We all want to love and be loved. We all want to be appreciated and feel wanted by the people around us. No matter how much we try to deny it, we all long to experience the joy and pain of loving and being loved.
It's a normal reaction from us since we are all created for the very purpose of love. God created us because He loves us, therefore, we also long to be loved.
Most people has different ways on how they want to feel loved or how they want to be loved. These are what we call languages of love. Each love language is different. It's important to know it in order to give the best love to the people around them.
5 LOVE LANGUAGES
Words of affirmation.
Words of affirmation applies to all people. I don't think anyone would want to hear unpleasant words from he people they love. In fact, hearing unpleasant words from the people you love cuts deep in your heart. It leaves an unseen wound which can never be seen which also leaves a scar which somehow open from time to time.
Words of affirmation is not just about saying positive words to the person you love, it's about appreciating him/her no matter how others perceive him/her. The examples of words of affirmation are the following.
"Hey, gorgeous."
"You're handsome."
"You did well."
"You're the sexiest person in my eyes."
"I love how you are perfectly imperfect."
"You're the best."
"How can you be so perfect?"
"You're too good to be true."
"Hi, beautiful!"
"I love every single part of you."
Acts of service.
This type of love language is about giving an A+ for an effort. Others even go the extra mile just to make this love language. This might be easy for others since inate to them and difficult for others since it's not who they are.
Acts of service means serving the person you love. It's not actually about being a servant or maid, but it's about showing your love through exerting an effort. A person's effort can never be rated but it's much appreciated knowing the fact that someone has taken the time to make you feel loved.
The examples of acts of service are cooking food, preparing your partner's clothes for the day, carrying heavy loads, helping in house cleaning, doing the dishes, preparing a delicious meal on the bed and many more.
Receiving Gifts.
This love language is often labeled as being materialistic but this is actually about feeling loved when receiving something from the person you love. Anyone who loves or who has loved has experienced going all out. The price or effort doesn't matter as long as you see the person you love happy.
The difference between being materialistic and receiving gifts is the demand for an item. For example, if your girlfriend or boyfriend asks for a car even though he doesn't necessarily need it and he just wants to use it to flex with his/her friends is counted as being materialistic. First, you're not yet married to provide a gift as extravagant as that. Second, it might also be a sign of taking advantage of your goodness and kindness. So it's also important to give the best you can but not in a way that you'll be taken advantage of.
The examples or receiving gifts includes the things that the person you love usually uses or the things he/she has been wanting to have for the longest time but doesn't have the chance or ability to buy it for himself.
Quality Time.
Quality time is about spending the time to talk about things. It's the time to listen and being listened to. It's about sharing your thoughts and making your partner involved in your life. There are people who doesn't like sharing that much but once they found the right person to share their troubles with, they'll surely share even what's hidden in the depths of their hearts.
Quality time is important since it creates a stronger bond between two people knowing that someone cares and someone is interested enough to know how you feel and what you feel. It's a good sign to build a stronger connection by making sure that it's okay to share what you feel and what you experience. It's building trust and accountability with one another.
The examples of quality time are not actually when you are on a nice place with a good ambiance, but it often happens when you're both in the mood to share and to listen.
Physical Touch.
This is what people often perceive as flirting. A person clingy or touchy are labeled flirty but there's a huge difference between the two.
Flirting is about taking advantage of someone else by saying sweet words and acting like you're in a relationship when you're not, while physical touch is about being caring in a way that does not compromise your personal space and it doesn't also give you hints which aren confusing to both sides.
The examples of physical touch are leaning on the shoulders, holding hands, embrace, holding on the arms of the person you love, cuddling, sweet kisses, holding the waist and even more.
How do you know a person's love language?
It's not something to ask about, rather it is something that you must observe with the people around you. Most of them doesn't know what love language is, but when you ask them how they want to be treated or how they feel loved, they can definitely answer and fall into one of those categories. Those love languages are guides in order to know what someone really wants and how will he be able to appreciate it.
How important is love language?
Love language is really important since it creates a stronger relationship bond between two people. It's not limited to husband and wife or girlfriend and boyfriend. This can also be applied between parents and their children, siblings to siblings, grandchildren to grandparents or even between friends. It benefits both the giver of love and the receiver of love.
Why is it important to know a person's love language?
It's important to know a person's love language so you'll be able to give him the love he longs to have. A relationship can't work if only one party makes an effort, it must be done two ways. Knowing a person's love language strengthens the relationship even more. It's what people often call instant connection. Of course we will all choose to be with someone who appreciates and values us the way we deserve to be.
Is a person's way of receiving love the same with his way of giving love?
A person's love language has may differ to the way how he wants to express his love for someone.
It might be possible that a person's love language is quality time but his way of giving love is acts of service. It's also possible that his way of giving and receiving love is the same. That's why it's important to take time to know the love language of the person you love.
Personal Experience:
In my own point of view, I highly appreciate anything you give me. It's price doesn't matter as long as I know that it came from your heart. I keep letters, or even chocolate wrappers as memorabilia. I also love listening to the people around me. Hearing their problems make me feel at ease knowing that they trust me enough to share their troubles with me.
My love language is quality time. If ever you give me something, no matter how big or small it is, I will surely keep it. I like spending time with the one I love, talking about life, sharing my burdens and even just simply catching up with the people I care about. I also see to it that I leave a message to my former students just to check up to them from time to time.
I'm a simple person who doesn't ask for too much. I just want you to notice me and give me your attention. Serenade, love letters, flowers, and chocolates might have been cliché for others but it's still the best thing for me. It might be outdated but it being classic is what makes me more attached to it.
Love_16
February 6, 2021
Saturday
