I've seen a lot of people define love. From quotes, saying, Bible verses, personal experiences, movies, novels and so much more. Each person has his own definition of love.
But out of all this definitions, what do you think is the real meaning of love?
Crush. This is the earliest form which is seen in most kids. They have someone whom they always look forward to see and converse with. When you ask your son or your daughter they already has set their eyes to someone. They can also provide a lot of reasons for doing so.
When I was in elementary, I have a female best friend who has a crush with many boys. In every section or every place we go to, she has someone whom she called her crush while I on the other hand, my crush are anime characters. She feels giddy whenever she sees them and me being her supportive friend cheers for her crush even though she has too many of them.
Her parents think that it's okay since she's still an elementary pupil.
Like. When you like someone you can provide reasons as to why you like him. It can be because of his looks, his voice, his attitude, his personality, family background, talent etc.
This is an evolved form of crush. Before it was just crush but now it's like. This is something that we somehow felt.
When I was in high school I had this male classmate who has beautiful eyes. I had a crush on him because I liked his eyes. When I look at a person the first thing I look up to are the eyes. But this kind of feeling is temporal. I liked him for a week then I don't like him anymore.
We even had a spin the bottle game and he asked me if I had a crush on him and I said yes. It was too awkward because now, all my former classmates knew. I'm just glad that he's a real gentleman not to tease me about it. My other classmates are also respectful enough not to continuously remind me of that incident.
Like is also what they call one of the best points of being single. You can like or have a crush on anyone without having to think of what others will think or say about you since you and the one you like are not even an item.
Lust. It's about the body talking than the heart. It's about big boobs, sexy hips, abs, muscular arms and the body itself. You are contented with extinguishing each other's burning sensation in the body. You don't need any type of intimacy except for physical attraction. You like being caressed or being held by him. You like touching his body and he likes touching you too.
In other words, the only connection you have is physical connection.
One night stands, friends with benefits, or any type of relationship which requires your body to talk rather than your mind to think and your heart to beat.
My best friend got pregnant when she was 15 years old by a man whom she just met. She was rebellious that time to her adoptive parents. All her life she never knew that she wasn't their biological daughter. After a one night of passion, she ended up being pregnant and the man never accepted the child as his. She is now a young single mom who is still studying to provide for her son's future.
Infatuation. This is often referred to as love, only to realize that this was way too different from it.
When you're infatuated with someone, you feel it whenever you see him. You long for his presence but you're doing good even without him. You are often having the difficulty to distinguish of what you feel for him is just attraction or it's already true love. It's like love bit it's different.
Love. This is unexplainable and often unreasonable. This isn't about those shallow explanations I have mentioned above. This feeling is way stronger to fight with.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 NLT
13:4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud
13:5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged.
13:6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out.
13:7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.
13:8 Prophecy and speaking in unknown languages and special knowledge will become useless. But love will last forever!
Scenario #1: I have a friend who has too many restrictions due to her strict boyfriend. He cheated on her not just once and when we asked her to come with us to unwind for a while her boyfriend told her not to come. She chose to obey her boyfriend. We were trying to console her for her boyfriend cheated on her again. They had been in a relationship for 9 years since their relationship started as early as 1st year high school.
For me, this isn't love anymore because if you really love someone you will never cheat on her. You will never isolate her and make her depend on you only. You will allow her to enjoy with her friends since all of her friends are women.
If he cheated on you once, he can surely do it again.
Scenario #2: I have another friend who always depends on her boyfriend. She wants to do everything with him in her career goals. She wants them to be together. She was too dependent to him which makes us uncomfortable around her.
We were asking her to come with us as we process our requirements but her answer is that she'll have her boyfriend with her instead. Her boyfriend wanted to try a new job but she doesn't want to. She wants her boyfriend to pursue his bachelors degree.
For me, it's okay to be dependent but not to the point that you can't even decide in your own. You have to realize that even though you're in a relationship, you still have to make decisions on your own.
Scenario #3: In my country there are different phases of intimacy which we had since our ancestors.
Courtship/Suitor. The man will pursue the woman through courtship. He tries to win the favor of the girl he likes as well as her family. He will do everything he can to make her parents trust him for her.
Boyfriend and girlfriend relationship/In a relationship. When the man finally gets the woman's yes, in agreement to them being in a relationship together, they'll continue dating and eventually enter the best stage.
Engagement. This is the time when a man will propose to his girlfriend and ask her to be with him forever. He'll put an engagement ring on her finger and ask her to marry him.
Marriage/Eternal covenant. This is the last and final step as proof of love between a man and a woman. It's for richer or poorer, for better or worse, till death do they part. This is a sacred sacrament and is honored by the church and God.
Scenario #4: I am single. I've never been in a relationship before. I'm not someone likable because of my attitude. They say that I have the looks but I'm way too high to reach which I don't get why.
They say that I'm intimidating and I'm an alpha female which requires an alpha male to tame me.
I'm proud to be single and I'm happily growing by myself so when we meet we'll grow together even more.
I will wait for him, and as I wait, I will continuously pray that I become the right woman for him as he is the right man for me.
Love_16
January 12, 2021
Tuesday
