There are lots of persons who have given up on Living.
I have, myself, on several occasions, so its not strange!
You look surprised! Isaac, also has thoughts of not living too?
But that's the Obvious reality!
Growing up to know that your parents didn't planned your pregnancy and wanted an abortion because they already had a lot of children is depressing.
Loosing the Bread Winner of the family and a life under the cruelty of severe hunger pangs from 2months old, I don't think is worth living!
I was lied to that "Your Dad Went to Lagos to fend for a living and will be back soon to provide".
My nursery schoolmates kept arguing that their parents insisted my dad is a dead dude.
How do I marry this two truths about him whom I expect to see as my Dad:
A dead dude or a Lagos Hustler?
Sincerely, my childhood was as terrible as my childhood look.
Nothing Desirable, a ball on pin head and an egg on stick body.
I was not an ordinary child! Matchsticks legs and fishbone arms.
The laughing stock of my school. They wondered if I really spent 9months in the womb like they did.
Worst of it, discussions of how their daddy did this and that hurts more than a million bullets shot into my head at once.
I took 31st of 35th in my first term in school. Amazing Result.
Flood of Emotional Assaults at School and home drowned me.
I'm not even fine, I know Nothing, I have one thing left: To Die!
Thoughts of dead became my only companion, it followed me wherever I go!
I lived in it for years, wanting to take my life several times Until One Day I came across something:
*Jeremiah 1:5 Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee...*
This was shocking: someone actually cares to find out about me. He even formed me!
Gradually I began to take solace in this unknown friend.
It is a difficult trusting the unseen.
I had a Friend now who knows me better. I knew it because things started changing.
My Grades changed: I found myself studying more because I had an Unseen Father who buys me stuffs when I do well and encourages when done poorly.
I made first after 3terms. And the record continues.
I didn't bother about my look again. Remember he said He formed me. I knew he loved me the way he formed me. I had to love myself as he does.
If you make others the standard for your life, life will tire you soon.
...but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise. 2Cor. 10:12
The Wisdom that my life has a different bearing from others gave me a freedom that I couldn't find anywhere else.
You're the best thing made by God: you're not seeing it because you have not have healed from peer comparison.
Peer Comparison will blind you from self development.
It will drain you emotionally and put a knife to your neck to kill.
You're not me, I am not you!
We have different backgrounds, different stories, different lives, different journeys, different purposes, different pathways to progress and different classes.
If you loose hold of this, you'll commit suicide soon, very soon.
Invest in yourself:
Read new books:
Attend courses:
Reward yourself if you attain a fit. A bottle of coke isn't too much.:
Buy yourself something New:
Study God's Word Daily:
Spend 2-3hrs praying in The Spirit Daily:
Invest your money in a profiting business:
Find a passion and pursue it with all your life:
Set Smart Goals and pursue them:
You have better things than sit and do comparison.
Lastly Remember this:
*...and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee... Heb. 13:5*
*SUICIDE ISN'T AN OPTION IF NOT FOR ANY THING, FOR GOD'S LOVE*
YOUR WEEKEND WILL BE A BEAUTIFUL ONE!
