@Maryjacy 19 February 2022

Did I love him, or it's just an infatuation?

**Lead image** https://unsplash.com/photos/h0mKpP_DvWE Nowadays, I feel it's a trend to have a girlfriend or a boyfriend but surprisingly, I'm single and I'm hoping I will have one day. Sometimes I do wonder why I'm not in any relationship because all my friends have at least one. There was a boy in our class, his name is Francis, I have a feeling for him, but I'm the type of girl that doesn't like to share my feelings, the only person who knows how I feel was my friend Cecilia. **"He likes you too because I've noticed him staring at you,"** she said. Francis best friend always teases him in my presence, but he will never attempt talking to me. As days go on, my feelings for him become stronger, I just wish he could talk to me, I don't know if we'll both confess our liking for each other one day, seeing not seeing the possibility. A few days later, one of my classmates David asked me if I like Francis, I was dumbfounded, **"why asking, what was that?"** I managed to ask, **"anyways, mary, he's a nice guy, and I know you guys can be a perfect match"** he giggled. When I got home that day, I stared at myself in the mirror, no Mary, you don't seem to look perfect. I headed to my room, I cleaned up my face and I got my eyebrows done, should I trim my hair? " oh leave it" I said with excitement. Yes I'm over excited, but I'm not going to show this. " yeah I forget to call Cecilia, I'm sure she will be excited like me when I tell her what I head today" I gets to school the next day but David was absent, I felt sad about it, and it happened to be on Friday, just so sad to spend the weekend with disappointment. Saturday was somehow gloomy for me because I don't have the opportunity to see David on Friday. My mother took me to the market and I saw him, but I pretend I did not see him... **" Mary you're a fool, how can you be stupid? He smiled at you and you did not even bother to return it, Girrrrl, you deserve to be single"** Cecilia spanked me. I was angry with myself, but hopefully, on Monday, David will come around to make us meet. I was ready to meet Francis on Monday, and I was hoping to meet David in class, fortunately, he came to school, but I still pretend as if his absence means nothing and even pretend as if I don't want to see Francis. During or free time David came to me but he did not come alone. The voice I heard made my heart skip...

`" Hi Mary, I am Francis"` `Me: hem...hi, how are you?` `Him: yeah, as you can see, I'm fine, what about you?` `Me: hemm...fine (pause)` `Me: so?` `Him: like.....you wanted to talk with me?` `Me: me? Not at all, It was your friend David that told me you're single, I did not incite for this, but since he told me, I just want to give it a try... But excuse me, if you think I'm the one who called for this, it's not necessary( i' m I not stupid? what if he contradicts me at the same moments?)` `Him: hmmm, that's fine, likewise me, I did not tell him to approach you. But we can still be friends if you are okay with it. Can we?, (he asked)` `Me: Sure, I don't mind.` `Him: So can you tell me more about yourself, like I wish to know.`

That's how we started we started to talk to each other, and share different kinds of things. Sometimes I do wonder **" did I love him, or it's just an infatuation?, and I never can tell if he will ever confess his love, but I doubt it "** we become close friends but we both never accepted that we like each other but I will always appreciate David for making us come together as a friend, but my main point is that, who will be the first to say those magical words? Can I call this my first love? Is this how love happens? I don't know..... **....I am confused!** Thanks for your time. **These are my great sponsors, you can check on their blogs to behold the work of a greater .** `To my upvoters and subscriber, I cannot appreciate you all for your support always, you'll all remaining forever in my heart, never to be blurted out!` #maryjacycares💙