"Just the thought is "KILLING" me"

"I love you! Thank you for bringing colors into my dull world. Indeed you are a God's blessing"

Just quoted a common line from an in love individual. It was just a normal break earlier when my office mate and I had a conversation about the love of our life. Suddenly she asked me what if ( knocked on wood) our husband will leave us. Not that gonna have a third party but will leave this earth for good? It was just a thought but thinking of that is already killing me!

Yeah some may say, I managed to live for years without him, yet now I could not live without him? I don't know either! I can't explain why. I don't know what may happen in the future but thinking about it now makes me burst into tears. Crazy! Right?

I remember hubby and I was talking when the topic was shifted into "theme song". When I asked him he said, just look for the song "When I'm Gone " by Albert Hammond. Yes it was an old song.

I got mad after talking to him as I felt sad after listening to this song. Have you tried? He just laughed at me and told me that it was my fault as I was the one who asked. Like seriously? There are so many songs but why this? Arhhhh, yes it was a good song but really a sad one!

He is a blessing!

Just like in the quote above " My LOVE" was indeed a blessing. I mean after those heartaches I already stopped hoping I could find " the one".

We are both working in the same company and I just know him but not interested in him, LOL! Why would I? I was in a relationship before, a relationship that I never expected would turn into a terrible heartache! And YES he was there for me. Some of our friends say, I just used him as a rebound, maybe yes during that time. Yet he knows that. He perfectly knows that I still love my EX but he chose to stay. Ganda ko no? Just kidding!

I could say he really did his best as I just woke up one day smiling again and completely forgot the past. It was like a magic! I wasn't even aware that he is slowly getting a place into my heart! Am I cheesy?

First love may never die as many says but I could say One GREAT love can surpass that feeling you have to your first.

He is my one great LOVE.

I consider myself lucky to have him, well many say so. No he is not perfect, no one is but I can say he is almost. If I would enumerate my reasons for sure this article of mine will be too long and you guys will just get bored reading.

Now, why am I saying this? I don't know either. I am also missing him! I badly missed his warm hugs while whispering those sweet words. He is such a " mabola". i missed my HOME.

I am so emotional today. I am actually every time I am sick. No, not that I am terribly sick. I still manage to report at work earlier. Just some allergies and asthma attacks.

It is just my crazy attitude. Maybe because I am alone? I don't know but I remember even in my early twenties I still cry in my sleep when not feeling well. I would wrap myself with a blanket and start crying without a reason. I just feel sad.

Just like today I felt blue but no I am not crying but felt alone.

08:53 PM

04/19/2022_Manila Philippines

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