April 26, 2021

This was supposed to be posted in Noise.cash last night but when I reread it, it came to mind that this is worth publishing in read.cash. So I copied first the whole text and save it in my notes app before I deleted in noise.cash. I was thinking that I will just write a short message in noise and link my article there.

This article is about the talk I had with my cousin priest. I wrote about this in noise, about feeling blessed as my cousin priest whom I have not seen or heard for quite a while has called me thru messenger last Saturday, April 24, 2021.

One of the topics that we discussed during that almost an hour conversation was about my mom. He asked how is my mom doing.

My mom is 78 years old and has Alzheimer’s disease due to her diabetes.

Alzheimer’s disease is an irreversible, progressive brain disorder that slowly destroys memory and thinking skills. The symptoms of which first appears during the mid-60s. The most common of which is the difficulty to remember. As Alzheimer’s advances through the brain, it leads to severe symptoms that include disorientation, mood and behaviour changes. - Friendly Mr. Google

She keeps on asking the same questions over and over again in just a matter of a few minutes’ interval. I have to patiently answer the same question repeatedly. She keeps on saying that she wants to go home to her home when in fact she is already there. These are the advance symptoms of Alzheimer’s. I now treated my mom as if she is a child.

I told my cousin that I have constantly thought of him as I want him to talk to my mom. Since the pandemic, she has not been to church nor receive communion because all senior citizens were not allowed to go out. They are more likely to catch covid19 as they no longer have a strong immune system.

I was so surprised yet happy with his reply.

He said that my mom is already an ANGEL and that we should not worry if she was not able to hear mass nor received communion. We should treat her in a childlike manner as she already lost the ability to carry on a conversation. She is always disoriented with her surroundings.

I was even more happier (that’s double adjective 😁) when he further said that my mom is my road to heaven. Won’t that make you feel ecstatic? He said with my mom’s current stage, it needs a lot of patience and sacrifice on my part to treat her well.

I know, my treating my mom well on her current stage has some selfish reasons. I want to set an example to my children how I treat my mom so that when I get to her age and I might have the same disease, my children will treat me well too. I am teaching them by example. And I am proud to say that my kids treat my mom well too. They have a great respect for mom. They play with mom too.

Never had it entered my mind that I am preparing a place in heaven. Now, every time I see my mom, I am reminded of his words. The more I treat my mom with patience and respect as she is my road to heaven.

My brother is exactly the opposite. I really have a hard time to make him understand that our mother is now a child. He shouldn’t shout at her,  most especially when his son is in front of them. Every time mom do something that is not in conformity with what he wants, he shouted at mom. And every time he do that to our mom, I keep on reprimanding him. Reminding him that our mom is a child and treat her like a child. He has a very low patience with regards to our mother.

His son too has no respect for his grandmom as he has witnessed what his father has done. He doesn’t want to go near her if we will not push him to bless “mano po” .

This, I keep on telling my brother, is how your son will treat you when you are old like our mother. You won’t see him helping you.

I told him what cousin tells me about our mom being our road to heaven. I thought he understood then. But just the other night, mom left their house at past 10 in the evening while they were all sleeping, and came to my house. Our houses are just a few meters away.

We were all upstairs already, in bed, about to sleep, when the dogs outside were barking noisily. As we were used to the dogs barking at night, they bark when there are neighbouring dogs or cats who roams around their shelter, it was not new to me that they are noisy, so I didn’t care to check.

I thought I heard a banging on the door but my daughter said that it was thunder. So again, we didn’t care to check.

Still, the dogs did not stop barking, so I decided to checked on the cctv and there, I saw my mom at the terrace holding on to a table to get near to a chair. I shouted and everyone immediately went down to get my mom. I intentionally did not call my brother to inform him that our mother is with me. We set up a place for her to sleep and my son volunteered to stay with her.

Come morning, I was just informed that my brother came to get our mother and scolded her, telling her that he almost died because he thought that she was lost. I didn’t see him that morning as we were in hurry not to be late for church.

In the afternoon, he came to see me. He was so proud to tell me that he scolded our mother because he almost died and that his sugar spiked up when he thought that she was lost.

I calmly told him, “so, did you think that mama cares that you almost died?” He fell silent at that and then it was my turn to scold him. I reminded him again of what our cousin said.

He went home without saying anything. I hope it eventually gets to his head to treat our mother well.

I just thought I’d share this for inspiration to others to treat our parents well.

Thanks for giving the time to read.

🧡🧡🧡