Writing Prompt #7: Compassion

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3 years ago

My friend who is nearly 80 years old lost her companion Sunday afternoon.

They'd been living together for several years and helping each other through the days.

Like any couple, they sometimes argued.

My friend has diabetes, vision problems and a bad back. She gets shots in her back and shots in her eyes and gives herself shots of insulin.

Her companion was even older. He had bladder cancer and lost his bladder to be replaced with a bag. He lost his hearing. He lost his vision. And his joints were giving him problems. He couldn't keep food down and didn't like to eat. He was always in a great deal of pain, but continued to do so many things for my friend.

He was an artist, as is she, and a welder. He welded a picnic table where my friend, my husband, and I ate dinner last night. He made her a stand for a hammock. He planted a huge garden (much bigger than mine) for her.

He built her bird houses because she loves watching birds.

And so many other things.

On Sunday they argued. My friend was upset because he only wanted to smoke cigarettes and didn't want to eat anything. So they argued. She said some harsh things to him and he went outside and shot himself to death in the head.

And now my friend blames herself. All day yesterday she kept begging God for forgiveness. Kept begging her companion for forgiveness. Kept calling herself horrible names.

I feel for her. I feel compassion. I understand.

But. I also keep telling her to stop talking bad to herself. Because when she is beating herself up, she is beating up my friend. But she is fixated.

She believes she is responsible for his death. She isn't. He made up his mind and nothing anybody said would have changed it.

I want her to have as much compassion for herself as everyone has for her.

It's a long road, though.

So many people have come to visit and call her and are showing her the compassion she cannot yet show herself.

This got me thinking about companionship and compassion. I have always had a great deal of compassion toward strangers, but very little toward myself.

My dad used to tell me I needed to have as much compassion for myself as I did for strangers.

I understand his frustration.

This week, the writing prompt is about compassion. Think about when someone has shown you compassion or when you've been compassionate toward someone else.

What were the circumstances? Was the compassion deserved? Should there have been more or less of it?

So many creatures, in my opinion, are deserving of compassion. From the beggars in the street to animals suffering from abuse or neglect.

What about ourselves? Do we show ourselves enough compassion?

What about our enemies. Do or enemies deserve compassion?

The rules are simple.

  1. Write about compassion

  2. Write 100% original content

  3. Write at least 600 words

  4. Tag me @JonicaBradley

  5. Have fun

I feel I should apologize for the lateness of this prompt, but I know already you will all forgive me. You are all very compassionate!

A quick note:

I am attempting to create a community for these prompts and their responses. Until I'm able to do so, tagging me seems to be the easiest way to keep them together. But on the best of days, I might miss reading many stories and articles.

This week in particular, I will miss your articles. Thank you for understanding.

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3 years ago

Comments

I am just going through writing exercise number 7, that is, on this topic.

I was very surprised by your publication and it was one of those expressions of astonishment that we make when we read something unexpected, I am very sorry for the decision that your friend made when he took his life but in those conditions I do not judge him and I think I feel compassion for him, also for his friend who was his partner for feeling guilty.

I hope that from that moment until this day that I am writing about it his mourning is healed.

Your idea about compassion reminded me of an experience I had years ago but I keep it in my heart as fresh as if it were today, many times it helps me to move forward in life. Thank you.

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2 years ago

I will be saying prayers that your friend finds a way to stop blaming herself for what happened. It will take time but hopefully she can forgive herself even though she wasn't to blame at all. This way she can at least move on in life. The question towards the end of your article. Do our enemies deserve compassion? That is a loaded question and one I will certainly be asking myself for the next week or two. I am not sure I even know how I would be if an enemy of mine got seriously ill. Would I be able to forgive whatever it is my enemy did so that I could have compassion towards them? As I am writing this comment I don't know if I could have compassion towards an enemy.

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3 years ago

So sorry to hear about your friend's companion. I hope she will find it in herself to forgive, as like you mentioned, it was his decision to do so.

Thank you for another lovely prompt. I will join for sure 💙

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3 years ago

First of all, my heartfelt condolences to you for the loss of your friend. How difficult and hard that situation must be for your friend. As human beings, we must be empathetic and supportive of our loved ones. It is normal to feel sad when something bad happens to our loved ones and even more normal should be the support we give and receive regardless of the case. That feeling of guilt that your friend must have, can do much spiritual and emotional damage, if you can not handle it, it would be ideal to take her to a specialist for help. It is very important to be there and give her all the support she needs because that is what friends are there for, to help and support us in the most difficult moments. When everything passes, she will realize that it was not her fault. What third parties do and the decisions they make have nothing to do with us, it is not part of our control, but it is very difficult sometimes to realize that, your friend will get better and understand it in time, it is part of the mourning. I hope everything gets better, blessings

Translated with www.DeepL.com/Translator (free version)

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3 years ago

I feel so sorry for your friend. Praying for comfort and healing 😥

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3 years ago

My, bless her soul. I only knew these kinds of stories through movies, so hearing this one happen in real life made it sadder. I hope she won't blame herself for the rest of her life. There are just some things we can't control nor dictate.

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3 years ago

Will surely write on this 👍

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3 years ago

My condolence to your friend. May God grant her the grace to bear the loss and also go through life daily without blaming herself.

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3 years ago

It is very good that you are accompanying your friend at this time. She feels guilty but you and I both know that even he is not to blame. This diabetes disease causes so much damage to the body that even behavioral disorders appear. And this may have led him to carry out his autolysis.

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3 years ago

Well, she is the one with diabetes. He had bladder cancer.

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3 years ago

This is a tough one to take and you are right, there is little she could have done and she needs to show as much compassion to herself too. It's tough because she will always feel responsible for him

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3 years ago

So much compassion you have made me feel with what you have experienced. Compassion is something that many people use to profit, even if they don't feel it. It is impossible for me not to go out and not feel sad and want to help a stray animal, or children up to 3 years old selling junk food on the road. Why is there so much evil in the world?

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3 years ago

Real friends are those when whole world is against you and they still stand with you. I can feel your friendship passion. You indeed deserved that fellow. God bless you.

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3 years ago

Very creative topic it touches every aspects of service to humanity

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3 years ago

My deep condolences to you friend who lost her companion, she shouldn't blame herself because it was his rough decision that made him commit such action that leads to his death. Glad you're there to accompany her during these times. The prompts can wait, your friend needs a friend now.

God Bless!

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3 years ago

I am really sorry for the loss of your friends husband, she shouldn't blame it on her self, guess his mind was made up before now. I should write something on that soon.

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3 years ago

I am really sorry for your friend. I hope she finds peace and stop blaming herself. Who knows, her partner might have thought about it for a long time already. It was just not a perfect timing. Hugs to you friend. 🤗🤗🤗

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3 years ago

I feel sorry for your friend. I hope she well do fine soonest.

This will be my first time to joint your prompt. I hope I can do well to tomorrow or the next day.

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3 years ago

So painful to hear about your friend's husband. I hope she will take things easy on herself and stop blaming herself. I'll write something on the prompt later this week.

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3 years ago

I feel so sorry for your old friend. I understand why she blames herself for everything. But she shouldn't because she doesn't know if her husband was already tired of life and living with so much pain that's why he took his own life. It's not about their arguments I am very sure of it.

Again my consolation to her. And I am really so sorry for it.

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3 years ago

Having a compassionate partner is very important yet because of anger we lose that trait in us and it causes a bigger argument. I feel sorry for your friend.

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3 years ago