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@Ruffa more from that month

It Must Be Nice Being Perfect I just suddenly thought of my teenage days when I am still fit or should I say malnourished? Lol. I never got bullied naman before even if my body is so thin like isang ihip lang ng hangin, I will be washed away everywhere, lol. Nope good thing my classmates before is not like that. Maybe it is also because they can see me on how much I munch my foods. I love foods even before but I just don't can't get fat. I think that's what everyone is wishing too before, to look thin.

[****Image Source****] https://www.google.com/search?q=thinly+thin+body&oq=thinly+thin+body&aqs=chrome..69i57j33i160l3.9272j1j4&client=ms-android-oppo-rvo2&sourceid=chrome-mobile&ie=UTF-8#imgrc=AxDeO2qbqAoeuM Maybe they thought that being super thin is pretty and sexy but I tell yah, it is not. I look like a sick kid before because I was too thin. My face is too long and my lips, you can see it naman when you get thinner in your face and lips. The round face will look like a shape of rice and the lips is too big than when you smile it is not appealing at all. This just base on my experience okay. That is what I look like before. I want to put my picture here but nevermind, lol. It's too ugly so let's move on. I never get bullied yes but there are times that when someone commented that I really look thin I can't help myself but to think that "it's not like I want this kind of body you know." They didn't make it sound na na they are judging me maybe they are just saying it out of concern but, what to do. Even though I ate a lot my body will never really get fat. I also hate being thin because of this I get caught easily of something. I will list what are those. I **get** cold easily Oh yes, even if it's just a little bit chilly outside I feel cold already. Mom will even say to me that it js too hot so why I'm on my sweater. I will just say that I'm cold and I can't take the coldness that is why. They will just look at me like I am some weird species on the planet earth. They just can't believe that I said it even if it's already hot for them lol. While I am shaking already from the cold weather Moms on the other hand is doing nothing because to them that kind of weather is what they prefer, lol. I always have a cough I remember I always have a cough and I even feel sometimes that my lungs will give up on me already. It is also due to the cold weather that is why. Other reason is whenever I drink cold water eat some sweets like chocolate, candies. That is why I hate that I am so mapayat before. I feel like I am the most sickly kid that exist on planet earth. I can't even enjoy cold drinks, I can't even eat chocolate or even candies and I have to really watch what I eat because if not, aigooo. That's my darkest day tbh. I am weak Yes, I am weak as I easily get exhausted even doing light things. This is just after I finish college. Sometimes just getting a water from the water pump I will feel out of breath easily. Like even walking from a not so far away place, I will feel out of breath again. What I felt that time is like I run for miles that's why I feel exhausted. I maybe lack of exercise too that time but even doing that is bit too much work for me. This is also because of my nose too as I can only breath on my mouth. I don't want to go back into that time where I can't even be any of use to anyone. But after removing what's inside on my nose year 2017 I think, everything go back to normal again. I can already eat sweet food and drink cold drink like softdrink but I still have to watch out my intake coz If I have too much, ah expect it to happen again. And I have a lot of fats now, hihi -- Although I always got called "Payat" it's okay with me coz I am really payat. I just can't stop feeling sad sometimes coz I know it already so why slap it to my face like I am unaware of it. And it's not like I am not doing anything with my body so no need to tell me. Aigooo. Those are just my memory when I am still thin. But now I have a so so healthy body and haha I also need to do something about it, lol. How about you? For sure you also have that "Payat" days. How is it? June 16, 2022 --

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