Loving you Silently

[Fiction]

I'd rather choose to love you in silence than seeing you walking away after I confess my feelings. I know that I should have a courage to tell you the truth, that my feelings for you is greater than friends. But I can't afford to lose you because of my impulsive decision. It's not worth it to fight for you because we both know that you are in love with someone else. The girl that you wished for so long. I'm happy seeing you happy with her but I can't deny the fact that I also imagining what if we are the one who is in love with each other? Loving you in distance is much better because at least I can't experience rejection from the person I've last the most.

They say that break up is the most painful in a relationship but did you ever experienced one sided love? Maybe it is not counted as a relationship because you are the only one who have feelings for him. But bro, it's another level of pain. You are stuck between two options: stay with him as his friend or distance from him because you can't take it anymore. Both of them is painful that can gradually destroy you. If you stay with him, you need to bare seeing him with another girl. Talking to him as if you didn't feel hurt at all. On the other side if you choose to stay away, there's a chance that you can't no longer talk to him. You became a stranger to each other. So what would you choose, to be a martyr or to be hopeless romantic?

But on my side, I choose to be a martyr. Just like what I've said, I can't afford to lose you so I choose to stay even it's a torture for me. It's an emotional damage especially when you asking my help to buy gifts or to surprise your girl. In this love story,I'm just a mere sidekick of the prince. I choose to suffer and love you I'm loneliness. I'm proud of you because you really know how to treat your woman like a queen. But I wished that I am that one you've searching for every minute. I'm also pitied myself because I keep involve myself to you. Reality slaps me for many times that we can't be together but here I am, still waiting for your recognition. I'm still waiting for you to tell that you also love me. It will never happened because in your eyes, I'm just your bestfriend.

And the day that I avoided for since then happened. Earlier, you said to me that you want to settle with your girl. It seems that the cold ice was pouring at my whole body. I asked you if you really sure but I know that you are 100% sure. I'm the only one who is not ready to totally let you go. That moment,I want to say to you to stay and don't continue your plan because I love you. But no words cams from mouth because you deserve to be happy. You deserve to live your life. You deserve a woman who will love you the way you love her. Maybe it's the last time that I will hoping that you will love me back. It is the last day that I will cry because of you because tomorrow, I set you free even you are not totally mine. It doesn't mean that I will forget you because I'm still loving you silently. If somebody would asked about my status, I will tell them " I'm single but my heart is already taken for the person I can't call mine". I will not regret being selfless especially for you. Maybe, loving you silently is one of the stup*d thing I did in my life but I didn't regret doing that. I hope in our next life, we only live in my dreams because there, our relationship has no end. There, I don't need to keep all of this by myself because I'm your queen. I don't want to woke up but I think it's the best time for me to forward. I'm moving on but I'm still holding my promise to you that I will still pray and love you even in silence.

Greetings!!

Hello dreamers of read cash universe!! How's everyone here today? It's so nice to imagine especially when the weather is like this, so cold just like your relationship char haha. It's weekend again, time flies really fast right? But here I am,still thinking if I have any progress at all. Despite on the struggles you've encountered today, I hope that you are having a good time to rest for a while. It's okay if sometimes, we pause for a while in achieving our goals. I know that aiming for them is important but don't neglect your health okay? Let's still prioritize it above all..

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I also want to say Thank you to every dreamers who supports my journey here. To my awesome sponsors, lovely readers and commenters, Thank you for your warm motivation to me. I appreciate it a lot🤗