Modern Loneliness

"Modern loneliness, we're never alone
But always depressed, yeah
Love my friends to death
But I never call and I never text, yeah"--Lauv

Have you heard this song? And do you relate?

Trigger Warning. Don't read.

Some time long ago, when most of people do not have all access with android phones and used to have phones with keypad. I used to love texting, joining clubs, group messaging. I used to accept calls, responds to all messages and be the ones to message first. Aside from that everything used to be fun. Have you done that? But as years passed by, everything turned out, different. It is true that the one you love before can be either you love the same or you love it never. Because interests changes, gradually, unpreventful and sometimes can be forgotten.

"Modern loneliness were never alone but always depressed" Have you felt that? Sometimes there is a never ending loud noises on your head but its silent. Something empty. Something you do not want to feel. Attacking differently. You know there are people around you, willing to listen, willing to understand but you just don't know if they will, and you think they don't, and will never understand. Because something deeper beyond those loud noises something is broken, burdened and until you realized that sharing will make better than worst, it will never end. And you know that, but the fear is greater than relief. So you choose to stay in the dark. And all these empty phrases, empty messages you know the opposite of dark is light, and when will you ever see that?

"And I've been trying to find a reason to get up
Been trying to find a reason for this stuff
In my bedroom and my closet
The baggage in my heart is still so dark"

Have you noticed the differences when you wake up, and you feel that you have energy through out to continue in a day versus you felt the pang in your inner self that is huge and empty you don't want to move. Just lay down the bed. And feel the darkest of the dark. And you want to get rid of that, you don't want to stay like that. You push your self to move, read more good verses. Find reason to continue, but it isn't always like that. And why is that? Why do you feel like that? Why all of a sudden silent voices became your friend. And if you haven't recognized that you'll always be there. And you know that. Or did you not?

Hmmn this is just my view of the song. And sometimes I can relate into the feeling. Sometimes it wasn't because your lazy, or you lack of motivation, or you don't asked guidance from above, but there is deeper beyond that. Hurting, painful and it helps me to release these toxic feeling through writing. And eventually a bad day isn't as bad as it seem. And the energy is renewed. Here If you ever wanna listen to the song, I paste here the link. Let me share your views about it..

May is the month of flowers :) Let your beauty blossomed in the summer of May. Sorry if this is kinda off.

Hope you did not read this!

• Lead image is screenshot from the music video attached came from youtube.