We all have different ways on how to deal with stress, anxiety or pressure. It's not a one size fits all. Just as to how we differ from one another, but has the similarity of wanting to be unique, we can't assume that what works for you is what will work for others as well.
Me and my family lives in a squatter's area which means that our neighborhood is not as peaceful and as convenient as the life of those people who lives in village, compound or private property. We have the tendency to be thrown out of our house once the land owner takes claim of this place which means that many families will be affected.
Our neighborhood is near almost every single store that you'll need to survive. From supermarkets, schools, wet markets, hardwares, churches, parks, malls, clinics and a lot more. Honestly, it's convenient to live here but at the same time, it's also distressing at times.
For example, when the people outside our house are way too noisy, I can't focus on my job since I work from home. I can't tell them to shut up since they'll get angry and tell us to leave and go to a village. They tend to play really loud music or have a karaoke even late at night. When they quarrel with their family members, we can hear every single words they say with one another.
I'm not saying that our family is perfect and we don't argue because believe it or not there's an argument in our house on a daily basis. My siblings and parents bicker with one another but of course it's what makes our family normal. But the difference of my family with my neighbors family is the fact that we are considerate of them. We don't play too loud noises because it's not a good thing to begin with. We don't argue outside our homes when we can actually do it inside our home. We don't like broadcasting our anger against each other and most importantly, we know that when it's night time, it's also the best time to keep our homes quiet for everyone to rest. Not like our neighbors who let their kids stay outside until around 3 a.m. and those kids are all 13 years old and below. With the ongoing lockdown, instead of staying at home, they would actually stay outside and just be noisy. It's disturbing and when you try to make them shut up, it's their parents that will get aggressive and get angry at us saying that were too sensitive and such.
Out house is small but it's two storey. The first floor is made of cement which only has one wall to the two sides of our house. All our neighboring houses are not noisy like the other neighbors but it's inconvenient. On our right side, they are upto 3rd floor and they tend to throw garbage on our roof that's why it's leaking when it's raining. It's uncomfortable and worrisome. Our second floor is made out of roof as the wall, and plywood. The left side of our house has a rotten plywood wall which is why there are cockroaches and rats all over. We can't move our drawers because of we do, we'll see them on the other side.
At the back of our home, is their kitchen which is why all the smell of the food they cook, the smoke and the rats can pass from them to into our house. It's also irritating because one member of their family likes to scream at night for petty reasons. While in front of our house is where the kids like to loiter around and they also like to brush past our door screen which creates a loud noise since it's also made out of roof and our dog barks loudly.
As per the other neighbors, they like getting angry and calling out to us when our dog gets past our door. It's as though their perfect and they only see our dog even when there are actually lots of dogs loitering outside who poop and piss everywhere. I hate seeing our dog coming home beaten just because of it. They also like to gossip as though it's the only thing they knew. Whenever we have food to take home, they act like we're close with one another. I can't blame them though since they don't have jobs to keep them busy so they use their mouths instead.
If I were to choose, I would've left home long ago. I don't want to stay on this neighborhood. I want to stay somewhere safe and peaceful especially for my parents who aren't getting any younger. I want to give the life that they deserve for taking good care of us until now. I want a spacious house and a backyard where my mom can plant vegetables since she likes doing it. I want my siblings to have their own bedrooms so we can have privacy. I want my sister to have her walk in closet since she likes it. I want our house to be safe and secured. Unlike our house right now that if ever you have a misstep you'll definitely fall because the plywood as our floor is not longer as sturdy as before.
I want our dog to experience playing outside without getting beaten just because he wanted to go out. I want a roof that even if it's raining hard we won't be worried that it might be blown away by the wind. I want our house to have a spacious bathroom and a storage room where we can put all the things that we no longer use but we can't dispose yet.
Most importantly, I want to have my own room where I can write, and create art peacefully not minding that I have to be considerate of my roommate who is my sister. I also want it to be my office so I won't get distracted by the noise inside and outside our house.
I can't wait for miracles to happen. I need to work hard in order to have our house fixed and be with my whole family. One day, we will gather to celebrate special occasions like birthday parties, anniversaries and such in a spacious home where we can all stay for the night, not worrying about the space where we're supposed to sleep or stay at.
One day, we will no longer need to wait line to use the bathroom because each floor will have a bathroom. Most importantly, we won't need to bare with the annoying neighbors on our neighborhood. We won't need to stay in this place and finally have our own house and lot where we won't be worried that someone might come over and claim the land that were living at.
Whenever I think about this, I get too excited and happy because it's about time that this happens. I'm excited about what God's plan is.
Love_16
August 7, 2021
Saturday
