"Why do I LIVE?"

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Avatar for Khairro
3 years ago

"Innocent, naive, ignorant and unworldly."

This is me when I was just a child. No problems, no stress, no overthinking, just minding on the things that I should play with my friends. I still remember the times when I just play the whole day until sunset, my happiness is evident on my face and the enjoyment is prominent on my eyes. Then after that tiring day, I will go directly to my smooth bed in order to rest and will wake up again to start the cycle of my childhood.

"Nothing is permanent on this world but CHANGE"

Trees will grow, plants will die, animals will grew up as well as humans. As the time goes by, as the time I grew up probably at the age of 13 to 15 years old, I started to question myself. Questions that I badly want to be answered in order to be enlightened. Do you know the feeling of trying to figure out something but you can't? The feeling of the more you think, the more you will feel the headache? That's exactly what I'm feeling on that moment.

I know that I needed answers and I will not find the answers on my head if I ask my parents, relatives siblings and even on my friends. It is a "QUESTION" that only me will know the answer at the right moment of time. Indeed, change is inevitable and I can feel it on myself. I am no longer that innocent and ignorant child whom I called myself to be, otherwise I became a child that is filled with questions and curiousity.

“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when one contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvellous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries to comprehend only a little of this mystery every day.”

—Albert Einstein—

One day as a celebration of my Grandfather's birthday, my family decided to go on on their hometown to pay a visit. What I did not expect is that visitation will bring me some answers little by little, slowly feeding up my curiosity and will enlighten me from my own isolation.

When we arrived on my Grandpa's house, we greeted him, we ate, we took a photo with each other, we laugh, we reminisce some memories, we talk and we bond altogether. At night, when they are all asleep I stand up on my bed and I went on the garden. I decided to sit on a chair and chose to watch the night sky wherein the stars are twinkling and the moon are shining so bright.

I am enjoying my alone time when somebody cleared a throat, I startled and look up just to found out that it is no other than my Grandfather. He ask me why I am still awake on that hour and why I am so focus staring at the sky. I became silent, but instead of answering him I ask him "Why do you Live? Why do I Live?" He just stared at me for a while then he starts to smile. A smile that tells me he is like me when his age is like mine. He sit down beside me and said...

" You grew up so fast, last time I remember you were just a child clinging on my neck but look at you now! You are starting to find answers to your questions."

He said while smiling brightly at me. I can't help myself but to blush in embarrassment.

" Well you know at my old age, I now know my real purpose. The reason why I am born and the explanation on why I am still alive. I live for so many years to learn and share the life I've been living for. I was born to give you your mother and I am still alive to take care of you and to fulfill the answer and curiousity on yourself. Someday you will find the true answer on your head, it just takes time, don't pressure yourself."

He tapped my back, kissed my forehead and bid his goodnight. I was stunned on my place, I was so shock but along with it is the smile forming on my face. As I watched his retreating back, I realized that the answer I am looking for will be answered at the right time. I don't need to pressure myself because it takes learnings and time. On that moment, my Grandpa's answer to me is still ringing on my head. Giving me a learning on the question "Why do I LIVE?"

Good day to everyone! I am Khairro and I hope that you enjoyed the article I shared to you today. Thank you for taking time reading this, I really appreciate it. I am no good writer but I am doing my very best to be better.

Here is my account on noise.cash. Feel free to visit me on there! See yah!

@Khairro

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