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Romanticizing My Life: Entry 2

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2 months ago

I passed all my exams and is able to finish my schoolwork on time at the cost of my mental health. It drains me everyday but it is rewarding to not be late. However, I do think that this productivity is toxic. You might say, "What's toxic about being productive?" so I'll explain. I push myself to the limits just so I could finish a project on time. I would sacrifice my sleep and mental health then I look around me and realized that people around me are not doing the same which I find unfair. They would choose fun over the responsibilities. Example they have a hang out with friends, they would choose that leisure over finishing the schoolwork on time. But if that was me, I would prioritize the schoolwork.

I don't know. Maybe I am just jealous of them for having the courage to ask for an extension so I ended up labeling them as irresponsible.

Enough of the negativity. I just had bangs days ago and I'm rocking it. Yesterday I even had the confidence to go out and feel good about myself. When I got home I had to do schoolwork though which tired me that I had fallen asleep without being able to wash my face. I'm kind of in a journey now about being consistent about my skin care, so hopefully by the end of 2022 my skin will be clear of any pimple marks.

Yo I'm not sure how the remaining months of this year are gonna be but I hope the things that I learned from my past mistakes will be put onto trial. I really want to see the improvement of my life decisions. But if it happens that I am back to same old lesson, then that's okay I'm just gonna forgive myself and start again.

Reminder: Be gentle to you.

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