Knowing who I am by reflecting myself in some deep questions

March 16, 2022 WEDNESDAY

I believed that all of us has our individualities in terms of how we reflect ourselves on every situations we've had and been through. We learnt from it but some also still doing it even though it can harm them. Maybe in the case, they didn't learn anything.

Reflecting on ourselves is one of the key on how we able to know our inner self. Of who we really are. Because some attributes and attitudes that we had are unrecognizable in our part others would know. Some, that we know but others also doesn't know. So, the way how we reflect ourselves and the thought on reflecting on ourselves is one that leads us to know better our true color or to know who we really are.

For this article, I'm going answer some questions which are related of knowing who I really am and what are my views on some points. These questions actually are taken from one of@Zhyne06 article's about self-actualization.

First question,

• What are my strength?

First and the most strength I have right now is my son. Aside from my family, my partner, my son is the number one strength I have. I can do everything even beyond my capabilities because of my son. Everytime I felt weak, I immediately thought of my son's future and I became alive again. Everytime I'm so weary, I looked at my son and suddenly all the weariness my body and mind has fades more especially when my son shows affections to me. Everytime I have lot of problems in mind, my son is my inner peace. I felt calm when I'm with my son. Cuddling with him all day. That is why I can say, that most of my strength were because of my son. When he came to my life everything changes and that includes my perspectives in life.

Second question,

• What are my values? (considering politics, religions, social issues)

Values has different interpretations depending on different aspects. But for my case, values were so vital in shaping of we really are. I admit that I am not totally having a martyr heart, a kind heart because there were times that I became the not usual me. My attitude sometimes is not what you think is good because were just humans and despites being kind there really are times that our kindness can be change into the opposite one basing on the situations that triggers me.

In terms of politics, well I really have nothing to say about it but in terms of values towards politics I think I'm not a type of person who dwells on debating on who to choose and even fighting to someone with different parties as mine. I'm not actually like that. In fact, I just stay quiet about it and respect others to those who they choose for I also value respects. That goes the same as well when we talk about religion and social issues.

Third question,

• What or who gives you comfort?

Well, it's my family. The best comfort I have ever received came from my family because they never let me feel that they were disappointed in me. In fact, I am glad to have such family that are understanding and helped me reached my goals in life and never abandoned me along my journey. More specially, I am very grateful to have a son and a partner that is really very supportive and understanding and has high or long patience in me.

Fourth question,

• What is my biggest failure?

So far, the thing that I considered biggest failure is the fact that I wasn't able to achieved my promise to my parents that I will have a better and stable work first before I'll be settling down to have my own family. Somehow I felt that I made them disappointed on me but it's just my thought because my parents never let me feel that way. Instead, they were there for me 24/7 supporting me when I made the wrong way which is getting pregnant after graduating college.

Maybe its not a failure for my parents but for me it is. But of course as long as I'm still breathing even despites what happen I can still make my dreams for my parents come true. They said, its not yet the end of the world for me. In fact, its the start of what really life is to me. The real life that I may face along the way is just started.

Fifth question,

• What does my inner critic tell me?

Well, my inner critic always tells me and reminds me on why am I not like the other brilliant people who can solve mathematical problems easily in just a minute or even a seconds. Haha

Yeah, I really admired those intelligent people who can easily solved all mathematical problems. That really is my dream that why not I am not like those brilliant people that can produce a research paper in one day or can published a book in small range of time. Why not? Lol

Lastly,

• What do I do to show myself a self-compassion and self-care?

Since I'm totally fat from 75kg I'm now 81kg. See? I get bigger and bigger. So, maybe for me to have self-compassion and self-care I should start with a healthy lifestyle a healthy body and mind. But the problem that I'm suffering now is HOW. How should I start it? Maybe, I should start it by disciplining myself for honestly I really don't have a discipline in myself and its totally my struggle.

So, yeah that was all for today's blog. By the way, thanks to my friend Zhyne, for the questions and for her article and I was able to surpass a day with having idea in what to write.

See you in my next publish?

"For my sponsors and those who upvoted my articles. I would like to say my deepest gratitude and happiness for you all since you always keep me inspired and motivated. Thank you so much. More blessings to all of us here. Love you all :) - @Janz

Lead image were edited thru canva app.