Not born with a silver spoon in my mouth: my rants in life

This article is all about my rant in my life. It talks about how hard my life is going and i didn't know what to do. It just happen to appeared in my mind maybe because it was triggered by what happened today.

I didn't intend to get sympathy to you guys but to make an awareness and for you to appreciate small cents that you have in your life as it is matters to someone like me who doesn't born with a silver spoon.

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"Silver spoon" (noun)

the inherited wealth of established upper-class families.

"Born with a silver spoon with his mouth" means

that his family is very wealthy, and he is likely to lead a privileged life.

https://www.vocabulary.com/dictionary/silver%20spoon

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I just want to express what im feeling right now as i think I'll going to burst out and my chest is aching and tightens. Also my mind keeps on overthinking but can't think of the best way.

"Why i didn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth?"

"Why i need to experience the hardships of being less fortunate?"

These are the questions that always run in my mind.

When we moved here in Manila from our province. I was a kid that time and didn't care much about how hard our life is. But as time goes by as i grew older, i learn to see things clearly.

Im not saying that were that poor very much but we are not considered as a wealthy family or we dont belong into the upper class. I see our lives as part of the lowermiddle class, my father is the only one who works for us and earns a minimum wage.

To make the story short :

Why i say that i wish i was born with a silver spoon in my mouth simply because i don't want to experience what im experiencing right now. When my mother died, my father is the one who handles our budget, at first it is good we are able to eat more than 3 times a day. I dont need to think about our bills since my father is the one who takes care of it.

But things changed when the pandemic arised. My father needs to stay in his work. So being the eldest i need to handle the budget that my father will going to send to us every friday.

This is the time that i realized how hard budgetting is. My father only gave us one thousand pesos(P1,000) for a week. I thought this is big already, thats what i thought. When i begun to buy all our needs like foods, toiletry (shampoo, soap and toothpaste). Our 1,000 pesos doesnt last until friday if i don't budget it tightly. Not to mention our bills and gas that we need to pay. When we received the budget that my father send to us, i will bought a delicious viand to cook and then the next day we will back to eggs, hotdogs and other viand that is cheap so that we will able to fit our money until nextweek.

Also i have rants about our water bill, i dont know if the person who handles water here reads our meters right because i thought our water bill is going to be low as we are only 4 here in the house and to be honest my sisters took a bath three times a week and barely used water. But our bill is big and im thinking what is wrong. When i said to my father that our bill is 1k he got mad and say that i should talk to the kuya Mar(the name of the person who handles our water here), i talked to him and ask why is it big and he just answered me he doesn't know maybe there are people who uses it aside from us, our cr is located outside our house but i doubt it. In order to be sure that no one is using our cr aside from us we put a padlock now i wonder if our bill is still the same.

Today, my father called me and say to me that he will going to send me money and even talked about the water bill that is due this July 5. I haven't told him the right amount of our bill just like what i did last month, our bill last last month is 1, 129 for the whole month of April. (See the below picture) but i only said to him it is 750, my partner lend me some money for me to be able to pay our bill.

This June 5, the bill that were going to pay is for the month of May. I was shocked when i saw the bill amounting to P1,445. It getting bigger its very suspicious already. But we have nothing to do with it. My father didn't ask how much our bill is he was thinking that the bill is smaller so he just send us P1, 500 today. As i received the money in my gcash, my tears fall i dont know why maybe too much things running in my mind such as how can i able to pay our bill? How can i able to fit it in a week? What should i do when our gas run out and our meralco load run out?

I didn't tell him that our water bill is P1, 445 and he just gave us 500 for it. Im thinking to withdraw my earnings in bch which cost P680 in total in order for me to pay our water bill. I dont want to experience being cut off of water because we are not ablt to pay it on time.

Im thankful to @Read.Cash and noise.cash, this earnings is such a great help to me. Too sad i will not able to hodl it anymore as i needed to withdraw it. I dont want to but we need it.

If only i was born with a silver spoon in my mouth i will not experiencing this.

If only i was born with a silver spoon in my mouth i will not right now.

If only i was born with a silver spoon in my mouth i will not have problem in budgeting

If only i was born with a silver spoon in my mouth i will give my sisters want

But even if things are hard for me. I will not give up, i will find ways to get extra income even if im still student. I tell to myself that this is just a challenge to me.

For me every cents count. I give importance even if it is small amount as i know how hard life is when you are not financial stable. When i graduate next year i promise to myself i will find a job and support my siblings and help my father.

https://unsplash.com/photos/VIOVuBb7Xnk

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Thankyou for making it till the end. I appreciate that you read my article. I just want to burst out all my rants in life. I dont have anyone to talked to here about my problems thanks to readcash.

Thankyou to those people who keeps on supporting me @Bloghound @OfficialGamboaLikeUsboa @immaryandmerry @Eylz2021 and many more. Thankyou for supporting a newbie like me.

And to my sponsors i will never get tired of saying thank you to you all :)

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