A word to be honored, not in horror!

Hmmm... I was sweet talked to transfer from the provinces to the city! I am reaping the benefits of course, one of those is convenience. Time difference really matters as it really has direct impact on my health.

Arggg! The hope is really high and it is all my fault to honestly believe that my shift will change if I did go along the plan! Honestly, I feel deceived because my intents were true and I have been honest. I am a worker and don’t have any political inclination that he has to make such absurd promises. We are not in a political arena that we need to deceive each other just to gain leverage. He is my boss and I am his staff, just that. Now, I really don’t feel the need to believe in his ridiculous discussions. All the more agitated by having earlier discussions with him that… I can’t focus anymore, I am angry! I hate it because I made a reason with bunso to transfer so we can sleep together at night. Now, I have to reward him so to make it up to him. But even with the rewards, I don’t think it will ever be ok.

Yes I am angry, will be a year now in the city and up to date he hasn’t figured it out that my need is really pressing. Worst is that he is slapping it on my face that “it was my choice” to stay on this shift? Like? What? The change of schedule was done onset 2021, while he proposed for a morning shift coming mid of 2021? Ahhh? While the change of schedule was never mine but only agreed because I was left with no option… Arrggg! Frustrating. While I am really just trying to help the team by making it easy for them now it has become an inconvenience?! And pointing their fingers at me? ok… I really don’t like it people conniving to make their own convenience! I am aware the he has problems managing the team, especially on the part of everyone else seems to be submitting their resignation. Well, a sacrificial lamb? No! Its really his problem. It has been years to recall his family troubles! His wife left him because of number of reasons and primary reason his wife told me was “He is the only one right”… arrggg! And he is doing it to his team, it’s been years! Haven’t he adjusted already? The difference between us is that I don’t need to kiss ass because I really don’t have any inclination of climbing the ladder! And I am not trying to impress SALES because the more I’m friends with them the more implications of “selling leads” to them is higher and I really have no such inclinations. I am even glad that nobody ever approached me asking if I “sell leads” because integrity is very important to me! Being approached means my values and character is quite compromised which is of course a no no for me! I am only friends with SALES so I can get good favors, the small ones, small favors that they wont complain of some delays in catering their requests because the queueing is really high… just those kinds of favors, nothing more!

Alright! What good is my word if I settle for something compromised? No one will believe me! Not even my boys! I am really pushed to an edge here where I really am starting to pack up my things and heading towards what @rebeysa85 put it “my own boss!”. Enough na! I don’t want to be angry anymore! Thank u, God bless!

Jan 20. 2022
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