Life is a lot of ups and downs so naturally, all's well that ends well. In the first and second part of my story I mentioned what the pandemic eventually brought into my life. But now I can say my Lent has been truly fruitful indeed.
From unknowingly being misled by demons in Part 1, this 3rd part is what happened after watching the interviews I mentioned in Part 2. I definitely learned a lot in all the hardships I experienced. Thus I had to do something because I felt terrible about what I allowed myself to fall into.
Truly the devil will use your weakest moments to try and destroy your relationship with God. You think there is no battle for your soul? You do not believe in God? Think again because the devil is ever so present everywhere now.
If I had not been besieged so bad I would not realize what was happening. I had fallen away from the Lord since the pandemic happened. And thus the evil was able to slowly creep into my heart and mind. Yes I know I am not much of a holy person but I do not do anything bad deliberately to others. Not at all as much as I can!
As a kid I realized and made it a point to never do harm to others (at least physically) because humans are fragile. When I grew up I also thought the same about intentionally hurting others emotionally because then what good will it do you and that person?
I wouldn't be happy seeing someone become broken just because I deliberately hurt them. Have you ever seen someone with a broken spirit? That's pitiful! Also it's terrible to be the culprit in that scenario!
But it all started to change when anger began consuming me. I could feel it, slowly I wanted to be evil. I wanted them all to die for hurting me! If God was not going to do anything I should do something about it! (All the humanly things I tried and did was not working so what else was I to do?)
Ever so slightly my thoughts were changing for the worst. I was becoming sinister slowly but surely. It was getting to a point where I had to do something to stop myself or else I was sure I would go to hell if I continued down that path. (Oh my Lord Jesus, thank you for setting me free.)
Thankfully the spiritual test is all over and I truly found the Lord and our Holy Mother online. The prayers I discovered were very effective in protecting me and pulling me back to my senses. Since I said those I have finally found peace in my heart and mind. Thank you God.
If you've watched all the videos I mentioned in part 2 then you will know what I'm talking about. Did you know you can consecrate your earthly goods to the Virgin Mary? Yes Fr. Chad says so. If you want to pray it too, you can find it here.
Otherwise here's an unrelated but still helpful prayer I found from an online Facebook page. I prayed this before I even found the videos and it seems to be effective for me.
Ever since I realized my mistakes and repented, I finally have a much better mindset. Whenever the bad thought habits come to mind I start to pray. No matter what, I will not fall into the same trap again, so help me God. I have finally come to my senses. It is not easy to get out of the darkness but if you look for God He will truly set you free.
Truly I can say this Lenten season is the most fruitful of them all. I have learned a lot. Hardships will always teach you important life lessons. This time I also learned a lot spiritually more than anything else.
After more than a decade of not going to confession, I finally did so last month. And the priest was really kind. He also told me we all fall and suffer and question God at some point in our lives. Hearing that was like a pat on the back for having survived my ordeal.
I am grateful to God, Jesus, Mother Mary and all the angels and saints for helping me and making me realize what was going on. Finally I have returned to God's embrace. Thank you Lord for your grace, forgiveness and mercy. 🙏
Not everything is the same for each of us. We all go through different things in life. I also finally accepted that we cannot impose on what others must or should not do. We have our own journey.
Thus even if I tell you what I went through, most of you will not care. Why, because you might not have gotten through your own test yet. Or you may not realize what's going on in your life.
I for one know I still have to learn to accept God's will fully. There is still some stubbornness in me. This is what I need to work on further in order for my life to truly be the best in God's eyes.
As I always say, we are all in charge of our own souls. We were given free will but there are rules and guidelines provided so we don't hurt each other. Remember, the road to hell is always easy.
Yes what we do with our lives is none of other people's business. For example, even if we want to help others but those people don't want to be helped, what can we do? Despite our attempts if someone is not in the right stage or mindset yet we cannot do anything. We will only get frustrated.
Only God can save each of us. He is the only Way. And if we call for help He will surely answer in unexpected ways.
Pray to God my dear brothers and sisters for your family and loved ones and the entire world. It is effective. We may not see how and why but it is. There are many prayers online, look for what's best for you and use it.
The battle for our souls is truly happening even if we do not see our souls physically. You can see many things happening worldwide, especially online. Thus, always be aware of the things you use and do.
Also remember, Jesus suffered much more than any of us. (If you can't even imagine it, watch The Passion of the Christ.) Knowing He will be the living sacrifice for all humanity and not going against God's will is not an easy thing to do. Therefore indeed He is the Way, the Truth and the Life.
Nowadays we can see all sorts of things. We can only shake our heads due to all the evil that is pervading life on this planet. But there is still good in this world. Do not fall into despair, good shall eventually prevail. All these must come to pass.
It doesn't matter now even if I have this illness. If it brings me closer to God then I am grateful for having it. No I do not want more suffering but I now understand how and why the pain and suffering the saints went thru was something to be happy about.
Yes I can also die happy now knowing I may have a higher probability of going to heaven. Of course I cannot be sure, I can only hope and pray it happens. Amen. 🙏
And so my dear readers, I can only hope you are able to watch your thoughts and feelings too. Only you can tell what you must do if you are experiencing, what Fr. Chad calls, spiritual oppression. I pray to God that each of us will always be able to triumph against evil all the time.
It is true what the Bible says, always be ready. We do not know what will happen. If you don't fight the evil of this world you will be the devil's instrument for sure. And you will also bring others down with you because misery loves company like the devil.
Let us then stay vigilant. Only God knows about His plans for humanity. It is hard to trust in an Almighty Father we cannot see but we must. Only He is the answer we are seeking.
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Lead image from Unsplash.