The part I never liked.

Sometimes in life people feel it's their right and privilege to make people do things in their own favour, they feel it's in your own interest to always give and give at all times to them, making them to be at the receiving end at every moment you are with them in a relationship. They don't ever thing it's also a two way thing where everyone do their own very best to give and contribute for the growth and success of the relationship which they agree to start as couple.

Why most marriages and relationships turn out soar in most cases in our society of late are as a result of the type of ideology and mindset the persons involved had before coming together to start a relationship. Some ladies usually feel once you are the one that went to them for a relationship, it's your duty to provide all their responsibilities as you being the man and as someone that really went after them. You will see a situation where the man that saw a girl he loves and went after her, after getting to know each other and she gives you that acceptance to be in relationship with you, the next minute every of the her needs and wants automatically becomes the man's responsibility to cater for.

When you ask some of the ladies why they relinquish all their responsibilities to that man in their life, they will simply tell you "my dear don't you know it's your responsibility to cater for your woman's need", some will even go further to tell you that "it's money that they use in maintaining a woman". And these words when I hear some ladies respond in that manner I usually get confused and Speechless.

I ask myself these questions;

Does it mean if one wants to get a good love and relationship it must be based on money?

Does it mean the reason for being in a relationship with your spouse simply for taking care of your own responsibilities and needs when ever you need them by your spouse?

Does it mean a lady can not take care of her needs by herself?

Secondly, I have also come to understand and observe that most men also feel it's the sole responsibility of their partner to always cook dinner, lunch and even breakfast for them, serve them food, clean the dishes and the house, etc when ever they are together in a house. Some Men in relationship have this entitlement mentality that they hold unto when ever they are with their partner and they feel it's normal and their right to receive such treatment from their female partner. As funny as it may sound, these types of character and situations are seen in most relationships and I feel in my own opinion that it's not actually supposed to be allowed to happen, as a man in a relationship, your female partner is not your slave nor your maid that always do your bidding at all times. Sometimes you help your partner to do some chores in the house, cook and even do the dishes because if you truly understand the meaning relationship, it's simply for companionship where you help each other to be happy and safe in each other's arm.

Also there is this particular character I usually notice in some persons who are in a relationship, individually you feel it's your right to act irrational at any given opportunity and moment when ever you are with your partner without considering how the other person will feel. You feel it's your right to show tantrums and your partner should not complain nor feel bad about it, but if your partner wakes up one morning and act the same way you start to get angry and feel bad just because he or she was the one that acted that way instead of you.

You feel he or she supposed not to get angry and misunderstand you each time you show some weird attitudes towards your partner, even when your partner show that dismay feeling  or wear a sad face towards you because of the tantrums you displayed at him or her, you forget that you caused the reason why your spouse is angry due to your attitude, instead you get angry at your partner for being angry or showing his or her sad feelings for the way you acted.

In your different relationship moments with your partners, you may notice one or two weird characters that are not suitable to you and you try to live with it, it's not that these characters are actually the right way of living in a relationship, you choose to live with it because you feel you can deal with it. Indirectly It's affect the love you have for your spouse.

But the right understanding should be taken into consideration for a healthy relationship. You should understand that your spouse is not your slave nor your money bag that is meant to do everything for you, I am not saying if your partner feels he or she wants to take care of your needs at all times is a bad thing, what I am saying is that it should be on your partner personal acceptance to cater for you and your needs not on your command or dictates.

Also it's important that you see your partner as yourself, learn to give each other support in all things, no need of having to feel he or she owes you an entitlement or a responsibility of serving you at all times.

To actually feel true love from your spouse, you really need to be real and don't have to feel you are doing a favour to your spouse for accepting to date him or her. Learn to love and see your partner as yourself. I know you can't hurt yourself if you really love yourself.

Thank you for your time. Rafd9828.....