Misconceptions: Marriage, is a bed of roses but don’t forget the thorns on roses!

Days back I’ve mentioned about “God cementing marriage bonds, lasts for a lifetime.”

Please don’t… don’t misunderstand. Marriage is really hell and God cementing is really something.

Imagine, you’d be spending the whole what, 20-40 years together? Like you are still 25 years old and committed your lifetime ‘til 60 with him? Really think so?

Disney already romanticized marriage, and the happy-ever-after bond, from old times “Cinderella” to “Beauty and the Beast” to “Little Mermaid” to “Snowhite and the Seven Dwarfs”, and so much more stories! All the flowery things and the butterflies but we tend to forget the other side of the coin, the thorns in it.

Like, all the sough-out for “knight and shining armor”, handsome and with all the pre-qualifications a maiden or a lad who have for a wife or a husband. Hmmm… I even see a lot of qualifiers for them to date a guy/lass but… Really? Are you sure, they are not the like who like that “closet king/queen”? Hiding the darkest secret in their closet and letting it all out in the safety net of “Marriage”.

Ok, fine. Let's make it simple. Most of the people I talked about, that marriage is only good for the 1st 7yrs then struggle after that. Of course, they say, honeymoon lasts that long then it all sinks in, the habits, mindset emerges then all of the sudden you feel like the spark is no longer there and the only thing that binds are the children! Think! Why do you think an increasing number of couples separating? Increased number of broken homes and divorces, each year is climbing?

Then live-in concepts came about to try and test the relationship if it worked out or not? Try it out for a few years and let’s cross the bridge together when it's there!

You sure, prayed together that you have to spend a lot for a wedding ceremony? A 1-day event and spends the rest of the years paying out the debts. Oh! Like I hear that wedding dresses in the US are like 13K worth of a dress only to be worn that day! Locally? Oh no! And again, “reason it as a once-in-a-lifetime event”?

Wedding Ceremonies are truly expensive since it has been romanticized and lived like fairy tale stories to be told by many. Professing your love to the one and only but forgetting that marriage has a lot of tomorrows and futures. Well, good if you really can afford but what about those…

Like few months after marriage, it's still ok until you will start paying off the debts and unexpected things happen leading to fluctuating moods and to arguments to fights. And lo! Right now, everything is expensive!

God never wants to see us suffer but because of pride and whatever that is, we show off to everyone that we can afford? And then, we find that befitting and reason it that involves God in it. But in reality, professing your love needs to be just simple. No requisites and qualifications, and God’s idea of cementing it for the couple to pray together and live to have God as the center of their lives. How can He be the center of your lives if most of your lives you are both busy working overtime to cope with the finances to pay off all the incurred expenses? Barely have time to be together as the bills come heavy every month plus, the coming baby?

Funny, our idea of life seems to be different from His views. When He has been encouraging us to be humble in our ways and yet. Although true, in Abraham’s time he was rich as his faith has been blest by God for being faithful that his flocks doubled in time.

True, God provides. But, the way you are expressing how your days, weeks, and months has been, planning for a perfect wedding has given you all the stress and all the more when the bill comes, -all the other incurred expenses. Really? And the relatives demanding over a lot of things, coming from the entourage to the venue to giveaways?

Oh! If you truly believe God wants to give you a grand wedding… Yes, it will happen. However, with the circumstance today, He’d rather give you a frugal wedding but a very memorable one! However? If you prayed enough together, oh! Unbelievable things happen. That everything you need will be all provided and that you won’t need to spend a lot because you’d be surprised that a friend volunteer for a photoshoot and video. A friend will recommend a very nice venue, half the price, and the food is just heavenly. Haven't heard of stories like this one, right? Oh! There are a few untold stories I have witnessed.

Simply because a few stories were shared a lot about the heavy expenses incurred and wedding stress… No, there are several happily-ever-after-stories had happened. That started from their wedding ceremony to wake up daily together until forever, as they all lifted it to God. Have you heard of a husband or wife who died just a few days, weeks, or months after the other half died because of grief? It's simply because life is too lonely without the other! That is how it is cemented, a heart that beats as one!

July 19, 2022
Image: pinterest