CHARACTERS
People across the world have distinctive characters and just like Star Signs, they act, think, and look alike.
Each have special nicknames according to their behaviors.
Next up we have THE MALE LEMON, is this you?
Meet: The Male LEMON
You will have a surprise in store when you first meet Lemon, he looks more like a television character from an adventure series than a ‘building industry worker’ an occupation that suits his ‘outdoorsy’ disposition. To totally characterize him you could say he looks like a rather podgy, worn and washed-out Tarzan, normally blond or red, he wears his hair long enough for a pony-tail for the intrepid look he goes for, but the hair and tail looks greasy and is almost certainly sweaty. He has rebellious, blazing eyes (typically blue) that are blood-shot through too much booze and late nights and of course he doesn’t sleep well, his heart knocks unpredictably around in his chest all night long and totally due to his drinking habits where he had more alcohol than blood coursing through his veins.
The lips are spoilt by dryness and an incredibly surly disposition brought on by enforced working conditions and co-workers. His physique, once in the blurred past had the potential of a track athlete or cyclist but that was a million bottles ago, now it’s obvious he habitually strays from the healthy path and into the cracks and crevices of pubs and off-beat drinking holes, existence without booze is not life worth living to Lemon, to corroborate this fact he has a noticeable pot-belly which sits like a hernia beneath his chest, not a pretty sight on such a lanky frame.
He does however have a few redeeming features left, one of them is ‘his legs,’ if he was an animal (and sometimes distinction is not noticeable), he would be a racehorse, the legs are remarkable and if you never thought you would be attracted by a solitary set of legs then you haven’t met Lemon yet, one can feel the irresistible energy of his legs as he stands next to you, long, muscular and hairy, they go all the way up and beyond his very miniscule shorts and they seem to have a mind of their own as his legs flirt with you, a phenomena you will find disturbing and just a little weird.
His skin is tanned, ruddy and rough, through long hours in the sun and even longer hours at the bar and sadly he reveals a most repulsive ‘bull frog’ chin because of his excesses, you could say a good specimen gone determinedly down the drain with nay a pause to the onward plunge. He wears colorful (Hawaii-like) short-sleeved shirts with tight shorts, long game-rangy socks and boots which accessorize his best feature perfectly, his legs and his bum.
Lemon believes garlic, eaten in unreasonably enormous quantities will alleviate all his problems, such as hangovers, high blood pressure, headaches, bad eyesight and dizziness, but unbeknown to him, (or maybe he knows and doesn’t care) all it gives him is reeking bad breath and try as you will to explain to him it’s the alcohol responsible for these disorders and if he quit his drinking all his maladies will go away literally overnight, he will agree with you emphatically and as soon as he leaves your company he will continue along his ruinous path with renewed gusto and determination. STUBBORN is Lemon’s last name!
In contrast, if you can possibly get beyond all this boorishness, he really has a fabulous personality, and his gravel voice is quite sexy. When he shares a joke with you his blazing eyes will twinkle quite attractively. Unfortunately, what he shows the world is a rough and ready character and essentially lazy, he likes nothing better than to sit and watch his favorite sport and booze it up with friends while he gets rolling drunk and he can be an extraordinary uncivilized and coarse drunkard with a crude streak. There is also a very brusque side to Lemon that leaves most people stupefied when he tells them his opinion about the job or about them, he can’t stand most people and lacking any sense of propriety he couldn’t care less if they are aware of this or not. Lemon also hates his co-workers with something akin to manslaughter and many occasions he almost gives himself a heart attack with fury during a full throttle yelling and bellowing rage. The workers reckon he is a liar, a fraud, and a lazy man yet they can’t help respecting him because they are all exactly the same. Of course, they hate this sort of treatment but just shake their heads and put it down to women and booze and he is certainly their sole topic of conversation, they never get tired of mimicking him and often get to laughing so hard they require support. This merriment is looked forward to and as Lemon is their relief from an otherwise laborious and boring job, they respect him for what he is and how he doesn’t give a damn about a hell of a lot of things.
Lemon usually owns a pick-up which gets his personal attention and joy-riding is at the rung just below boozing on the top of his rather short ladder, how he yearns for a new double cab but never quite makes it, there are invariably too many accounts to pay and of course his pub account is in the thousands. Lemon will never be a wealthy man, as his ambition has gone down the toilet along with the booze he pours down his throat but his retirement is looked forward to and it should be a substantial package as Lemon stays in the same job for most of his life, as he does in the same home, and using that exemplar one can only speculate rather gloomily about his past, present and future.
He has specific ways in which HE does things and will make this known to you right from the start of your meeting him and if you try and convince him otherwise, “stuff you!” He doesn’t consider what others say of great importance and never listens to them besides and of course he never minces his words, if he thinks you look as rough as a dog’s ball, then that is exactly what he says to your face and if you get testy about it he really doesn’t care, offending people does give him some kind of wicked pleasure which only he understands.
At home Lemon, funnily enough likes his partner to look like a gentlewoman, feminine, modest and refined, in fact exactly the opposite to the way he himself looks and behaves. However, this perfect woman, must come equipped with a constitution made of allied steel to live under the same roof with Lemon although he is not usually married or for any length of time, ‘commitment,’ is not a high priority, Lemon comes and goes as he pleases don’t complicate his life, he is a simple man with simple needs. Sadly, he doesn’t talk much about himself, because he is interesting and highly amusing, yet he remains a mystery in his past, but he is quick to tell you in the present what he likes to drink and where he likes to go to drink it.
He is a captivating and intelligent man with a stimulating, virile temperament you don’t find much anymore but tragically, he has lost the art of subtlety and consequently will ask insulting and mostly discourteous questions which have you miffed and offended in no time at all and even before you have a chance to recover and reply he will supply his own answers (usually derogatory) as he regards you sourly. Sentimentality embarrasses him, along with hugs and kisses, a sensitive and tender lover he may be but considering his tactless temperament it could be a rather plain-spoken affair with candid directions and blunt instructions and not recommended for the faint-hearted.
CHARACTERS People across the world have distinctive characters and just like Star Signs, they act, think, and look alike.
Each have special nicknames according to their behaviors.
Next up we have THE MALE LEMON, is this you?
Meet: The Male LEMON
You will have a surprise in store when you first meet Lemon, he looks more like a television character from an adventure series than a ‘building industry worker’ an occupation that suits his ‘outdoorsy’ disposition. To totally characterize him you could say he looks like a rather podgy, worn and washed-out Tarzan, normally blond or red, he wears his hair long enough for a pony-tail for the intrepid look he goes for, but the hair and tail looks greasy and is almost certainly sweaty. He has rebellious, blazing eyes (typically blue) that are blood-shot through too much booze and late nights and of course he doesn’t sleep well, his heart knocks unpredictably around in his chest all night long and totally due to his drinking habits where he had more alcohol than blood coursing through his veins.
The lips are spoilt by dryness and an incredibly surly disposition brought on by enforced working conditions and co-workers. His physique, once in the blurred past had the potential of a track athlete or cyclist but that was a million bottles ago, now it’s obvious he habitually strays from the healthy path and into the cracks and crevices of pubs and off-beat drinking holes, existence without booze is not life worth living to Lemon, to corroborate this fact he has a noticeable pot-belly which sits like a hernia beneath his chest, not a pretty sight on such a lanky frame.
He does however have a few redeeming features left, one of them is ‘his legs,’ if he was an animal (and sometimes distinction is not noticeable), he would be a racehorse, the legs are remarkable and if you never thought you would be attracted by a solitary set of legs then you haven’t met Lemon yet, one can feel the irresistible energy of his legs as he stands next to you, long, muscular and hairy, they go all the way up and beyond his very miniscule shorts and they seem to have a mind of their own as his legs flirt with you, a phenomena you will find disturbing and just a little weird.
His skin is tanned, ruddy and rough, through long hours in the sun and even longer hours at the bar and sadly he reveals a most repulsive ‘bull frog’ chin because of his excesses, you could say a good specimen gone determinedly down the drain with nay a pause to the onward plunge. He wears colorful (Hawaii-like) short-sleeved shirts with tight shorts, long game-rangy socks and boots which accessorize his best feature perfectly, his legs and his bum.
Lemon believes garlic, eaten in unreasonably enormous quantities will alleviate all his problems, such as hangovers, high blood pressure, headaches, bad eyesight and dizziness, but unbeknown to him, (or maybe he knows and doesn’t care) all it gives him is reeking bad breath and try as you will to explain to him it’s the alcohol responsible for these disorders and if he quit his drinking all his maladies will go away literally overnight, he will agree with you emphatically and as soon as he leaves your company he will continue along his ruinous path with renewed gusto and determination. STUBBORN is Lemon’s last name!
In contrast, if you can possibly get beyond all this boorishness, he really has a fabulous personality, and his gravel voice is quite sexy. When he shares a joke with you his blazing eyes will twinkle quite attractively. Unfortunately, what he shows the world is a rough and ready character and essentially lazy, he likes nothing better than to sit and watch his favorite sport and booze it up with friends while he gets rolling drunk and he can be an extraordinary uncivilized and coarse drunkard with a crude streak. There is also a very brusque side to Lemon that leaves most people stupefied when he tells them his opinion about the job or about them, he can’t stand most people and lacking any sense of propriety he couldn’t care less if they are aware of this or not. Lemon also hates his co-workers with something akin to manslaughter and many occasions he almost gives himself a heart attack with fury during a full throttle yelling and bellowing rage. The workers reckon he is a liar, a fraud, and a lazy man yet they can’t help respecting him because they are all exactly the same. Of course, they hate this sort of treatment but just shake their heads and put it down to women and booze and he is certainly their sole topic of conversation, they never get tired of mimicking him and often get to laughing so hard they require support. This merriment is looked forward to and as Lemon is their relief from an otherwise laborious and boring job, they respect him for what he is and how he doesn’t give a damn about a hell of a lot of things.
Lemon usually owns a pick-up which gets his personal attention and joy-riding is at the rung just below boozing on the top of his rather short ladder, how he yearns for a new double cab but never quite makes it, there are invariably too many accounts to pay and of course his pub account is in the thousands. Lemon will never be a wealthy man, as his ambition has gone down the toilet along with the booze he pours down his throat but his retirement is looked forward to and it should be a substantial package as Lemon stays in the same job for most of his life, as he does in the same home, and using that exemplar one can only speculate rather gloomily about his past, present and future.
He has specific ways in which HE does things and will make this known to you right from the start of your meeting him and if you try and convince him otherwise, “stuff you!” He doesn’t consider what others say of great importance and never listens to them besides and of course he never minces his words, if he thinks you look as rough as a dog’s ball, then that is exactly what he says to your face and if you get testy about it he really doesn’t care, offending people does give him some kind of wicked pleasure which only he understands.
At home Lemon, funnily enough likes his partner to look like a gentlewoman, feminine, modest and refined, in fact exactly the opposite to the way he himself looks and behaves. However, this perfect woman, must come equipped with a constitution made of allied steel to live under the same roof with Lemon although he is not usually married or for any length of time, ‘commitment,’ is not a high priority, Lemon comes and goes as he pleases don’t complicate his life, he is a simple man with simple needs. Sadly, he doesn’t talk much about himself, because he is interesting and highly amusing, yet he remains a mystery in his past, but he is quick to tell you in the present what he likes to drink and where he likes to go to drink it.
He is a captivating and intelligent man with a stimulating, virile temperament you don’t find much anymore but tragically, he has lost the art of subtlety and consequently will ask insulting and mostly discourteous questions which have you miffed and offended in no time at all and even before you have a chance to recover and reply he will supply his own answers (usually derogatory) as he regards you sourly. Sentimentality embarrasses him, along with hugs and kisses, a sensitive and tender lover he may be but considering his tactless temperament it could be a rather plain-spoken affair with candid directions and blunt instructions and not recommended for the faint-hearted.