Listen to what your resentment is telling you.
Have you ever wondered where all those fantasies of revenge, violence and force come from? Well, It's simple, they come from your resentment, something that even If so negative, Is a common human emotion. You might ask "How resentment generates Itself?" and wonder all day as to how you feel It even to your loved ones, and this is because of the dangers of being passive with regards to people doing you wrong. Maybe one day your children didn't behave at a particular event and they made you feel embarassed while you didn't do something to correct them, your boss said something mean to you and you just stood there in silence or even your partner did something that you thought betrayed the agreement you had and you encapsulated all that rage into the bottom of your mind, letting It bug you for the next weeks or so and just growing with every time you didn't act. All these instances are perfect representations of events that trigger resentment in any person, and the main component for It to make Itself present is to not act when you know you should. That's why in this article I will talk about how listening to It can actually be more benefitial to you than just ignoring It, giving you some strategies on how to put It to use. Let's begin by telling you what happens when you just let It grow:
If someone just lets his/her levels of resentment grow without doing something about It, It can turn into something very dangerous, so dangerous that It can even turn into the terrain of the homicidal or suicidal. That's why many people that are constantly made fun of turn to so drastic measures at the last instance, as they let It sit in their minds and get into every thought of their mind while not putting their aggression in the act of standing up for themselves, instead generating a lot of fantasies that involve them getting retribution from other people for their behaviour in unthinkable ways, and at the end letting that shadow of yours come out of the surface with more strength than ever and taking matters too far.
Now that you know how bad situations can turn If you let resentment go too far, we can begin to talk about how to use It in a productive manner, viewing It more as an indicator that tells you about the things that you should solve so you can grow, get peace of mind and improve your relationships with other people. That's why I'll discuss a couple things you can do to make your levels of resentment decrease by taking into account what you experience.
As simple as that, though even If It sounds so obvious, It is still a hard thing to do for most people. If you are a person that is highly agreeable and has a hard time being assertive because of the fear of getting people pissed off, you should take into consideration that the damage caused to you by not saying what you feel is far worse than something that at Its worst can turn into an argument, as you let others know that they can repeat the same conduct over and over without getting a punishment for It. So, If people did you wrong, you should counteract right away so you can lift that burden off your shoulders as soon as It comes knocking on your door, thus eliminating the resentment you might have felt If you just did the opposite.
Things like this can happen. Someone is doing far better than you and he/she is getting rewarded because of competence, so you begin to feel a slight sensation of envy and resentment towards that person thinking that you should have received that, regardless of If the other person is more efficient at his/her job than you and Is making the right decisions. In this case is time to reflect about It by asking yourself the next question: Is this unfair or Is the other person doing better than I? If you find that It is the first, then It is time to talk with your superiors about It and make them the offer of leaving or getting that yourself. However, If It is the latter, then you know that Is a signal to increase the pace of your work or just grow over It.
I hope that this article could have served as a guide about how to handle your resentment in a healthy manner and use what It is telling to get rid of It, all so you can become a more assertive person and let others know that you deserve respect. Thank you for your support and good luck!