Angry and frustrated by what she told me, I decided to write an article. I stared at the empty sheet in front of me and put my ink on it but nothing aside what she was saying was on my mind. I sat down for a while, some second, minutes and hours passed by still nothing. I couldn't make such thoughts about what she said vanish.
I decided to give up and sit on the floor. Tears filled my eyes since all that she said was true but it wasn't my fault either. It pains to know that what I was planning is nuisance to other people . I closed my eyes to sleep so I could forget all these thoughts but I couldn't sleep. I was restless, worried and couldn't get myself out of the situation.
She came from the market vexed and yelling. "Hey you, why didn't you write the list accordingly? You left the most important things out of the list, why didn't you go buy the things that I told you to buy?"
I was confused by why she was yelling. But I held on because I could see the anger in her eyes. I started unpacking the things she brought but she was not satisfied with the yelling.
She's one of those that will always not support you unless it is in their advantage. She continuously says she loves me that is why she doesn't want to do something to hurt me, but all I think about her is that, she only thinks about money and nothing else. She will push me to stay in the shop from morning to evening. She has made me lonely since she won't improve that I talk to friends making me anti-social. She'll always be complaining that I don't think about her and I do things my own way whether it will hurt her or not.
One think she does wrong is, She only puts all her eggs in one basket which is the store and does not want to think otherwise. She always wants to be a leader and me to be a follower but that is not how it always works.
While I was on the floor thinking about what I could do to get myself distracted, I had nothing. . I decided to think about the differences between my mom and I and what was causing the misunderstanding.
"Coming from an average family in our community, we strive harder to be able to get something to eat. No pain, no gain is mostly our slogan and as such, my mom and I work tirelessly to make a living. One difference between us is, she doesn't like to spend. When you ask her for something, since her shop is more important to her, she will rather use the money to buy things for the shop than to give it to you. I also think the store is not the only source of income she could get. Skills is one hell of a payment method . With something small and within a short period of time, you can really make a lot of money. So I also decide to spend on myself and make myself better so I can make her happy in future but she wouldn't listen.
She was actually vexed when I told her I don't want the profession she want them to choose but got happy when I told her that I would not continue my education. She knew her money would rest and she wouldn't be spending on me again. She's trying hard to protect herself and make money from the shop but ine thing she doesn't realize is that, the store is falling apart
Things are really becoming expensive and their costs are climbing up steadily. It has made a lot of people stop buying to conserve their money. This is what I see and decide to correct but she keeps talking. Why was she yelling? She thinks she has realized a steady drop in the money I send home as sales everyday and as such things I am the cause. She wouldn't buy for me so why ask is always the question I asked myself whenever I need something . She complains the store is getting empty as the days pass by and that where does the money pass?
Me on the other hand use some amounts of her money to help myself learn; to buy tools and accessories that are really necessary in my aim of building a great foundation and skill for myself.
That is what I use the money to do. Is it wrong investing in myself ? Will she disapprove when I'm being hired because of my skills in a company to work where I can earn more money to take care of myself and her? It is quite appalling and awkward as she thinks I am the only hoarding the money in my accounts like it was rice or beans. But truth be told ,I do no such thing. Her complaints are partly true. Yes, I do take her money but what can I do to make it right?
A child confronted me as his most trusted friend and asked me this question after such a narration . What do you think I should tell the child ?
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Based on my own opinion, frustration and anger is the hindrance why we keep on experiencing depression and its not good for us.
Im new here :) pls support