Time fly really fast, I feel like it was just yesterday when I am still running around on our house playing with my friends. I will go home late after a non stop playing with dirt that was attach on my shirt and my face. With fears in my body thinking that Mom is waiting for me with a stick or a hanger in her hands.
Childhood memories, I don't have much of good memories because my late Mom, I mean my Auntie's partner before was so strict to the point that I am not allowed to go outside that often. Maybe it is because when I go home after a long playtime, they need to clean me up always as my clothes and my face has dirt all over.
She's strict but very kind, she's specially kind to my real Mom. Well, I'm not saying that my Auntie's partner now is not kind but, she's kind off stiff. She's not that kind but not that too bad also, she's in the middle yes. Anyway, I just can't help myself but to remember my childhood days that's why I'm sharing it here. But this is not my real topic today.
This is just about me having a thought of my dreams that still unfulfilled, and now I am thinking that, can I still do it? I'm not that really old but I feel like I am being left behind, you know that feeling? Others are busy flying their plane and just traveling all around the world while me, I'm not even preparing to fly. If some already travel half of the world, me? Not even moving because of the broken engine.
I have a lot of dreams for myself, as a girl who only live on the four corner of my room I have a lot of dreams that I want to do once I decided to go out of my shell. But for now, I have to set aside that because I'm still thinking for what's the best for my family. I just can't leave them you know. I tried it once but once I heard something is going on to my Auntie, I immediately run back to our home.
What I felt that time when I heard the news was overwhelming for me. I feel like my heart will burst out off my chesf because of fears that something might happen to my Auntie. She's not my real Mom but I love her, she's the one who give me a gift that anyone can't take away from me (wala naman talagang mananakaw, limot ko na nga inaral ko noon lol). Well, she work hard for my future and I am thankful for that. I'm just hoping that soon, I will be able to give her the life that I wish for her, for them, for my family to give them back the good thing that they did for me.
That's why, while I waiting for that right time. I will just enjoy myself here in read.cash and enjoy the privilege that this site are giving to me. And that is to, earn BCH, learn more about it, and HODL it and wait for the best time. Someday, all of my dreams will come true, I will do everything that I didn't do before. I will enjoy my freedom together with myself.
I will be independent and live my life to the fullest and enjoy every time that I have. I'll start it with looking for a job, I really want to experience that. Find a bestfriend that will be my companion in my journey. Enjoy the things that I never done before, sleep with my bestfriend house and spend the night watching KDrama's, Anime or Hollywood movie. It's my long wish to have a sleepover with my besties lol, lame but I never really experience those. And most importantly, go to the bar and go crazy, just once. And then will do a lot of mechievous thing that every bestfriend do, lol.
I have a lot more but I won't list it all here coz 10 page of bond paper is not enough to finish it all lol.
Even if I get old waiting, I will just sit here and wait for that right time, coz after all "You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream" as C.S. Lewis said.
February 22, 2021
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