When I Was Little I Was The Big Man

I started at a young age to be a big man.

I carried the paint crate on my back and the weight of life on my shoulders.

While my peers were running to play games after school, I was chasing a living in the corners of a small town's coffee shops.

I was never ashamed to go to school with paint in my hands and learn science.

I started my life at the age of twelve, much earlier and much younger than my peers.

At first, I was ashamed and even afraid to ask, "Brother, should we paint?"

The shopkeepers of the district loved me very much, and after a while I became a mafia, so not every painter could enter the places I entered without my permission. Even if they did, no one would paint them.

When I was little, I was a big man, everybody respected me, everybody loved me.

I have not harmed anyone, no one has heard of my theft or my arrogance.

Over time, I learned that dignity is the greatest wealth.

I have never held hands with my loved one, I was already ashamed to say I love you to someone.

I just loved from afar, he would pass by that street, it would be like my heart would burst.

I knew by his smell that he was passing by the street, the street smelled like him, everywhere he passed smelled of love.

He would laugh, my heart would also spring, butterflies would fly, birds would sing.

I used to work with my small body, summer, winter, snow, mud.

When it was very cold, I would warm my hands in coffee shops and continue working.

Both school and work were difficult, but life was never easy for us anyway.

I didn't play games, I didn't go to an amusement park, I didn't ride a gondola or a bumper car.

I've always missed that.

A fair would be set up in our little butcher, only then I would see the bumper car and the gondola, I could not get on it again.

There was an uncle cyclist who came during the fair, one day I was riding too and my head was dizzy, I was either scared as a child and even cried.

Uncle also refunded my money and said that if you want to ride again, come and I will not take any money from you.

I looked at him with excitement and surprise, it was the first time someone was gifting me a game, but I was afraid to ride.

Every time I passed by, I would greet the cyclist uncle, and he would always say to me, "Do you want to try one more time?"

As my body grew, I started to be a child, I lived to the fullest of everything that I did not experience in my childhood. Even though I am thirty-eight years old, I got into the bumper car only yesterday, and I took all the pain out of the time I couldn't get in.

I started to be a big man when I was little, my body was small, the load on my shoulder was big. I didn't have a new dress, thanks to my father, he tried to do his best on his own, but a mother of six children and a mother could not reach the influence of eight herself.

I've never bought expensive gifts, not even expensive toys. It turns out that I went through my hardest and most beautiful times, because everything was more sincere, everything was more beautiful, everything was simpler.

One by one, I climbed the stairs of life, we got the job power, the position of authority, but I never forgot where I came from, nor did I forget the beautiful childhood that I could not live...