tho.
So, the just suddenly open and I was like 😳😱🤪. I can't explain what I'm feeling that time. I feel like my heart will burst in nervousness and my armpit is really sweating, while my hand, nanlamig mga dzai. There's no use in hiding my cellphone coz she already saw me using it. And I receive an earful from her, good thing is she believe on my alibi and didn't check my phone. Coz if she check it in that moment, then I'm dead now lol.
So because of that happenings, I become extra careful on using my phone, I don't use our call sign when I'm at home. I change his name to a girls name, I'm sure I'm not the only one who do that strategy here lol, for the sake of LOVE! Lol. I forgot the name I used for him but it's a very girly name lol.
So we tills continue our secret love affair, but if before I will smile at him very often in school when our eyes will meet, after that encounter with my Mom in the C.r I don't do it often na. Or if I will smile at him, I will make sure first that no one is watching, that's how paranoid I was back then.
And then something happened that force me to make a choice, decide and end our relationship. My love for him is not that you know, where I will runaway with my boyfriend or elope with him just to continue our love story. I don't love him that much, I am not into the point where I will apply to myself that "hahamakin ang lahat masunod lang nais," gahh, no way. I don't have the guts to do that and my love for him is not that deep so I made a choice.
What really happen is, nothing really happen. I mean, it's all my fault that they almost discover it. No, no, they really didn't discover it....
We went to my other Mom's sister house. I can't remember if it's her birthday or what basta dumalaw kami don. Then after eating our Lunch, we all sit on the terrace to you know bond and talk. I don't know how it happened but suddenly, my Mom's niece suddenly ask me if I have a boyfriend na already. I didn't answer that question but I'm tempted to answer "No Comment" to her, she's so nosy.
But she continue teasing me and then Mom suddenly join on our convo and said, "If she has a boyfriend now then I will make her stop in her study, why continue study? You have a boyfriend now then go with him."
I don't know what to feel that time, I feel like she will discover my secret love affair any moment that time. I am not reacting but I really want to run that time and burst into tears. I just let them speak and do nothing.
But maybe because of different emotions I am feeling that time, from guilt, fear, I'm also with my other mom's niece I want to shove her face in a boiling water. It's because of her that's why I was in into that situation, if not of her nosiness I'm sure we are still in a relationship in the next next day.
I can't stop my emotions that time and suddenly I just burst into tears. I feel like in that moment, they got my answer, wether I have a boyfriend or nah. I just let my tears fall, I am so ashame that after that encounter I decided to end my relationship with Kun. I didn't put much thought on it, I just want everything to end and stop my suffering.
After we get home, Mom didn't confront me or ask questions on me. I don't know, just nothing. And I am thankful to that coz I don't want to talk about it. Kun ask me about why I'm breaking up with him, I just said I don't like him na and I want to focus on my study na and I don't want any distraction. But the truth is, there is nothing like that, lol I am lazy when it comes to studying so that's impossible.
Everything went back to normal, I have nothing to hide anymore. I am back from myself like nothing happened. I didn't sulk or whatever, and napatunayan ko na diko naman talaga sya ganon kagusto. Months after it she found a new girl na din, and good for him coz he don't need to hide their relationship. The last time I saw them was they have a baby na. The decision I made that time is really the best, coz they found each other and now they have their Happily Ever After.
Even if we didn't end up together I'm still happy with my life and that's the beat decision I have ever made. If ever I will go back to that time, I will still choose the decision I made that day. What if I choose a different path that time, I am sure I will not discover this read.cash and my new found friend here and I will never be here.
Thank You for reading, I hope you didn't get bored reading this lol.
This story is base on my own story that happen when I was just a teenager. Enjoy and Good Day.
I had a ton of secret affairs while in college tho. Only met some of them just to try and see if it would work. Would go out for lunch or dinner cuz i always had really late classes. Mom never found out UwU