Who Am I?

The problem with making a major change is that it forces you to look at things differently, including yourself.

For the past 14 years, I've been a wife. For the past 9 years, I've been a mom. Before that I was a sister and a daughter.

I'm still a sister and a daughter. Even if I don't talk to one of my parents. I'm still a mom even though my daughter isn't with me full time anymore.

I'm not a wife anymore. I spent so many years focusing on others, 24/7 it was about someone else. Never me. I threw myself into trying to be a good mother, constantly doubting everything I did. I did my best to make my marriage work, always fighting against the tide even after I realized it was a lost cause.

I tried because I didn't know what else to do. Giving up felt like failure. Giving up meant letting go of something that at the very least kept me busy.

I have a loving and supportive boyfriend now. He makes me happier than I have been in a long time. My ex and I get along which makes things easier.

The only problem is that such a drastic change throws something into sharp relief. I have no idea who I am anymore. So much of my identity was focused on the people around me. On being what they needed.

Now that I have the time and support to find myself, I'm not sure where to start.