"Falling Forward"

I am the kind of person who likes to be active. I usually crave for adrenaline and mostly has FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) of any thing that is FUN! However, physical fitness has been a challenge for me lately.

A year ago I was 5 kilos lighter. Back then I would be exercising most afternoons. I would go for a run, go for a walk, hit the leg-raise equipment and I would even do the HIIT (High Intensity Interval Training). I was FIT! I get dizzy at times for pushing myself too much but I did it. I hit my goal of slimming down and losing weight. I was happy and proud of myself.

Then something happend to me that I suddenly lost the desire to be physically active. I gained weight and I was slowly fading into being apathetic on things. I felt bring indifferent and just the overall BLAAH! I LOST HOPE ON MY DREAMS. I would feel down most of the time and as a result I messed up so good that led me to making more unwise decisions in life. I got disappointed and I just didn't care and love myself already. I know it didn't just happen overnight as those were results of some of my compromised decisions in life. However, most of it is from my own self-disappointments.

During those moments, there were 3 things that really helped me overcome whatever I was feeling that time.

1. TALKING TO MY TRUSTED FRIEND: When all I wanted to do is hide and host a pity party for myself, my friend reached out to me. Although at the beginning I wasn't really much for talking but my friend knew that I would eventually do. She was there to listened and sometimes a crying shoulder too. She didn't try and solve my problems but instead sympathize with me and my situation. AND I LOVE HER FOR THAT!

2. JOURNALLING

   I am never into journalling however I find myself doing it a lot whenever I am going through something that is hard. Writing all the things that are running inside my head aids my issues on anxiety. The looping thoughts that I couldn't stop seem to slow down whenever I write about it. It feels like a therapy for my broken soul. Whenever I write, I try to be as honest as I could with my feelings and emotions. After I did, there is an instant sigh and relief brought by it. Straight away I feel and see that I am not as messed up as I thought I would be.

3. KEEPING GOD AS MY COMFORTER

   No matter how deep I have fallen into or far I ran away from Him, I always have this sense of security inside of me that HE will never let go of me. I am not abusing His love but somewhat inside it felt like an assurance. An assurance that I will always keep Him as part of me no matter what life brings. I may fail Him many times but His grace and loving kindness will always lead me to His heart. So whenever I feel lonely, disappointed and messy, He becomes my solid rock and my sweetest comforter. I know that with HIM I am safe, loved and cared for.

So whenever you are discourage my friend, always know that GOD is for you and not against you. You will get through this! If you fall, fall forward!

Thank you for reading❤️