PUBLISHED:13.11.2021
PUBLISHED BY: JUMPER01
TYPE OF ARTCLE: HEALTHY LIFESTYLE
©junperjumps
Picture a huge man, 7 feet tall, very muscular, broad chest, broad chin, huge legs, crying because he feels sick and his abdomen hurts or crying because the door knob hit his finger. Can you picture that? Try to picture a man crying for the most little thing or showing emotions so intense over some little pain. Don’t judge me yet I am not on any side of this preposition.
what preposition you ask? The notion that men should show emotions, be vulnerable, cry, break-down e.t.c .
Personally, I think it is a good idea for men to show emotions more often because sometimes bottled-up pains and unexpressed emotion can be harmful to the mind. Also it would also help us to heal faster when we get hurt which will ultimately help us to be better persons in general.
Over the year it has been evident that men are so focused on their idea of showing “masculinity” that we forget to cry most times or we never do. It’s almost like we obsessed with the idea of always showing that we as men are meant to be really strong and tough. We forget sometimes that the brain is just like every other part of the body regardless of the gender and sometimes needs some help.
Reality
In as much as this preposition sound Noble and wonderful let’s face the fact, men can not easily switch and start to share their feelings and emotions or be vulnerable . Especially here in Africa, our fathers have thought us right from birth that we are meant to be strong, never show pain there is that statement that comes at the end “you are a man” or “…be a man”. After that statement from a parent you just have to man-up and take the pain without showing emotions.
Ladies too… some ladies would say they prefer a man that show emotion and that is vulnerable around them while some would say they can never be with a man who is too “soft”. I met a lady once who said she can never be with a man who is too emotional or vulnerable, she prefers a man who is “strong” and “manly”.
Truth is I feel like a lot of people mistake true strength for something else. Just because a man shares is feelings, is emotional or is vulnerable around you doesn’t mean he is weak. He probably acts that way around you because he has a soft spot for you.
Men go through sh**t too
Just like the opposite gender we go through a lot so many men are struggling through trauma, PTSD from the war, suicidal thoughts because they don’t fit in, drug addiction due to depression, scared to show emotion or vulnerability, afraid to speak up an so many more. We feel this pain and I think the conversations should change from “oh you need to be manly enough” to “ it’s okay you are also human” sending light and love to men all over the world suffering from all these above mentioned issues . You are not alone.
Personally
I think this initiative is a good one, one of the best ones I have ever come across in-fact but personally for me I think I would be really really hard for me to show vulnerability at this stage in my life . Like I have mentioned it is how I was raised and it is the only life I have known. Now you don’t have to agree with me and my opinions it is personal that is why it is called opinions. Furthermore, I don’t think it is a bad thing that I am this way, would I embrace the effort to open up and show a little more vulnerability if it come ? Yes it all my heart but for now I love it this way and I am just going to keep living my life and trying to better myself in every way I can plus I am sure a lot of men out there feel the same way I do.
In conclusion, let us help one another for live better do not judge a man by the way he expresses himself and show emotions. Let’s allow for the existence of a safe space for both men and women alike to share experiences, show vulnerability and feel better afterwards without being judged. Let us live for one another.
Thank you for your time it’s been my pleasure…. do check out these amazing people as you make your way to the comment section..
I pray the initiative last long and doesn't go under the rug after few weeks like previous programs set aside for men.