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This day is one of the days that I will never forget in my life, the day that I think will change my month, my year, or even my life. This August and September are not good for me, first infected by covid, broken monitor, quarantine, and everything in between. In short, I am having bad days lately and I`m getting sick of it, to the point that I said to myself that I don`t care what will happen next and I lost hope for me to see good days. As these kinds of days continue I lose hope and it gets dark and dark as the days go by, I feel like there`s nothing to make this okay or light again.
I don`t if it`s just me or what, but did you experienced it too? Every time that something good happens or something arrived and it makes me happy, it will be followed by something bad and terrible. Like when I buy my first ever computer, I am so happy about it and I used it every day and then weeks later the monitor broke and it takes almost a week to be replaced. And another example is when I get my first bike, I am so happy that I can go far and travel to mountains and different locations around Cavite (a province in Philippines), but a week or month later it started to act crazy. I replaced every part that is broken but it just breaks every time so I just stop cycling.
As I said it happens every time and I just lost care of what will happen next in my life. At first, when It happens I will curse a lot and my week or month will never be the same. I will feel so down and will lose interest in everything I am doing at that time. When it always happens it gets tiring and everything that you see will be negative all the time, and it is scary. Sometimes I`m at the point of emptiness, there`s nothing that surprises me, I am not laughing at anything and when I laugh, I will be surprised and get anxious about what will happen next. Many years I am like this, always anticipating what can happen next, or when will the heavens will struck me again.
Because it happen often almost 2 times a month, I just change how I look it. I did not curse when my Monitor broke I just take a deep breath and say " it`s just life". It`s kind of working for me, I just think that I`m still lucky and I just look at other things that I have. Sometimes I will say to myself that I am not only the one suffering moments like this, I know that many people suffer from this kind of situation and I hope it will just pass through.
In the beginning, I said that this day is different and it is a life-changer, let me tell the story from the start. On the night of September 17, 2021, I and my cousin chatting about how my dream come to waste and I just let it go and find another thing to do, and then he send a picture about bands and instrument. I watched it, and when I`m done I said that it feels like my dreams have been awakened by the video and I start being sad, but I did not tell him. On that same night, he asked me what kind of guitar I want if I will one, and I said the things that I love in a guitar, like the color, style, and even the materials it is made of, and he said okay. Once I am finished stating the things that I like in a guitar he just said that we have the same taste when it comes to a guitar.
That night I have no idea what will happen today. Early in the morning, he calls and we talk about the same thing we are talking about, like bands, guitar equipment, and our dream. He sent me a link for different software I can use when I have a guitar, and still I have no idea what will happen.
later that day he calls again and said that he send me a box of cookies and I should go outside because the rider is near. I went outside and wait for the cookies, and then the rider come and ask for my name. And he handed me a box and a note, the note said that I should start practicing and I must enjoy the gift from him and from my girlfriend.
I immediately call him and said what is happening and what is in the box and I even called my girlfriend and ask what is happening. And then a second delivery mand arrived, he ask what my name is and handed me a box shaped like a guitar. I was confused so I just called him and he said that I should keep my money because my health is not yet stable because of covid and him and my girlfriend bought me a guitar and a sound interface.
I`m in shock, I never receive a gift like this in my life, I did not show much emotion while we are on a call but as soon as the phone hangs up, I started crying. I said to myself that this day will never be forgotten and it will be a start of a new journey, a new part of my life that is yet to be written by me.
I`m so thankful for this gift since little I am dreaming to be an artist playing my music in front of many people, the kind of artist that will inspire other people to do good, to not give up and lose hope, a kind of artist that will change the world for good.