Reading assignment
**[WP] You were born with the ability to read books/documents fully with just a touch of your palm. One day, you bump into someone dressed in black, dropping their documents. You help them, but couldn't help yourself, and read the documents. Your brain suddenly short-circuits and you blackout.**
“For the next question, Luke.”
A skinny boy with thick-rimmed glasses stood from his seat, his eyes scanning the room as if he was taking in all the expectant gazes that landed on him. “Yes ma’am. What would be the question?”
“define an allotrope”
His gaze fell on the book on his desk, just as his hands lightly grazed over the book cover “An allotrope is a different form of one element. For example: there’s carbon but its allotropes are graphite, diamond, sometimes graphene if it gets processed into thin sheets.”
“Very good. Is petroleum an allotrope of carbon?”
He shook his head almost immediately upon hearing the question “No ma’am. Petroleum is a combination of many other organic materials so it has different atoms linked to it. Having different substituents does not make it an allotrope at all and the fact that petroleum isn’t a pure substance makes it more questionable.”
“Brilliant! Your previous teachers were right about you, young man” A wide grin crossed Ms. Jackson’s lips as she gestured for him to take a seat. “I hope to have more discussions with you in the future, Luke”
The rest of the 11th grade chemistry period passed by in a breeze and soon enough, the school bell rang. Luke wasted no time packing his books before heading off to the bus stop.
This grade is going to be boring again, was what he thought as he boarded the bus.
“Are you sure this kid is what we need for this mission?” From a distance, A woman in her mid 20s stood across the street. She was fixated on Luke who had just boarded the bus.
“We’ve been keeping an eye on this kid for a while now. He has some sort of powers that would surely save us a lot of time”
“Okay, okay. I got it. I just hope you plan to train this kid.” With a sigh, he dropped the intercom and followed the bus.
The bus reached its second stop and from there, the boy got off and walked to a seemingly normal looking household. Nothing seemed particularly off, nor anything special. Just a house, missing parents that are probably at work, no pets. It didn’t seem like the boy invited people over either. As M was taking her time observing the house, the door opened and Luke was off again.
“What are you up to after school, kid?” She muttered to herself as she trailed after him.
A few blocks off, she was led to a library. It didn’t seem suspicious to her at all. a lonely kid, loves books. What's so special about him? As she entered the library, she noticed that he already had a stack of books right next to him. All of them were history books. And in front of him was an extremely thick book which he was writing on. What was he… writing?
“Excuse me, miss” She whispered while approaching the librarian at the front desk. “I’m new in town and I was hoping to get a library card” She acted as promptly as possible.
“I’ll need to borrow an I.D. Card so I can put in your information, miss” The librarian seemed nice as she readied the documents for M.
Who would she be for this mission? That was her thoughts as she grabbed her card book and scanned through the fake cards in it. She would be sweet Marnie this time. That was her decision as she pulled the fake driver’s license out and handed it to the librarian.
“Ah, Marnie Stewart? That’s a sweet name.” The librarian still kept her smile as she typed in the information.
“I’m curious, who’s that kid over there? He seems smart.”
“Oh Luke? He’s my regular here. Always writing and reading something in that corner of his. He’s a sweet boy though.”
“Always with that huge pile? Is that homework or something?”
“I don’t think so? He never brings homework here, he just reads. Go talk to him if you’d like. I'm sure it would do him good to talk to someone else aside from me” With that, the librarian handed M her library card. “Welcome to Stratford’s public library! I hope you keep me and Luke over there company often during your stay here”
“I’ll make sure to” After getting her card and a few pamphlets, she headed to the shelves, scanning to see if there were history books related to what Luke was reading. Once she found one, she took out a book, she seated herself across the boy.
“You seem to be busy over there”
A startled Luke looked up at M and immediately, he covered up his notes with his hands. “I- Sorry, I was preoccupied” He smiled shyly all while keeping his things. “You’re new here. Hello” His eyes fell on the book with her. Stratford history. “Oh, were you planning to read these too?”
M just shook her head as she placed the book down. “I was actually curious about you. What’s a kid your age doing in the library?”
“I just like reading” He said with a shrug of his shoulders while keeping the books.
“I’ll help you with that” She smiled and stood up, consequently knocking over the documents she tucked in the book.
“I’ll help you get that” Without a thought, Luke crouched down, but as soon as his hand made contact with the book, shock was evident on his face. And in a matter of minutes, he had just dropped unconscious.
“I got him, E” M muttered to the intercom while she crouched down to pretend she was checking on him.
I kind of enjoyed the plot a bit so here I am with a long as story I'm still not sure how I'll finish XD
I think I have writer's block after all
Back to edgy, back to pens
Goodness, I missed being here! And I missed reading and writing, but hibernating and catching up on rest has been my biggest priority these days. Now I feel fully rested (and somewhat hungry), but definitely alive!
just a quick update on my life: Last week I resigned from my job at the laboratory because I was used as collateral damage to appease one big client. It's sad, yes, because my team and company didn't bother to defend me. It might be for the better, but I'll never know unless I try applying somewhere else.
And on that note, I have been applying again, but I gave up on Quality Assurance and I've been dying to try going into Research and Development/ Product formulation, etc. Anything aside from quality assurance because that area in chemistry is one of my major stressors in life. As of writing this, I've already emailed 5 companies all within my city. I'm just waiting for an email from this one company. Hopefully they take me because it's just 20 minutes away from my house ;;w;;
The other companies are pretty close too since none of the travel time to those places exceed 1 hour of travel time, and that's honestly a luxury to me already.
Going back to the main topic. I've been making time for drawing since the last week of May. I think that was the time I kind of stopped writing for a bit, because that was the time I consistently had to do overtime. Like every single day, I had to go home at 8 because I was given longer analysis to do. That was also the time that I decided that I needed to destress again through art because my depression was acting up again. That's why I bought a small journal and a few pens to start things off.
I was pretty happy with the thickness of the pad and I thought the paper would hold out with pens. I was pretty wrong about that though, because apparently, 180 gsm paper isn't strong enough to handle my hands.
My first drawing is "the very image of edgy" as my sister said. And I kind of agree with her on that one.
Just for reference, edgy here refers to daring, provocative and trend-setting. It's that fine line between acceptable and full on vulgar. And idk but my drawing style has always been like this. And I think it's getting more defined with the amount of stress I handle these days.
This one, I called blind obedience. And I made it around the time the election results came out. I was extremely stressed during that time. I was just happy I could use red again, because it's my favorite color when it comes to drawing XD
Next piece was also red. But this one had a cool feel to it for some reason. And again, I just really wanted to draw with red because it was so fitting with my mood. Rage. Frustration (in multiple aspects XD). I told myself that I'd take a break from red after that one though because I needed to try out the other pens too.
This one, I made during 1 week of rain. When I think of the rain, I can only think of blue and grays. I wanted to try out my blue ink with this one but it just didn't fit that strong, independent woman vibes to it. Also, for one week, I was hung up on a song called "tomboy" so I really had to do something about this vibes I wanted to pull off XD
https://youtu.be/BaOScwq_lZs
the next one was blue and green. A parody of the mona lisa made into edgy pop art, then a green lady which was requested by @baoxian23
The parody of the mona lisa was actually an artpark activity that I missed. I really wanted to go r-18 with that one, but that was when my stylus broke and I couldn't find a stylus that responded with my tablet. It took me forever to find the right stylus tbh ;;-;;
This is the finished green lady I was going for. I had 2 different shades of green pen there. And if I had a yellow pen, I do think I would have blended it more with that. I didn't have a yellow pen then XD. I only acquired a yellow pen recently and I feel bad that I still haven't used it yet.
After all the colors, I went back to black and white because I was really dying to use ink, plus I had a Victorian era aesthetic going for me in the week that I started those drawings. Like this one, I think she was heartbroken in the way I made her. Or maybe it's just my perception because I'n constantly sad XD
Then I imagined that the lady above lived somewhere gloomy and dark so I made this one to go with the space I taped the drawing in. I'm not really proud of this sketch though. It just shows how much I'm lacking when it comes to drawing sceneries and buildings. And I have no idea when I'll try improving that side of art
This was my most recent. Sadly, I gave it to my supervisor as a souvenir XD
I finished this on my last day in the lab and gave it to him as soon as I finished it. He was surprised at first because he thinks of it as vulgar. I just said that it's edgy, not vulgar. there's a difference. And I have no idea if he accepted that explanation, but he was just happy to receive a remembrance from me.
So far, I'm trying to get back to digital because I finally found a compatible stylus. And all my pieces for the next few weeks will be dedicated to spice because I asked if I could join the next launch of the spice NFT launch. My personal theme for this one: Power.
Since Chili spiciness is powerful, I thought it would be a good basis.
So far, I have 2 sketches I want to use. I have no idea how many I can submit, but I'll just keep those other sketches as reserves in the case that there would be more NFTs
This one' spower is based on royal powers. and idk, I just wanted to make an elegant looking piece for some reason.
Then I'm currently working on this one because I couldn't figure out where to put the lighting for the other one. No lighting makes the flow harder for me so it stays as a work in progress until I can think about where I want to take that.
That's all from me for today!
I shall be back when I can!
Do not board
[WP] While waiting alone at the station for the last train home, a new announcement breaks the silence: “The train now approaching Platform 1 is not for passenger use; please do not attempt to board this train.”
“No! No! No! Wait!” Devin shouted as he ran from the stairwell to the now closing train doors. Just a few minutes delay really did strike him hard this time. Desperate, he was pounding at the train doors while following it as it started to depart from the platform. He had really thought the conductor would at least spare him a glance, seeing as how late it was already. Sadly, he ended up running after the train until he reached the end of the platform.
“Shoot! I missed the train!” Devin gasped as his sight followed the train that was now disappearing into the dark tunnels. The run wasn’t worth it, was what he thought as he checked the time. 11:45. 15 minutes until the last train ran for the last trip. He really shouldn’t have accepted that project, otherwise, he wouldn’t be coming home this late today.
A sigh escaped him as he plopped down on the nearest bench. 15 more minutes before he can get on the train then he’ll probably be home by 12:30. and by then, he probably wouldn’t bother changing out of his suit, he’d probably just head to sleep as soon as he could. What a way to greet the week. It was only monday yet his body already screamed for rest. His thoughts of rest were soon cut off when the platform speakers sparked to life.
“Attention all passengers, The train now approaching Platform 1 is not for passenger use; please do not attempt to board this train. I repeat, please do not board the incoming train. Thank you, that is all”
He checked his watch and the time said it was 11:55. Five minutes until the train arrived. But a new train was already coming to a stop on the platform.
Curious, he peeked his head into the cart, nothing seemed out of the ordinary. it must be some prank. Without a second thought, Devin made his way into the train cart
“I’ll get home five minutes earlier this way” he assured himself as he settled onto the seat next to the cart doors.
As soon as the door closed, the lights flickered and a low voice echoed through the cart.
“That is, if you’ll get home” A man appeared from one of the connected carts. One that seemed to be a train conductor “Dear passenger… weren’t you told not to board the incoming train?” A smile was plastered across his face, but not one that seemed to be interested in assisting Devin, no. Far from it. A shiver ran down Devin’s spine as the train conductor’s hand slowly reached for the baton that hung from his belt yet the smile didn’t seem to disappear from his lips.
“I- I…”
“You what, Mr. Passenger?” Slowly, the conductor approached whilst readying his baton, and Devin, having seated himself at the corner, couldn’t see much of an option to get out
“I just wanted to-” As he stood to make a quick run for it, the conductor took his baton and threw it straight towards devin. The baton made a hit and within a few minutes, a loud thud and the metal baton clanking on the floor echoed through the empty train cart.
“You were warned” Said the conductor as he heaved Devin’s body towards the engine room. Devin was placed just beside the engine and as the conductor shut the door behind him, the engine came to life, but not in the way that an engine would start. What came to life were the wires that seemed to be looking for something… something to feed on.
“Eat, girl. I know you haven’t had a man in a while” was all the conductor said before the wires wrapped around Devin’s body. Currents of electricity ran through the wires, jolting Devin awake. Panic and desperation was heavily painted on his face as he struggled to get out of the wires. With what little strength he had left, he couldn’t even resist as his body was dragged into a small opening in the engine. His screams of agony and pain echoed through the engine room as he was forcefully dragged into the engine opening.
“Such a messy eater as always, dear girl.”
Been working on writing again and I definitely need to show you guys the mountain we hiked recently!!!
Stay creative!
These words might just be the mantra I whisper to myself on a regular basis now. Stay creative! Stay creative! Do your best to stay creative! If you can't draw something new daily, then try to continue where you left off, it's the best way to stay creative!
So far, it's been working and I've been back to art. Mostly because I missed it, partly because it's highly therapeutic for me since I lack social skills (still) and I think I'm kind of getting bad again because I've been avoiding talking to people again. Not fully avoid, more like... It's hard to say things again.
It's easier to show people how you feel sometimes, instead of telling them. It's also easier with writing but people want to hear things, they don't want to read or observe things. That's where I struggle with on the letting them hear part. Anyways, during this week, I bought a new art journal for me to draw on. I got it while it was on sale! I was actually aiming for clean paper but since the only thing on sale was the dotted one, I went with that since the drawings will cover the dots anyways
I also got colored pens. I'm not sure how often I'd use them but I am sure of one thing, the red and black will be the first ones to run out of ink 🤣
First drawing in it and I already went full on edgy with this blindfolded concept. It came out a bit sensual too but such is my natural art style and aesthetic 😅
Then there was this other concept I did where I just wanted to work on red because elections are over and I can finally use all the colors I love freely. I still don't know when I'll get to finish this but I'll try when I can.
Then for this week, I've also tried to digital a bit but since I've been forgetful, I forgot my stylus and I had to use my fingers to draw. It's amazing how artists can do digital art with just fingers though because a 10 minute quick sketch with just fingers really hurt for me and I didn't even get to detail it in nor finish it.
But I think it still came out pretty okay. I might save her for a character design when I feel like it but for now, I'll think about whether I want to try to paint her or to go digital on her. I've been thinking of making her a half dragon character too.
Aside from all these drawing attempts, I've been catching up on my 60 watercolor prompts. I'm proud to say that I am now on day 45 and that I'm just 15 paintings away from completing the mini sketchpad!
Last time I checked, I only updated until day 32. Now I'm just gonna update on the succeeding days.
For that, I'll continue with day 33 (jack-o'-lantern). I don't know why I added a cat on top of it but I thought it was cute 😂 and I've been thinking of adding this to my other journal but in pen sketched form. Though I'm still just looking for the energy to sketch with pens again because drawing with pens do take a while. Next to that is day 34 (fire amulet hanging from a chain)
Day 35 (floating islands above the forest) I was going for like.. the avatar feels (the blue people avatar, not the anime avatar) and I don't know but this just looks like so much squiggly lines to me, not much of floating island look, just black and white squiggly lines. Day 36 (bamboo forest) though, definitely looks like a bamboo forest to me UwU though u questioned why I used ink for this, but it still gave off that eerie feels I was going for.
Day 37 (a witch's cauldron) is one of my favourites from this set, also my day 38 (wooden shield) piece because I spent a lot of time detailing that while I was taking a break from work 😅 and it think the ornaments on it made it pretty like old Viking shields.
Day 39 (light rays in a wooden shed) and day 40 (a cozy pub) were my biggest struggles since it's been a while since I tried to draw perspectives so I was kind of off on the perspective part. It did come out presentable though but maybe I should practice perspectives and landscapes on the next sketchpad I buy
Day 41 (fortune cookie) and day 42 (old Polaroid camera) were definitely not my best work. And I think these were the last pieces I ever worked on before I had an art block for 2 months straight 😂 that plus things at work just kept happening so fast that I couldn't even find the time and energy to paint.
Today, I worked on these pieces day 43 (streets lit by neon lights) and day 44 (a nuclear power plant). It just occurred to me that I can only ever do neon on digital, I don't think I can ever pull it off unless I use spray paints for that, or an airbrush, but for now, I'll just avoid neons on traditional art 😅
My nuclear plant just looks like a small city though and it's not amusing.
Last piece for the day! Day 45 (skeleton hand holding a rose) this one was cute, I just don't know how to draw a skeleton hand 😅😅😅 but I did pull it off!
So this is all from me today! I had a pretty creative day and I managed to finish 5 mini paintings! Tomorrow, let's see if my best friend will let me draw when I visit her house tomorrow. Hopefully she'd let me draw in peace.
Do not enter
[WP] “The further down into Hell’s nine Circles you go, the harder it is to get out, until it becomes physically impossible.” “Why would anyone purposefully go further into hell?” “Because at first, it seems like heaven”
“There goes another adventurer” A tired gatekeeper mutters to himself as he watches yet another man walk pass the gates of hell.
For eons, he had tried to stop those who dare go before their time yet for eons, none would heed to his warning. Watching each and every soul pass him by had taken a toll on his being. Finally, he dared not question what the people chose to do with their miserable lives. The only thing he would give is but a single warning
“Do not go further down hell’s nine circles or you will never be able to escape”
The souls grew braver, was what he thought, when they started snickering and laughing at his warning
“Old man, we know how to control ourselves. We can make it back”
Yet each soul that said so never did.
It was on a particular day that a child managed to arrive at the gates of hell. Unusual, yes. The souls that have been making their way through there were mostly in their human adolescent years or older yet this one seemed to know nothing of the world. it was a child and it was innocent.
“Are you lost, young soul?” The gatekeeper asked as he extended a hand towards the child.
“I am not sure, I was told my guardians disappeared here just a few days ago”
“I’m afraid… they will not come back for you, young one” He said solemnly as he glanced at the child then the gate that lead to the first circle of hell.The people seemed to be having the time of their lives with their worships and songs, yet he knew it was all just an illusion. He knew it all too well
“Why do you say that?” The child cocked his head and stared curiously at te gatekeeper.
The child was too innocent, that much, the gatekeeper had confirmed. And it would have been good had the child not arrived in order to retain that innocence yet every second this young soul spent with him, the more they learn and the more they will probably ask
“Because I just know” His tone was firm this time as he sat the soul down “stay with me for a few days here and you will see” was all he could say to the child so that it would hopefully lose hope in finding their guardian.
Moments later, more foolish souls emerged from the shadows which the young soul came from “We’ve come to conquer the gates of hell!” The one in front valiantly shouted”
“Turn back now before it’s too late” was all the old man headed, to which the group mocked with laughter
“None shall stop us. We aim to prove that it is possible to return from the depths of hell”
Cheers follwed and the group marched on pass the gates of hell
“Let us watch them, young one”
The old one motioned as they stood just behind the gates the group had just entered
“They seem to be enjoying themselves, sir” Was what the young soul muttered
“But we must watch while they explore the nine gates”
In the first gate, the limbo, The group marched on and proceeded to meet many great figures of their time. It was heaven in their eyes, yet the old man knew all too well that if you cross the seven virtues, suffering and words will haunt you in all attempts to escape. That was bearable, and he had hoped that the group would have fled that circle. It was unfortunate that the group managed towards the second gates of hell: Lust. At first, they saw how many beautiful women came crawling to their feet, asking for the worldly and fleshy pleasures they had been greatly deprived of. It was unfortunate that the proud group gave into the temptation of these seductresses. And it was a greater misfortune that when one denied one of the seductress their much needed pleasure, violent winds came coursing through the vast lands.
The wild winds carried the bodies as if they were no more than papyrus. At the sight, the young soul watching shrank behind the old man. Such a gruesome scene was not something it had ever wished to witness. As it glanced up at the old man, it saw sadness and restlessness in it’s eyes
“This young one, is why I stop these souls from ever going pass the gates of hell. the further down into Hell’s nine circles you go, the harder it is to get out until it becomes physically impossible”
“But why would anyone purposefully go further into hell?” Was what the young child sincerely questioned.
“Because at first, it seems like heaven” The old man muttered as he raised his robe up to reveal the body he had grown so shameful of “Until you realize that the pleasure consumes you”
The sight sent chills to the young soul. Patches of flesh looked painfully ripped off, some organs hung from the opening in his body. The flesh might have already been burnt off in one way or another yet it did not want to ask what or how it happened after witnessing what happened to the group earlier.
“May this serve as a warning to you” was all the old man had left to say before resuming his post besides the gates of hell.
I liked this prompt though I kind of based it on Dante's version of the circles of hell. Anyways, I'm just trying to get back into fiction writing for a bit
Disappointed
While I still can, allow me to share my grief over the recent national election in the Philippines. With the dictator's son in the lead, and with my presidential candidate pleading her supporters to settle down, I am utterly disappointed. I grieve for the country, for its citizens even if I feel betrayed by a number of its citizens.
I honestly have no idea where we'll end up when they release the official election results, nor when they finally appointment BBM the position. All I know is that I'm anxious. The whole country is anxious about what will happen. I know that it should be fair to give the man a fighting chance but with his track records, it just seems impossible.
On May 9, 2022, the national election was held. Form there, my disappointment started when the ballot counting machines broke down. It was fortunate that some of the machines started working again after 30 mins - 1 hour but some of those machines didn't work until the voting time was almost over (the one in my cluster got fixed at 6PM). Some of the machines also didn't work until the following day because I saw news that some people from other regions waited up until the early morning just to feed the machine their ballots. I still think that it was due to the machine hacking incident months prior to the election and I don't think they did any additional checks on it to ensure that it will work properly on said date. All I know is that the country was not prepared for the number of voters that finally practiced their right of suffrage, nor were we prepared for the outcome of this election.
The partial count started coming out at around 9 PM of May 9 and I just thought while checking the results "is this real? Did people really not want change?" Is a transparent and thoughtfully planned out government system too hard to wish for? Can't we have someone who actually puts actions in their words?
The dictator's son was in the lead, and so was the current president's daughter. I was livid and I even told my friends that I won't be surprised if their children ran for the presidential position in the next year since their other family members already won positions in this election period. I guess the country just really doesn't know how to move on from political dynasties 🤦 next thing you know, only certain families will be allowed to run for position until the country turns into a monarchy. Back then, the joke was funny but now... Just the thought of it disgusts me.
What I do feel bad for was when my friends' families who are heavy Marcos supporters started humiliating and calling out my friends who voted against their choices. These were a few that I saw on my wall when I checked on Tuesday and Wednesday
So what the post says: "my blood is boiling! Is it that hard to accept? YOU LOST TO A THIEF,. ANON GRADUATE, AND SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T PAY TAXES!!! WHAT ELSE ARE YOU GONNA SAY ABOUT HIM, WHY CAN'T YOU JUST SUPPORT" or something along the lines. I mean, calling them out would have been fine if their relatives said "just watch and see him return the country to its golden age" but no, they basically acknowledged and mentioned all the things their candidate was and idk if they lack brain cells or what with this. Your just basically shaming your relatives for going with someone with a better reputation?
Then there was also this: "from the start, the campaign was already negative so it shouldn't come as a surprise that the results would also be negative
Everyone in politics has and will always have dirt on them so don't say that she's clean. CORRUPTION OR NOT, NOBODY IS CLEAN, WE ALL HAVE SIN"
I mean, I get that we all have sins but that doesn't mean you should drag an entire country with you in sin. And if you look at the other candidate's track records, she has no negative records. There isn't much you can put on her either that will drag down her credibility to lead a country and save it from financial crisis.
I know I'm being biased with this rant but if you're gonna lead a country, the best thing you can honestly do is to not put it in much deeper debt and shit than it already has. And speaking of financial crisis:
The current administration isn't even over yet but how did we get more debt from the world Bank??? The current world Bank debt should be at around 12 trillion and with the country's current population of around 112 million people
Each person will have to contribute that much just to help clear up the debt, but that's if clearing the debt would ever be a priority. But it's not, and we still need to maintain our country infrastructure, medicine, defense, education, and offices so that would also eat up on the tax they're collecting from us. I wouldn't even be surprised if that dept exceeded the trillions with the dictator's son in the high chair. With how he responded in interviews, I don't even think he values the people's hard earned money enough.
Oh, and there's also the fact that his administration hasn't even started yet but foreign investors are already pulling out of their deals on this country.
Like, stocks are dropping left and right and I know corrections can happen but when companies start actually sending letters, announcements and memos to the public about their withdrawal from the local market, you know that it's gonna hit the country hard. It's already affecting the PHP-USD conversion because that's already one way to check how your country's economy is doing. So from a fluctuating PHP 50-51, the current exchange rate of 1usd is already at PHP 52 and it slowly keeps increasing by cents. I honestly don't know how the country will pull through with this one, I really don't.
Then there's people saying "why not go abroad? If you don't want to stay here then leave" and I'm just thinking "look, you should know that one of the reasons the country never hits rock bottom is because of the amount of OFWs we have. Do you have any idea how much they contribute to the country's gross domestic index?" It would be fine to go abroad and to forget about the country but the fact that you send money to the country means you still contribute to its economy and if I'm being honest, I do not want to contribute to an administration who has no idea how to handle finances.
Oh and the cherry on top of this all. The assumed vice president will be in charge of the department of education and she plans on enforcing military training because "not all jobs require diplomas and degrees" and I would have agreed if this country followed western standards but no. We are Asians and if she actually tried to look for work without her father's connections, she should know how impossible it is in this country to find a job without a diploma and without a professional license. Even cashiers and store clerks require a diploma here or at least some form of certificate. So how will military training help with anything aside from war and making people into obedient dogs?
Anyways, this is the last count update for the candidates. Tomorrow they'll be making official announcements and Tomorrow, I'm getting shitface wasted after work because I need it. Sorry for the really long rant but I really don't want this country to fall deeper into ruins. The country itself is rich, it's beautiful but the people and its rulers make it so hard to want to stay here. I've already started fixing my passport and I'm looking for an agency that can help me rush my work visa for Spain. My friends told me to do it before the next president takes his spot because getting out of the country might get harder in the upcoming years.
Dating apps and me 😅
I was honestly planning on continuing my science writings today since I just need to edit and proofread most of them. (I have like 5 pending articles to edit and proofread XD). But I don’t know, I just felt like writing this since I needed someone to tell and I got tired of hearing my friends say “You’re going to spain anyways, just continue your playgirl antics there” Then I constantly need to remind them that I’m not a player or a playgirl, it’s called bachelorette dating (Same thing as Bachelor dating where the guy meets multiple women at once but in my case, I meet a lot of men). But it's still not considered being a playgirl, it's just making yourself available in the dating market.
It shouldn’t be an issue, actually XD since times have changed and through this process, I clearly get to see what I want, like, dislike in a man and in a potential long term partner. Although, what my friends say is true “That I’m leaving the country by 2024 anyways", but still, it couldn’t hurt to try. I mean, who knows where you might find the person you need in life. And meeting people isn't all about the romance, some of the guys I meet on these apps become friends I can ask guy questions.
Despite staying friends with some of the people I've talked to, I’m actually known as the biggest flirt in my friend circle but I’m not the kind of friend that would ditch them for a guy, I’m still a “Bros before hoes” kind of girl still. I'm just trying to turn the tables on guys 🤣 cuz if they can have multiple partners and dates at a time, why can't I? What's bad is when you grow attached to them 🤣 that's the dangerous part because you should be aware that when you start the dating app gaming, you'll mostly meet temporary people and getting attached is definitely gonna ruin your mental health
Anyways, I’m kind of taking a break from my flirting phase and I’m just focusing on the promotion training and on my art again since I feel like flirting guys makes me forget my art skills. And none of these guys inspire me to actually draw something too. They actually just drain my energy by the end of the day and keep me up at night. It is definitely not a worthy path. So yeah, I’m taking my friends’ advice about just waiting for Spain plus I still have… 5? guys that I’m talking to now that are pretty decent (in my opinion), and I see them if they’re free, or when I’m free, or when they ask me out for a quick meal during the work days (or a quickie when I have a lot of free time on my hands XD).
Yes, I am this liberated and I am this open to the idea of dating apps and sex. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it as long as you know preventive measures and your boundaries.
The dating apps I’ve used though… Well, I’ve tried a lot XD and I’ve been using them since I was in college. I actually met my last ex on one of them. But the ones that I come back to is bumble.
If you hear that app name, I can tell you that the people there are pretty okay, but since it’s election, it kind of went toxic this past week so I had to remove myself from it again, though I might come back to it again after a few months, when my mental capacity has recovered from all these “let me educate you on why you should vote for **** or ****” or “who are you voting for?” questions that just kind of annoy me, because I am in the app to meet people that would want to talk about things other than politics or news because if I wanted to talk about those things, I should just talk to my family instead of wasting my time. But that’s just me rambling. Bumble people are decent, they know how to behave themselves and I appreciate that, but there’s so many dead kids there (pardon the term but that’s what I call people that feel like they’re just forcing themselves to interact with you. But it’s still infinitely better compared to my experience on tinder. Though what sucks about bumble now is that you need a subscription to see who likes you and to get unlimited likes. Back in college, that was just for free. The subscription is still way cheaper than tinder though
My experience on tinder… I used that back in college, and back then, it was so fun to use. Like, you didn’t need to upload your actual picture, you didn’t need to pay for anything, you could simply use it to mess with people. I have no idea when it got bought by this communications company, but now, tinder kind of became like… the elite dating app, next to dating.com (Yes, i tried that thing too at some point and it was full of bots), so if you’re going for tinder, make sure you’re rich, you have a ride, you have a fat stack of cash in your wallet, you are an influencer or a model, or you are part of the elite group to actually be able to afford a premium subscription, otherwise, you’re just wasting your time and effort there.
Other apps I’ve tried… was badoo, litmatch, tantan, okcupid, astrokiss, boo (that one was cute, met a lot of nerds there that could understand my chemistry talk. Sadly, all of them lived so far away so dating was not that possible for me. And I grew tired of a long distance relationship because I’ve been craving the physical aspects of dating too) and I know there were other apps that I tried, but I don’t know if they were wiped off playstore or if the people in the app just didn’t make an impact on me aside from the usual horny people.
Anyways, that’s me and my dating app experience, maybe on another article, I’ll sum up the kind of guys you’d meet in those apps for if you want to try XD
Body pH, the modern diet and cancer
So last time I got to publish something, I wrote about body pH (you can check that here: https://read.cash/@Hanzell/ph-and-the-body-intro-5b053a6b )
There, I mostly gave a brief discussion about the pH in different parts of the body and how the body protects itself from pH changes. Now I'd like to briefly discuss what causes these abrupt pH changes?
So far, there’s 2 main factors for this. The first being respiratory acidosis and alkalosis. This which I mentioned is when you hyperventilate or hypoventilate. Yes, the way you breath can affect your body's pH that much. But thennn, there’s the case of your exposure to certain environments. Like in my case, I handle chemicals, both acids and bases so I have fair potential to become either acidic or alkaline. Yet environmental exposure does not always fall under the respiratory factor, but instead, it has a tendency to shift to a more metabolic factor when the lungs alone cannot handle it.
In terms of metabolic factors… There are several to consider here. First is environmental exposure. Just a fun trivia but did you know that the air in the tropics is usually acidic because of higher humidity in the air?
Back to the main topic XD Other factors to be considered are nutritional imbalances. Like skipping meals, those increase your stomach acid and it’s actually the biggest factor as to why the younger and working groups become acidic. A lot of people usually skip breakfast, especially when they’re running late for class or for work. To make things worse, the food they immediately consume when they get the chance to eat would be food that promotes stomach acidity. But then, it's not only acidity you should be careful of.
There's also your increased risk of cancer. Based on the works of Dr. Otto Warburg (the chemical constitution of respiration and fermentation, 1928), An acidic body is a magnet for cancer. It was in his published works that he discussed the metabolism difference between a normal healthy cell and a cancer cell. You see, for normal cells, oxygen is heavily involved in energy metabolism, thus making our cells obligate anaerobes. But when a cancer cell metabolizes, it doesn’t need oxygen, they just split glucose into lactic acid through the process of fermentation, similar to how yeast turns fruits into wine. This is how cancer cells metabolize, and through this metabolic pathway, your body pH slowly turns acidic.
Apart from that, there’s also the food that we consume in these modern days which are full of sugar, preservatives, and/or genetically modified organisms (gmo), these so heavily contribute to the body’s acidity.
Back in my undergraduate years, my biochemistry professor always said "cancer is normal, your body makes dysfunctional cells at times, but acidity is your fault" and I couldn't agree more after going through some papers about this. Because no matter what you do, your body will produce cancer cells and it's usually destroyed as fast as it's created. But with an acidic body and an increased absorbance of toxins in the body, it becomes almost impossible for a body to destroy the cancer cells it ends up creating.
It would be helpful to increase your produce intake though, like more vegetable, fruits, grains, nuts and alkaline water since studies have shown that cancer cells often do not thrive in alkaline environments so it’s best to keep your body pH closer to the alkaline range of the pH chart.
pH and the body: intro
I’ve been meaning to write about this topic for a while now but as to why it took me this long to write about it, that is mostly because of my job now. I know so many people that are already acidic even before they reach their 20s and I do think that they should have a better understanding of what their body goes through just to protect them from their body pH changes and what they could have done to cause their body pH to change so drastically.
So pH (the power of hydrogen/ potential hydrogen). In a chemistry sense, this measures how acidic or basic something is and is usually measured on a scale of 1 to 14. 1-6 being acidic, 7, being neutral and 8-14 being alkaline or basic. It can also be defined as the amount of free hydrogen atoms (protons) something can give off. In a lab setting, I’ve seen some acids and some bases exceed this chart though and those chemicals are often ones that are never safe to use in the lab anymore because of how strong their fumes usually are and how harmful they are.
On a medical and on a nutritional scale though, pH is usually more concerned with foods and diseases. You see. pH greatly influences your body functions since your blood pH usually follows a strict 7.35 - 745 pH. Anything lower than that, you might be considered acidic. Then anything higher than that pH range, your body is considered alkaline. Of course, other parts of the body should have different pH values since they will have a different set of functions, enzymes and proteins. Like your saliva, for example: saliva pH is usually around 6.5 to 7.5, but that is essential to begin digestion. when food gets swallowed, the esophagus and the upper stomach will have a pH range of around 6.5 to 4 then the lower part, where the food really gets digested, should have a pH range of 4 to 1.5 since your stomach contains around 1 molar hydrochloric acid and that in itself, is fairly acidic. Then from your gastric tract, the pH changes again to a range of 7 to 8.5 but this pH range is essential for nutrient absorption. But for the sake of simplicity, I’m just going to talk about the general body pH since you guys aren’t really medicine enthusiasts. Plus I’m mostly going to discuss ranges since each body differs from each other way too much. What’s a normal range for you may be abnormal for someone and that does not always indicate that the person should seek immediate medical intervention.
What’s the thing with body pH and how does the body maintain it?
Well, a change in body pH has a huge impact on your body. Most of your body relies on a certain pH to function and in a sense, an acidic body pH makes a body more prone to diseases and body problems. I’m not saying that an alkaline body pH is good either. It’s all better when your body is in a safe range.
Although your body has its own way of regulating itself through buffers in the blood like haemoglobin, a few proteins and the phosphate present in the bloodstream (ATP, ADP, free phosphates, etc). It does have a limit.
When the buffers come to their limit, that’s when the lungs and kidneys act up. And these organs always work in tandem in the case of extreme body pH changes. In case of an acidic body, the lungs will induce hypoventilation (or slow breathing). Through slow breathing, oxygen is reduced while carbon dioxide is removed. Though this carbon dioxide is removed through the kidneys and not the lungs in the form of carbonate (HCO3-). This is basically what makes your body more alkaline. Then for an alkaline body, the lungs work to absorb more oxygen through hyperventilation (fast breathing) since oxygen in itself is already acidic.
It’s in these mechanisms that make me have a greater appreciation of the human body because of how fast it acts against abrupt changes.
A little Sundate with the fam
Hello hello! I'm partially alive again today! And I feel a bit energised because I got to see something other than white walls again 😅
So yeah, today I went on a little family date just to spend some quality time with them. It's been a while since we all went out together because we're all usually dead kids by night. And since my great commute chronicles have started, I could barely hold up a decent conversation with my sisters now.
Yesterday, we all agreed that we all went on hibernation. Everyone just slept the day away then today (Sunday) we all just impulsively agreed to go see Manila zoo since it was renovated recently. It's been made open to the public and we were all curious about the changes it underwent.
I was a bit disappointed because it seemed like the entire zoo kind of shrunk. Or maybe the rest of the exhibits were still being made? I'm not sure because there was no map to use as a basis. What I was happy to see though was that the reptile house was made better for the reptiles under their care. The temperature was adjusted to their needs but again, there were less reptiles since I last got to visit and that was probably 5 years ago
That was basically everything I could capture in the reptile house because the giant snakes were all hiding in the tree trunks and it was too dark for me to capture a picture.
I laughed hard at this one building though because it basically groups kids with primates and I'm still trying to figure out if this says that kids are comparable to monkeys or the other way around 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Next part of the visit was the butterfly exhibit and that was basically everything in the zoo right now. Sure, there were a few other animals that they exhibited but most of the enclosures we're still empty
I didn't get to take pictures of the living ones but these displays were both sad and creepy to me for some reason. I understand that butterflies can only live for a few days to maybe a month but I don't know. It's just sad to see them on display like this. And I wanted to ask them if these butterflies were at least obtained ethically because even if you raise them in an enclosure, you still need to be ethical with using their bodies for display purposes. Either way... I was so close to buying a preserved butterfly 😅😅😅
You see, outside the butterfly garden, there was this really cute souvenir shop that sells butterfly themed items and preserved butterflies apparently cost quite a bit 😅 I was so close to borrowing money from my sister just so I could have one but then I realized, we have a cat that keeps knocking stuff off the shelves so I had to put that one back because I don't want my cat to knock this one over 🤣
That was how my morning went. Then by lunch, we all just agreed to eat light because we planned to go to China town to eat dinner. I told them that they should try this shawarma place I used to go to when I was still an undergrad but it closed down during the pandemic months :"( good thing it got replaced with this lugaw (rice porridge shop) and the food was so good!
Needless to say, coffee is still an essential 🤣 and we crossed the street just for this. I'm kind of jealous that manila still allows plastic usage because in my city and the city where I work in, they only allow plastic straws now.
We were supposed to go home after lunch, actually but I don't know what popped into their heads that they insisted we go to the national museum of fine arts. I was pretty sure they were all tired from the people at the zoo but apparently, I was wrong
So just a brief background: there's 3 museum that can be located in luneta park. The natural history museum, which is the newest. The anthropology museum. I forgot when that was established. Then the fine arts museum, which was the first and the biggest. Just 4 hours will never be enough to tour the whole place because it has 3 floors. And if you really appreciate the art like I do, maybe an entire afternoon still wouldn't be enough to see each piece
I forgot at what point I got lazy to take pictures tbh. I think when we reached the 3rd floor? But a majority of the pieces were oil on canvas, oil on wood or oil on panel except for the last exhibit that somehow depicted the travel of the Spaniards to the Philippines. There were a lot of journal entries there and a lot of weapons that were actually in use at that time but I kind of gave up on the pics because my energy ran out and I needed food 😅
Last stop for that day was China town!!! I really missed this food place under the bridge. It was a favourite of mine when I was still an undergrad and I was sooooo happy that the place was still there and that everything still tasted the same! I wanted to have crablets and frog legs but my sisters would definitely not let me order those so I maybe when I go here alone, I'll order those for myself 😅
Thank you for taking the time to look through my photo dump UwU
Tomorrow I shall be stuck in the lab, analysing coal for the next 2 days 🤣 wish me luck!
Commuting again after 2 years
I don't know about you guys but with the government declaring full work capacity here in my country... It's affected us in the lab a lot. Well, not just us, almost everyone because those who are already happy and well adjusted with a work from home set up are now forced to commute either for the entire week or for a few days of the week. It's kind of stupid, if you ask me. Their excuse is that it will help the economy recover. And I don't think they're thinking right. You barely get taxes from jeepneys and buses, toll gates are usually private entities and the train system here isn't fully owned by the government. Sure, there's the gas being consumed but then, what else? You're just bringing back old problems that were given solutions to already. I don't know what's up with these people, I swear.
And I have no idea why the company shuttle services was needed to be removed. We already asked the company higher ups about this, and the reply we got back was that it was part of the full Deployment mandate.
It was extremely unfair though since a large number of us never learned to commute to work. Especially us newbies who got used to the shuttle service.
On April 4, my commute adventure started. I actually overheard one of the bus drivers talk over the phone that they need more buses because of the increase in commuters
Since April 4, and until yesterday, this was the scene I had to face every morning. That really long line basically makes my 45 minute trip turn into 1 hour and 15 minutes.
And sometimes they don't accept cash payments for the fares so I was forced to buy this yellow bus card and it's kept with my blue train card. And now I'm just wishing they make something like a centralised transportation card because having way too many cards in my wallet is confusing at times, especially since I just keep all my cards in one booklet.
So after the bus, I can just walk to work or I ride a jeepney if I'm in a rush. But at least the walk to work includes a park that I can admire for a few minutes before I speed walk to the lab 😅
The park is also where I wait for the bus home
And it's kind of prettier at night since the lights are on and there's less people at 6 or 7 pm.
I'm still wishing they bring back the shuttle system because since they removed it, I've been getting out of the lab at like 6pm or 7pm and although it counts as overtime, it feels like my work-life balance just disappeared. And for a worker of my generation, that's an important part of why we accept a job offer. Because we want that work-life balance.
I was thinking that maybe next month, I'll start taking driving classes and by the following months, I'll save up for a motorcycle. I swear, this week has left me so tired that I think my energy for next week got used up too. Especially when we I tried out the trains near my office. That one was hell!
I know it doesn't compare to how crowded trains in other countries can get but I'm just not someone who knows how to squeeze myself into these kinds of crowds. It was cheap, sure but you seriously don't get any comfort and someone might Rob you or you might encounter a pick pocket on one of your trips so it's definitely not a good idea.
As of now, I worked out an agreement with my coworker 😂 since Monday, I've been begging him to let me ride home with him on his motorcycle. On Friday, I finally convinced him but we split gas expenses. I have no complaints because he offered to drive me to work too 🤣🤣🤣 plus if I'm gonna spend like $2-$3 a day on commuting, I might as well split the gas fees since I'll have the comfort of traveling plus I won't have to wait 2 hours just to get home 😭😭😭
Like last night, when he drove me home, the entire trip was just 45 minutes!!!
Anyways, I talked about this with him and his wife and she agreed that this is gonna be our set up until I learn how to drive and until I buy my own motorcycle. So hopefully by June or July, I can travel on my own UwU
A little art fair
As an artist, I have to admit, seeing different art styles other than my own can be highly motivating and inspiring. And since the pandemic happened, I have never set foot in an art gallery, exhibit or museum and it really makes me lose sanity 😅😅😅 not on an exaggeration though but I swear, seeing the piece live and in front of me has a different appeal compared to when I see them on my phone screen or a tablet screen.
It might just be with how involved I was with exhibits, during pre-pandemic days. I don't know but, live art just really hits different. Like when you see each stroke or line up close, you really feel something. And that's when you know the artist is sincere, when their techniques and ideas reach you.
Anyways, I've actually been whining to a close friend of mine about how I want to go museum hopping again or at least, exhibit hopping because we used to do that all the time during our undergraduate years. Like those were the only times I could be myself and not the chemist or the nerd. Just the me that still gets amazed with how artists can bring life to their images.
Last year, as I recall, and in 2020, art-fair Makati still proceeded like they would on a yearly basis but those exhibits were all virtual and they focused more on the artist's workspace rather than the pieces they were trying to showcase. It was nice and I attended both virtual exhibits of those years. When they announced a physical gallery this year though, I was really excited for it! So was my gallery buddy. And I didn't even have to ask her to go with me because she already expected I'd ask her to go with me. I didn't even call her, she called me and told me that she already had tickets reserved for the last night of the exhibit (April 1).
Just for additional info. All those landmarks are the galleries covered by the ticket, which was why it was a bit pricey. We planned to see at least 3 galleries but since she kind of got there late, we only got to see 2 of them. And it was unfortunate that the gallery was only open until 8pm.
In the end, we only got to see the yavuz gallery and the eskinita art gallery. It would have been great if we got to see more but I'm happy with what we could see.
These pieces were exhibited along with the wall of screenprinted crows. And I don't know but I kind of have a fascination with these pieces in a sense that they're so morbid. And I later found out that the artist bought real teeth from a dentist and that's what he used there 😅😅😅 and it kind of creeped me out because I've heard of blood painting before but I can't imagine people using teeth now
In the next exhibit room, there was this thing called cabinet art. It was also a bit creepy and it reminded me a bit on Mexican and spanish cabinets because there are some heavily Spanish influenced family that arrange their Saint statues in a cabinet in a similar fashion. But in this case, the figures have this creepy vibe to it and these were the only few I could capture but there were 10 of these in that exhibit room and each display was more grotesque than the last 😅 and I don't think people would want to see that here
Moving on, this piece was the one that really struck me. It was called "interconnected" and it definitely was. But what I admired here was that it was completely crocheted and the fact that it was hung high enough so that you could go under to see every stitch detail. I think I spent the longest time here because it was really fascinating to me. And too bad I'm too lazy to convert videos into GIFs but I would have loved to show you guys a closer shot of this and all the details in it.
Sad I couldn't retain the original video quality for this one but this next room had very timely topics in it. All tackling a different side of people's lives but just in a different manner. Not sure what this art style is but the medium of choice is acrylic paint
I liked this piece too. And I believe the style used was fresco? I honestly forgot what it's called but here, the artist used oil paints and only shaped it with the spatula. The style is definitely cool and my favourite piece was the portrait, sadly I couldn't get a picture because of the crowd
This was also part of the gallery but I couldn't tell whether it's just a display or an art piece. That's the confusing part but I still included it because why not UwU it's still pretty and I still count it as art
This gallery was one I also liked because it was so unique. It combined quilting and painting! And from afar, you really would struggle to tell apart which is the textured fabric part and which one was just painted over. It was a really colorful room that delved mostly into fantasy pieces
There was also this artist whose pieces were highly satirical. I forgot what each piece tackled but I remembered that it generally made fun of the cock fighting past time. I also forgot what the artist was saying regarding his approach to the past time because I was more concerned with how he managed to blend that nicely with oil pastels 😅😅
This one was quite twisted too but for some reason, it's a highly timely piece too. It just depends on who you think the artist refers to
I think... These were the last pieces I took photos of in the yuvuz gallery. The eskinita gallery wasn't that far but it mostly covored photography and fashion so I couldn't really relate to it much
I was specifically drawn to these photos though because I thought they'd look good painted and because the body language was kind of alluring.
We ended up walking through the galleries until 8 and I didn't know Ayala triangle was so pretty at night so we just ordered take out burgers then we ate here to enjoy the ambiance 😅 then we went home around 9 and I'm hoping we could see more galleries open up soon
That's all from me! Let's hope I can continuously write again with the 30+ samples I still need to face tomorrow
the lab moves too fast
I may sound like I'm whining at this point but I swear, the testing laboratory life gets a bit too overwhelming for me at times. This constant adjustment is kind of the main reason why I'm barely active here and on noise.cash. And I am aware that it's been almost 2 weeks? since my last update? I am not sure anymore but I do believe I've readjusted myself well enough to actually have enough brain cells to write stuff XD
So first update: The supervisor that was training me in all the analysis I was assigned to resigned 2 weeks ago. It was sad news but resignations are inevitable in office settings. Sadly, we were told that she had only 2 weeks left with us and that was when my workload got hectic all of a sudden. They basically rushed to teach me all the analysis I still had to complete. it was their way of getting me used to the workload my previous supervisor had And I have to say, it was crazy!!! Like her workload was double what they were previouly giving me and on top of that, they're teaching me how to handle the documents like the way she did. It really felt like my brain was being subject to information overload every day.
Update 2: My previous supervisor recommended to our laboratory head that I be given her previous position as laboratory exeecutive 2. It was crazy, yes! I've only been working for almost 3 months yet the training I receive now is that of a laboratory executive. That is like bypassing 2 or 3 positions because my current position is laboratory analyst 1. Next is laboratory analyst 2 then laboratory executive 1, 2 and 3. I think they'll throw me straight to laboratory executive 2 and I am legit not ready to get that far ahead when I'm still on the phase of adjusting to all the training while trying to memorize analysis procedures, but I've been told that I was doing a pretty good job at keeping up with the big shots. What they've yet to see if I can survive being questioned during audit because if the auditors see my records and my recommendation letter, I am positive tat I will get roasted alive with questions about things I am still trying to memorize and know by heart.
Update 3: we went to Pansol, Laguna for a quick getaway over the weekends. I got to know my seniors and supervisors in a different light and I also got to meet the previous members of our laboratory team. I have to say, they's all really cool people and our lab head is pretty proud of the team he built because of how diverse and skilled we all are. It was a really cool glimpse of our team's past. And it was even cooler that we, as chemists, all know how to blend alcoholic drinks XD I can now say for a fact, that chemists can become great bartenders if all the bottle flipping and the showmanship wasn't a need. All in all though, that overnight getaway left everyone wasted, someone fell asleep in the pool and almost drowned then I experienced carpool karaoke!
Last update: It is now audit week. I've bee assigned a new supervisor to teach me the analysis and paperwork that I still need to know. We've been busy updating and checking everything that the auditors might have their eyes on. Then it was kind of a bad idea that we all finished all the pending samples we have. So right now, we don't have samples to work on and we have no excuse to run away from the auditors. It would be great if you could wish our team good luck for this audit because we really need to finish this smoothly
This is all from me for today. Hopefully this audit won't leave me so devastated that I forget to function as a human being
I have too many pets
Hello hello and welcome back to another series of random writing from a very random girl. Today I thought about writing about my pets since I now officially have 5 dogs and a cat that bullies all 5 dogs 😅
I've been meaning to write about this for a while now but since another puppy was added to the family, I thought to observe this puppy first and what he's like before introducing him to you people.
This is Pablo. I have no idea where his name came from since my dad was the one that named him. So this little boy is a shihtzu-chihuahua mix. It's unfortunate that he might not grow any taller but small dogs are welcomed here 💕
Aside from being really small, he still sees himself as a big dog and he's trying to do big dog things but half the time, it just ends up with him getting hurt. I don't think he learns from it but it's always amusing to watch him play tug of war with the big dogs. He always gets carried off along with the rope
You can see that he tries hard not to let go though 🤣😂🤣 and for a 2 month old puppy, he has a lot of guts. But he still tends to sleep a lot. I think it's puppy needs. He plays for 30 minutes straight then he naps for 1-2 hours straight then it just repeats 😅 by next month, he'll need to start going to the vet for deworming and his shots and that's gonna leave a deep dent in my wallet but he's part of the pack now so he deserves it UwU
Next is El Chappo. Again, my dad named him and it still irritates me that he keeps accepting dogs given to him yet he's NEVER taken care of any of them at all. Like he'll take them out for display then dump them on me when he's done advertising the new dog. And that is why all my money goes to doggo stuff :""
Anyways, Chappo is my 6 month old baby. Yes, he's still a baby and he's a terrier mix. I forgot what the other half is but he's mostly terrier because his mom is a terrier-aspin mix then his dad (max) is a terrier-aspin mix too. These days, he's the one playing with Pablo and is teaching the pup the doggy ways. What I don't want to see is him teaching Pablo how to climb the roof.
I swear, I don't know who taught him how to climb the roof but every single morning before I go to work, I need to help him get down because he has no idea how to climb down. He just knows how to climb! It might be one of my sisters or he might have copied the cat but I'm trying to find ways on how to make him stop climbing the roof. I know he likes sunbathing but we unlock the balcony so he has a place to sunbathe. Yet there he is, every single day, sunbathing on the roof 🤦🤦🤦
Next up is Max. He's my 3 year old brat. This is Chappo's dad and he's the most snobbish dog we have 🤣🤣🤣 Like when I come home, he'll greet me. Then after receiving a kiss or a pat on the head, he'll go back to minding his own business. He's moody as heck and easily jealous too. He wants people to notice him first before they notice the other dogs and if you fail to greet him first, he'll give you that angry look or he'll just snort at you and turn his back on you. He's a huge drama queen and we are still not on good terms because I notice the dog who comes to me first. We're only on good terms when it's feeding time and when I give out treats. Other than that, he doesn't come close to me much. It's the very reason I barely have any photos of him in my gallery. He just hates the camera and he just doesn't try playing nice with me all that much.
Then we have Victoria 💕 the girl we nicknamed Visha and sometimes Vishi. If I recall correctly, Visha is the actual German nickname for people named Victoria? But since she responds to Vishi more, we stuck with Vishi. She knows her name is Victoria, but she also knows that when we call her by Victoria, she's in big trouble 😂😂😂
This gal is 7 years old and she's actually Max's first mate. The thing with their mating though is that when the puppies were around 2 months old, she started hating them. At some point, she was trying to eat them so that's why we had her sterilised a few months after the pregnancy since it seemed like a bad experience for her. Now she has an issue with every puppy she meets. Luckily she calmed down and she doesn't harm Pablo... That much. But yeah, she wants all the loving and attention to herself and it's one of the reasons why we've been avoiding getting new puppies. We're afraid she might eat them. Don't be fooled by her cute looks because she's definitely fit to be a hunting dog. We've lost count of all the rats she's captured in the house
She isn't that vicious with people though. She's actually the most approachable and friendliest dog I have. She just has really bad jealousy issues
Last of my dogs is Sebastian UwU he's also 7 and he's probably the most similar dog to me 😅😅😅 he has a bit of social anxiety, I think. In a sense that he really can't handle crowds. So every time there's a small gathering at home, you'll usually find him hiding in one corner somewhere. I can really relate to that because I often just greet people then I go back into hiding in a dark corner somewhere 😂😂😂
At his age, I've started calling him Grampa because of all the wrinkles he has under his chin 😂 and also because his eyesight is failing (like me) last time we went to the vet, we were told that both of his eyes has cataract now and it's why he keeps bumping into furniture. It's okay though because we're still spoiling him rotten with all the treats and love he needs. But he kind of struggles to go on doggy walks now. He mostly just relies on sound and scent to follow me around. Or I tie him up with Vish and she serves as his guide dog. Vishi doesn't really mind sometimes, especially when we're just walking around the neighborhood anyways.
Last of my pets is Puff. This one is a stray that chose to stay with us. We aren't really sure if Puff is a guy or a girl? Mom says she might be a girl so we refer to her as female. She has been staying with us for almost 2 years now. We don't really know how old she is or where she originally came from but when we first started feeding her, she always hissed at us and was really cautious around us. Now... She just sleeps on any high place she likes 🤦
And I have tended to her wounds more times than I've ever seen my dogs get wounds 😂😂😂 she's a fighter, that's for sure. But it's cute that when we start petting her now, she just keeps asking for more. In that pic, I was actually pulling my hand away but she grabbed it and tried to meow for more scratches. It's adorable and it was also her first few attempts at meowing at us. Since she was a stray, she didn't really need to meow. She only recently tried it because that's how cats communicate with humans. Cats don't really need to meow at other cats to communicate so I can't imagine Puff ever needed to meow at anybody until we domesticated her 😅 So far... She still can't meow properly but it's getting there 😅 and she doesn't really need to force herself to meow because I get what she wants to say anyways.
And I'm not sure if she's counted as one of our pets but meet Starky 💕 she's a Boston terrier my cousin got for him and his girlfriend. They said he'd be like their trial baby and I only get to see her whenever my cousin visits the house or when I visit their condo unit. Anyways, Starky likes me too and she always comes running to me whenever she sees me 💕💕💕
That's about it for all the animals I take care of. I hope you enjoyed this mini introduction of my babies ❤️
The memories
[WP] As you’re sifting through old photographs, you accidentally rub a photo three times, lingering over the face of a loved one. Instantly, you’re transported back to the moment that photo was taken.
It was a Friday night, nothing too eventful but on that day, Andrew promised himself that it was finally time to go through his late mother's stuff. the grieving was hard. It took him months before he could finally come home from work and not break down from the emptiness their house now carries.
It took him months until he finally had the heart to go into his mother's room, look at her photos and stuff. He knew that he would need to put some of them away soon but something inside him wished that he didn’t have to. As if preserving the way things were would also preserve the memories they shared. He really thought it would be a lot easier since he and his mother already did this when his father passed during his childhood. He was greatly mistaken. This was harder. Much harder.
Each time he picked up a blouse from her closet to put in the box headed to donation, a fond memory came in mind “Oh, this used to be her favorite for sundays” And “ She barely wore this one”
He noted each and every article of clothing that he went through. It was heavy on his heart but within the night, he managed to clear out a majority of her mother’s clothing. As he moved on to the drawers to check his mother’s cosmetics, A small tin can caught his attention. It was the photo box they used to put photos in when he was younger.
As he opens the can, nostalgia floods him. All the photos were from the time his father was still alive. The times when his parents were young, from before he was born. Many of them were ones he’s never even seen until that point.
He raised each photo and admired them intently. A sad smile crossed his lips, and it was taking everything in him not to shed a tear. No, he reminded himself, it was enough grieving. He needed to get this over with without the break downs, without needing to resort to alcoholism again. He could do it.
“Why is this photo so dirty?” He muttered to himself slowly as he wiped the dirt off. Once barely removed it. Twice, some of the stains came off. Thrice. He had a strange feeling which caused him to black out. When he opened his eyes, The smiling face of his mother greeted him.
“Sweetie, you won!” His mother cheered on him as she ushered her up the stage.
“Won what?” He looked around, confused. The only time Andrew remembered winning something was when he took a chance at an art contest at their school.
“Here he is, folks, Andrew Gilbert with his piece ‘Patches'’” The crowd roared in applause as he got up on stage and was handed a certificate of participation.
Was he transported back in time? Was the photo a portal of sorts? His mother still looked so young at that moment. On a whim, he looked at his reflection on the framed certificate given to him. It didn’t come as a surprise to him anymore when he saw his 12 year old self through the glass. He had a gift. He thought to himself as he followed the directions of the photographer and stood as close to his mother as possible
“I can stay with you forever now, mom”
“What was that, Honey?” His mother looked at him in confusion, but he just looked at her with a grin that she couldn’t decipher.
“You, me, and dad. We’ll be together forever”
As the camera lights flashed, Andrew was once again returned to the present and in his hands was the photo whose memory he just re-lived.
“Don’t worry mom, dad. I’ll make sure we stay together like you both wanted.”
And with that, he carried the tin can to his room and locked the door shut.
And so I'm trying to see if I can still do fiction. Apparently I still can though it could use some more practice. Let's see if I can get a pace again or maybe my ore samples will kill me. Either way, I hope you enjoy reading!
Cement fascination
I was talking to my friend from when I was still taking up geology and we were talking about this video regarding roman buildings. I don't know, we have this weird thing where even back in geology, we had an enjoyment for ancient architecture. We never really got into it and we never actually did studies of it but we just admired the structures because in geology, structure was important, much more so in architecture and apparently it applies in Chemistry too. We were pretty prepared to saw pillars in half too if we ever went on an expedition, But I shifted to chemistry before that ever happened.
Back to the main topic. This morning, we were going on about how sturdy Roman structures are. What she was suggesting was that it was because of structure because Roman structures where heavily based on Greek architecture, specifically corinthian architecture. And although it has some truth to it, I pointed out that the architecture was far too ornamental. Because Corinthians made use of pillars too much and much of those pillars weren't really unnecessary. Like if you look at the Pantheon, you could take out the pillars and the structure would still stay standing since the support is mostly on the walls and materials and not on pillars anymore.
Like... Roman aarchitecture deviated from their basis on Corinthan design since the buildings they erected were stand alones and didn't need as much pillar support like Greek structures.
Another thing I pointed out was that concrete use was first recorded in Roman buildings (I'm amazed I remembered shit from my industrial chemistry class tbh). Although there were evidence of use in the 3rd century BCE Cosa, Romans modified the formulation by adding pozzolana (volcanic sand) which had high silica contents. That very ingredient is what makes Roman concrete far more superior than what we have today.
I dug into that and use of limestone as concrete. It was pretty cool because What they started is still being used to this day (But with modified formulation). Back then, their concrete formulation consisted of lime stone (calcite taken from the ocean. Or they sometimes they used seashells as a replacement and that's perfectly fine because they have the same chemical constitution of Calcium carbonate (CaCO3)), then they used volcanic ash or sand (because Rome has volcanic lands), seawater or any water then volcanic rocks as fillers. You can see how their simple formulation can make these structures last centuries. Unlike now, the concrete formulation has changed so much and the lime source has shifted to petroleum byproducts so we think it could have attributed to the compressibility weakness (But I'll talk about that on another article, maybe?). Anyways, I found something much more impressive when looking through the material and durability comparison of the Roman concrete formulation vs. The concrete formulation now. And that is the fact that Calcium in Roman concrete reacts with seawater to form aluminous tobermorite.
Aluminous Tobermite (Al-Tobermorite) is a calcium silicate crystal that kind of reinforces the concrete block and makes it stronger. Although the crystal itself isn't so strong (with a moh's hardness rating of 2.5), it still adds to the stability of the structure. It's molecular arrangement is fascinating too because it forms fine fibers and plates, And that in itself is a pretty strong structure unlike with most crystals that sometimes have holes in their structures, this one is solid (yet still soft).
Unlike now, when concrete gets soaked in saltwater, it degrades, crumbles and just adds micropollutants to the ocean. But I think this discovery of theirs worked to their advantage becaause the roman empire was surrounded with seawater and volcanic lands. I'd say they were ingenious wih their adaptability to their available resources.
After that discussiun, we went on to appreciate the Aluminous tobermorite crystals
I apologize for the nerd ramble again XD my interests and conversations with friends are just extremely randomized and sometimes it becomes way too intellectual and that excites me because it's new information.
This week was hectic-
I am extremely sorry for my absence on the site ;;-;; I was trying to sneak a peek but my brain couldn't absorb everything I read after office hours so I just opted to sleep as soon as I ate dinner because I had to wake up earlier last week because of the sample overloads.
So what happened to me this week?
Well, I went to the arcade with my sisters after 2-3 years of not doing so. It was exhilarating and I missed the recoil from these guns though they can't really compare to the real thing. Hopefully this year I can talk them into going to a shooting range with me because I miss holding a real gun and the smell of gunpowder in the air 😅 I used to be good with. Ayun back when we had military training in college. I was pretty good with an m-16 too.
Anyways, aside from that, I got myself a tablet that would function as my laptop and drawing pad. It frustrated me to no end that my sister broke her laptop again and she was using mine for classes so I couldn't draw anything for a while. And it frustrated me more that I had to beg her to just let me finish a few drawings that were due for art park or for my commission sideline.
So yeah, whenever I have the free time, I try to learn how to use medibang, ibis paint and sketchbook and I've come to conclude that medibang works the best with my art style and for a week now, I've been trying to finish that girl in the tablet but I'm getting impatient too so I might just leave her as a work in progress and start on something new.
I also got 3 accessories for it so it can function as a laptop and a drawing tablet and I'm still impatiently waiting for them to arrive. It's been a struggle to draw on the tablet with the current protective screen it came with because it's extremely slippery and extremely reflective so I mostly see white spots and not what I'm drawing. Hopefully the protective paperlike film will arrive today, my keyboard case and my stylus with arrive maybe tomorrow or on Monday.
This week, I also saw new samples arrive in the lab. It was a first to see high copper ores and who knew they were so pretty
I know people usually see copper in metal form already but for me, copper has so many forms. So when it's in ore form, copper ore is usually extracted as a blackish rock. It's sent to us as a fine black powder very similar to ore. Then when you start the analysis, you melt it down with acid (nitric acid) and it gives you this blue solution (copper nitrate) and that's what makes my work harder because I have to make sure all that blue is removed so that I can work on the iron smoothly. I'll write about this another time but for now, this is all I can share 😅
For the first 2 days of my week, the ores are all the samples I had to work with since they only have a 3 day testing period. The 3rd day should be for result finalization.
After the ores... It was just pure stress for me. I think that was when Russia lost it and tried to claim Ukraine. From that point of the week, coal samples came flooding in like crazy-
Since US (I think?) Stopped getting petroleum and coal supply from Russia, other countries have started coal exploration at a faster rate and I swear- every day since Wednesday, it was like 50+ coal samples a day running on full analysis and I cannot even stress the rush we were all given by the sales team.
Trying to finish all the analysis under 3 days for 50+ coal samples was crazy and I have never been that stressed with my workload before.
And by Monday ;;-;; I'll be expecting more. Even our supervisor announced that we might get nothing but coal for the week. And if Russia cuts off metal exports too, nickel will surely flood the laboratory doors next.
That's why my goal for the weekends is to relax as much as I can because I have no idea how I'll cope up with the samples next week. Like yesterday, I went to this urban garden cafe with my sister and the place was beautiful! Plants and fresh air everywhere! Also cats! Because they apparently let the stray cats sleep in the cafe to give them shelter.
Anyways, I'm not all that excited to start work on Monday again. There were days I forgot to eat because of the stress and if our supervisor hadn't reminded us to eat, none of us probably would have. He's also working on a few of the analysis now too on top of checking the final reports and handing them to the sales team.
Hopefully this entire thing dies down and the coal samples, as well as the gas and oil prices go down too because it's always a domino effect that when oil prices increase, so does everything else EXCEPT the worker salary.
On a lighter note though, they found my missing lab gown UwU so I won't need to wear the black one they lent me
And I also learned how to engrave on glass. It was a need because our beakers were running out and with the amount of workload we're expecting, we needed more glasswares. So yeah, all my waiting time goes into labeling the glasswares
Anyways, that's all from me 😊 thank you for riding along my train of thoughts
More on coal 😅
Last time, I concluded my article with how coal deposits can be auctioned if the kind of coal this certain company needs does not match with the coal they found. So in those cases, they probably have never handled that kind of coal yet or maybe they don’t have the means or the equipment to process the coal because it isn’t a match with what they usually handle.
To give you a brief insight, we should know that there are trends of coal types per continent and country too. Like if we look at the coal we can get in most parts of asia, we’ll see that the coal is extremely soft and extremely moist and that’s usually attributed to the rich waterways most asian countries have. The fact that they’re soft and moist though, makes them a good source of gasoline and LPG. That’s why we have so many gasoline extraction sites here and is one of the main reasons why oil rigs are often in the oceans. Not because the fossil fuel they’ll get there is liquid, but it is moist enoug to be extracted as liquid. As for the testin part of this kind of coal/fossil fuel, they primarily focus on it’s gross calorific value (again with it’s energy. But if it’s gonna power an engine then this is important), then they need to take into account the sulfur, phosphorus and the Carrbon, Hydrogen and Nitrogen content. Why focus on those specific elements? Because they need to take into account the combustability (That’s where Carbon, Hydrogen comes in.). They also need to take into account the amount of air pollutant that this sample will give off (there’s already a law for Sulfur and Nitrogen, I think? Under the new paris treaty? I think that accounts for the sulfur and Nitrogen in gasoline, and Phosphorus too because that causes eutrofication when dissolved in water). This is what accounts for most asian and offshore coal deposits.
Meanwhile, for the low moisture and hard coals which are mostly sourced from landlocked areas such as the middle east, australia and in most parts of the states, these coal samples are ones that are mostly used for energy, cement, and steel production because of their incredibly low moisture content. I am not sure what specifications or parameters are needed for steel production, actually but almost 70% of the steel used in the industry is alloyed with coal (coke, actually but we’re talking about coal so I’m staying on coal). It’s also used in producing aluminum and copper but I am also not sure on whether the coal is used in the smelting process or if it’s an additive of sorts.
Anyways, I think I’ve talked enough about coal for this week. Next week… who knows what I’ll be focusing on XD
I do think I should finish my carnitine article though. Because these are all based on my coal handling and analysis training! Maybe I'll be writing about ores too since I mostly handle that in the laboratory.
Art updates? We'll see when I have the time. Life update? I'll try 😅
Thank you for reading up on my nerd talk up until now! I greatly appreciate it UwU
All because of coal
It’s Valentine’s day today! And guess how I celebrated it! By dating my samples XD
Yes, I lack a solid love life so I have no special someone to go on a date with but at least I got paid for my time ;;w;; can your date pay for your time? (Okno that’s mean). Also, I had to do overtime and I started on this article while I was waiting for my last batch of coal samples to be ready for reweighing. Might as well stay productive while I’m already productive, right?
Anyways, since I’ve been posting so much about coal on my noise.cash account, I thought that I might as well write about it. This isn’t a study of sorts but it is good to appreciate commodities that people otherwise take for granted.
So coal. In most cases, it’s used as a power source, especially for big countries and first world countries. Or countries that have a coal deposit somewhere. But then, what people don’t know is that it has many more uses such as metal production. Yes, coal is used for making metals that we use in construction. It’s also used for cement production. The key ingredients for cement is usually a byproduct of coal. It’s also the source of your LPG (liquefied petroleum gas) and is often further processed into other chemicals like methanol, ammonia and urea. Those which are either used in the lab or are mixed into the fertilizers that the agricultural sector uses.
But wait, didn’t energy and LPG come from fossil fuels? Well, coal is a fossil fuel. Please correct the knowledge that fossil fuel comes in liquid form like what you see in cartoons. Fossil fuel is extracted as coal, and sometimes as this thick black liquid that smells nauseating. And from that coal, they process it into the different materials I mentioned earlier.
Where does my job come in?
Well, in the lab I’m in, coal gets shipped to us straight from the site. It usually comes in lots and batches. So usually, in a batch, you get 10-28 (that’s the highest lot number i’ve tested so far). A lot is like a spot in a site where they get sample from. When inspectors find a deposit, they’ll immediately bag up a portion from each lot and send it to us as soon as possible because if the results are good, it immediately gets extracted and processed for energy or for metals production. Sometimes for gasoline and LPG production too but that depends on the company taht ships to us. The only thing we, as chemists do, is to tag the coal we receive and interpret the data that they need.
The data they usually need is moisture, ash, volatile matter, sulfur content, phosphorus content, carbon, hydrogen and nitrogen content, and the gross calorific value. I won’t disclose any methods here but you should understand that each test here is taken into account for a reason.
Let’s say, one company that focuses on cement production sends in a shipment of coal, they would want the results to focus on the ash and moisture. Fly ash is one of the major cement constituents, and moisture plays an important role in the texture of the cement. So if this company wants to use coal for their cement, they’ll want to find coal deposits that have high ashing yields and very low moisture content.
For example, we get a shipment of coal from a company that focuses on energy production, the key items they would want to know is: what is the gross calorific value this coal sample has. This measures energy and if this coal sample is high energy, it would be a site for coal mining. If not, they usually auction it out to companies that also use coal for different commodities.
Auctioning it is pretty rare though unless the company inspects different countries. But I'll save that for another article. This is all from me today ❤️
Carnitine and diet: intro
Hello hello! I am back and today, I saw an ad from this person I sat next to in the shuttle to work. What was the relevance of that ad? Well, it was a commercial about this local drink that promotes one of their ingredients, **L-carnitine.** And I remembered that while growing up, I had an aunt that had a bottle of this every single day because of how it promoted weight loss. It actually didn’t. It might have been one of the major causes of her diabetes (aside from heredity, but I’ll talk about the market and sugars another time).
Going back, the ad wasn’t entirely lying about L-carnitine and weight loss, but it did cut off information about it. For one, L-carnitine does help with fat metabolism, but it has body requirements for it to do so. And first and foremost is, Does your body need the extra L-carnitine you take in?
Before I go into detail about how it affects weight loss, it would be good to talk about what this L-carnitine is.
Carnitine, collectively, is a biomolecule. It’s made of lysine and methionine, and a vitamin C precursor (these are amino acids). And it is a key component in converting fats to energy by transporting fatty acids to your mitochondria.
That’s why carnitine is often used as a nutrient and dietary supplement that can be taken by IV route or by mouth. Though it will always depend on your condition.
But then, you don’t really need to take supplements when carnitine is already found in your diet as you can see in the chart below. It accounts for the general amount of carnitine found in food. And one thing you should take note of is that the carnitine found in your diet is generally easier to absorb than the supplements that are just enriched with carnitine. It’s one of the many reasons why I think those juices that boast about having carnitine are a waste of money (this is a personal thought, okay? If you like it then I’m not gonna stop you from buying, I just take into consideration the crazy amounts of sugar that go into the drink too. It’s like a bottle of diabetes).
I did mention that carnitine is the collective term. That is because carnitine has different forms. You have:
**L-carnitine** - This is the active and standard form of carnitine and the one that transports your body’s fatty acid to the mitochondria. It’s actually one of the key components in diet supplements. But since this is the naturally occurring form, it's also found in your diet.
**D-carnitine** - is the inactive one. People don’t usually make this in the body, but if they do, they’re more likely the ones that suffer from carnitine deficiency and that’s a rare disease.
**Acetyl-L-Carnitine (ALCAR)** - This one is the form of carnitine that’s good for your brain and I have seen papers on this being used for brain related diseases like in Alzheimer’s studies but there aren’t any concrete results yet.
**Propionyl-L-Carnitine** - This one is what they recommend for people with blood circulation problems since it boosts the production of nitric oxide in the body and that improves blood flow. I do believe they use this as a component of hypertension medication (if I remember correctly;;-;;)
**L-Carnitine L-tartrate** - I believe this is what they add in the juice I mentioned earlier, but then, it’s not just found in that juice, it’s also used in a vast number of sports drinks sold in the market today. This is popular in sports drinks because it’s absorbed fast, similar to the ones found in your diet. And some papers have shown that it aids with muscle soreness and recovery after exercise. But I’d still watch the sugar content if I were you.
I'll continue this on my next article since I used up all my energy again for the day 😅😅😅 Next topic to cover: How it supposedly aids with weight loss + clinical studies
Disclaimer: I'm not a med student, I'm just fascinated with compounds that go into food XD Half of the info I have here is basically taken from my old college notes
Halfway through the 60 day art challenge
Hello from me again! How've you guys been? I feel like my writing quality has greatly declined since I started work a month ago. My art quality has stayed the same so I've been more focused on that 😅 As they do say, the brain will forget to do certain things, but muscle memory will never fade. And I suppose that's the case with my ability to maintain my art quality.
And speaking of art, I'm proud to say that I'm halfway done with the 60 day art challenge I've been working on. I know this is mostly what I talk about recently, but I can't seem to find the time to work on other things since the quantity of samples that gets assigned to me at work is still overwhelming for me, a person who hasn't worked in almost a year now. And it's taking a while longer for me to adjust since the commodities are different so the specifications, guidelines and methods are all different. I'm kind of proud to be part of the group that validated new methods for certain samples though. Not a lot of company newbies get blessed to be part of the method validation. But that part, I'll save for another day.
For today, I'll just be showing a few painting updates.
So the last time I uploaded my progress was from last week (you can check out that article here: https://read.cash/@Hanzell/my-60-day-art-challenge-so-far-1f9cf488 ) that one covers a lot of my missed days and I believe I stopped somewhere around day 24? Because I skipped a day.
I'll be continuing where I left off 😅
So the last time I compiled my paintings, it was unfinished
Here I have day 23 (an alchemist's lab) and day 24 (a lush, misty forest). The alchemist lab was heavily inspired by Harry potter (that's Snape's laboratory. And although he teaches potions, it's kind of the closest thing I can think of to an alchemy lab). The lush, misty forest... You guys have probably seen that already either in the last update or on noise 😅
Day 25 (the tree of life) and day 26 (an opened jewelry box). There two are my least interesting paintings so far, I think. And I was on a pretty big dilemma on both. For one, when you look up the tree of life, it's either you get a coconut tree or a tree of many colours. So the latter is basically what I went with here. As for my jewelry box... I don't think it even looks like a jewelry box 😅
Day 27 (cloud kingdom) and day 28 (a bridge over a river) are among the pieces I wasn't so fond of painting because the cloud kingdom didn't really look like it was on a cloud. Then the bridge looked okay? I just think a different colour scheme would have been better.
Day 29 (trader's horse and wagon) and day 30 (a ruler's throne). These pieces made me question my knowledge on perspectives 😅😅😅 they just look off to me for some reason yet I can't put a finger on where and how I should fix it so it stayed like that. I think it's the lack of Shadows somehow.
Day 31 (a vegetable garden) and day 32 (swamp). These are my last pieces for this weekend and I do think it'll be a while until I can continue with the remaining days.
My progress isn't that bad though. If it takes me 30 minutes or so per painting, and my art time is only for 3-4 hours a day (I have chores to do too 😤😤😤) then I'm not that slow. Not am I painting too fast that my art quality drops.
Also, as to why I haven't been working on anything digital lately. Well that's because my sister has been borrowing my laptop since her classes started. She broke hers and as the eldest sister, I need to make a sacrifice since she's still studying and she can't buy her own gadget yet ;;-;;
Right now I'm saving up for a tablet that's appropriate for digital arts and hopefully I can get that within the month while my sister isn't so flooded with schoolwork ;;-;;
This is all from me for today. Thank you for reading UwU
Hello love?
Usually I'd be asleep by now because work is exhausting and the only bit of energy I have left would be for the dogs. But since we had sensory evaluation in the laboratory and I'm pretty overloaded on ice cream, O thought I'd type away all the excess energy I still have left.
In relation to the "love month" I figured I'd write something related to romance and maybe my love life so far 😅😅😅 don't judge, I just don't know where to put this. But yeah, I think I have a love life again?
It's been a little over a year since I broke up with my last ex. It wasn't pretty and I kind of got over it after 2-3 months because I had board reviews and because I got too immersed in arts. In between those months of being single though, I didn't even feel single 😂 my friends kept recommending guy after guy to me. Dating app after dating app. This was solely for the reason that they want to see me get married and be happy.
I kept telling them that I'm happy with my dogs and the art community I'm in. I swear, I am! And I'm happy with my new planting hobby but you know friends. They really want to attend your wedding for some reason so they just kept referring guys and idk, I tried but a lot of people just don't click with me.
Around the time I finished my board exam, my high school friend recommended that I try this dating app called "boo" because it's full of nerds like me. Maybe someone would give me the convo I was looking for. I gave it a shot cuz I know she won't stop pestering me about it 🤣
So I installed it, gave it a few swipe left and right, talked to a few people and true enough, they were nerds that value intelligence. I found my kind of people 😂 and through a series of elimination, I ended up with this one guy. I call him CJ but his name is ancient 😅
So yeah, we've been talking since the start of November and since the start of 2022, he's been attempting to court me. And take note, he live in the US so we have only seen each other through video calls and stuff.
What I find amusing is that he set up a big piggy bank in his room (it's actually a giant bottle he bought but he still calls it a piggy bank) and labeled it "airplane ticket funds" and every day, he made sure he would add something to it. I'm not sure about his saving progress but aside from that, he's been asking me out on movie dates and art dates when I'm free from work.
The movie dates are fun because we mostly have the same preferences. So if it's not Disney or Pixar, we go with horror or something new on netflix. We've been planning on running an anime series but those usually take longer than movies so I have no idea if we can do an anime marathon.
We've been doing these movie dates for maybe a month now? And it's always something to look forward to on the weekends UwU
I believe this weekend, we'll try a virtual cafe date so we agreed to both go to Starbucks and show each other the shop difference. I mean, it's not much of a date but it is something and I have no complaints so far. It's already been 4 months and a lot has changed. For once, I'm getting into fights with a guy and before the day ends, the issue is resolved. He actually puts in more effort on me compared to the other people I've dated so now I'm waiting to see if we can see each other by the Ber months. Because that's his target time but I think he's just trying to get it as close to my birthday as possible.
This is all from me today UwU
I really need to start drafting articles. Hopefully tomorrow night, I can start on that ;;-;;
The dilemma with minting
Hello hello again! I’m back and for today… Well, I’m just gonna ponder on my mining dilemma because January has ended yet I’ve minted nothing from my digital artworks for this month. AS to why… it has something to do with the development of the NFT markets in the smartBCH network.
As of now, there’s oasis.cash spice NFTs and soon, a few other NFT markets. None of these can make minting for non-technical folks like me, possible. If I were to hope to mint, I would have to create my own minting site just for that puropse. I’d also have to get in contact with some developers (which are pretty scary, based on the last time I talked to one XD ) for help.
If that’s the case, why don’t I continue minting on jungle? Well, I’m also in a fix on that one. For one, jungle now lacks the audience to make it a sustainable market for NFTs . I think, since the SmartBCH developed its own marketplace, people mostly prioritize those NFTs probably because airdrops is easier, and so is the circulation.
Another issue I have is regarding the uniqueness of the piece and the rarity. As I’ve been seeing on my NFT studies, Rarity is everything and in some markets, they make sure that you aren’t in any other NFT Market to assure that they’re the only network that has these assets. This is also a reason why I haven’t been minting. Because if the case that jungle has no plans to bridge the site to SmartBCH, I have to stock up to create a sizeable number if pieces in the case that I move to a different market place.
If you’re gonna ask me why I don’t expand to a different market… well, I’m considering it, but I am not sure which market to venture into. I’ve been hoping to find a more sustainable market where my work will be valued.
I don’t go into atomic.hub because the NFTs there just lack the quality. Opensea would have been okay but then, for a rookie and traditional artist like me, I would easily be overshadowed with AI generated pixel art that may or may not be used for money laundering. Rarible ould have been nice if only the transaction fees weren’t so insanely high.
I would appreciate suggestions though. And if anybody has an idea on how to mint on the SmartBCH network without requiring me to learn rows and rows of codes ;;-;; I don’t think I even have the brain to take up that much information anymore.
This is mostly what’s on the forefront of my thoughts these days. So it all boils down to whether I should continue to mint in jungle or not. Hopefully, one of these days, I cn get over with this dilemma. In those cases, maybe jungle decided to make a bridge to smartBCH or I learn how to mint on the SBCH network. Whatever comes first, I guess.
Okay, this ends the ramblings of a frustrated artist that’s kind of broke and kind of struggling to understand the quick pace of the SBCH network, cuz I swear, whenever I check on the network again, there’s always a new coin and there’s always a new activity and I’m just… trying to cope up :”( but I have work and it’s getting increasingly harder to absorb things on SBCH while familiarizing myself with analysis methods. I’ll save that for another day though. Thank you for reading my random ramblings XD
I greatly appreciate it! I would also appreciated any suggestion for my dilemma
My 60 day art challenge so far
Hello hello and I’m back! I know I went missing again but I blame work for my exhaustion. I did attempt to write but having to stay in the oven room plus running up and down the laboratory stairs in metal sole shoes can tire someone out. I mean, I’m not complaining since I’ve been wanting to work again for so long now, but my body is still adjusting and so is my sleeping habit and the other activities I have on my plate. I’ve been making tie to draw digitally again though, which is noce because it’s kind of distracting me from my work stress. (Yes, 2 weeks in and I’m already stressed with how I’ll manage my work load)
I think the last time I updated on my art mini book was a month ago, or so says the time stamp of my last art article: **https://read.cash/@Hanzell/i-finally-have-work-art-update-40cc1663**
You can check my day 1 to… I think, day 6 progress here + a few digital arts I’ve worked on for the duration of that month.
Anyways, I just wanted to upload that here
Day 7 (New York street on a winter night) and day 8 (Inside a cozy cafe shop)
I actually had to change the prompt a bit for this one because (1) I have no idea what a new york street looks like and (2) I’m struggling to draw interiors so these ones aren’t prompt accurate. I still enjoyed painting these though. Maybe one day I’ll try painting places on the spot as practice for this
Day 9 (bones) and day 10 (multiple potions smoking)
Funny thing with these pieces though is that I drew them on new year’s eve because I was already fully aware that I coudn’t join in the jumping and the noise because of my dogs. At least these pieces came out nice and they were a good start to my art activity for the year.
Day 11 (hay field) and day 12 (fantasy tree house)
I also made this during new year day since new year day will always be a lazy day and a day to say thanks while also hoping for the better.
Day 13 (a cute plush toy of an ancient terror) and day 14 (smelly sneakers)
The plushie is actually cthulu. I’ve been dying to read the tales of cthulu, sadly, I don’t have the funds to buy the book yet and I’m trying to see if I’ll have time to read, especially with work. Also for the smelly sneakers… I wasn’t sure how I’ll draw that but I figured… nothing is smellier than wet shoes so I think that counts as smelly shoes.
Day 15 (fireflies in between trees) and day 16 (fishing docks in the fog)
Couldn’t help myself XD I went solid ink with both. And my tree doesn’t look like a tree much so I think I should consider buying a white ink marker that has a finer tip?
Day 17 (A dead tree) and day 18 (puppet cat)
These ones, I made at work during the 30 minute cooldown of my fertilizer sample for the sulfur content analysis. I mean, they look rushed to me because I just sketched them in a rush but to most people, it looks complete.
Day 19 (a post apocalyptic abandoned farm) and day 20 (playground)
Something I only got to accomplish today because I feel so behind ;;-;; my playground doesn’t look that good though.
Day 21 (war hammer) and day 22 (a cup of hot chocolate)
I actually have no idea ow to draw a war hammer? The only war hammer I know is thor’s mjolnir so I googled it up and it basically looked like a giant meat tenderizer so I went with that
Day 22 (an alchemist’s lab) and day 24 (a lush misty forest)
I haven’t finished day 23 yet because it has so may layers ;;-;; but I enjoyed making day 24 because I just went with ink dilution and watching the ink bleed down from the paper is so satisfying
That’s my watercolor progress so far. Personal comment on my work… I think I use the white gel pen way too much. And I think I still need to work on my blending and detailing. It’s improving though? I think?
Digitally... I don't have many digital works these days because I'm struggling to look at a computer screen for so long again. I think this is because I don't use a computer much at work. I mostly just use a PC for an hour a day at most now. Let's see if I can make anything digital tomorrow.
If you want to see the WIP though, just look me up on noise.cash: **https://noise.cash/u/Hanzell**
We could have been
And so, I've finally finished my hanahaki boy and I've given him a little story to add to this sad lore
“Hello, are you Samuel?” A teary-eyed woman approached him as he peeked through his friend’s casket.
He looked to the woman and gave a small, confused nod in return. “That’s me,” He said solemnly and turned to face her.
“You were Anthony’s friend. There was a letter we found in his belongings addressed to you” Carefully, she handed him the letter and nodded in thanks before tucking it into his coat pocket. He would save that for later.
He lingered a bit longer at his friend’s wake. They were asking him to explain how he found Anthony in his dorm room and it pained him to constantly relive that memory of his friend over and over again. When the people who visited thinned out, he took it as his cue to take his leave as well.
On his way back to the university, the letter which he kept in his coat pocket fell out as he was reaching for a handkerchief.
“It looked like you had so much to say to me to write it all in a letter” There was no amusement in his tone, everything just sounded flat to him. Despite his depleting energy, he still tore open the envelope and scanned through the letter his dear friend left him.
*Dear Sam,*
*It must be weird receiving a letter from someone not from here but I wanted you to read this letter and to understand why I had to take a leave from university. So here it goes.*
*The old folks in the town i grew up in used to say that love is a dangerous thing when it was not reciprocated. It could drive people mad, and worse, it could drive one to their grave. Perhaps I was too young to understand the gravity of these words. Or perhaps the love people had was shallow. It always lingered deep in my thoughts. Why love someone you could never have?*
*Up until my teen years, I honestly pondered on the question of loving someone unattainable. How did such a thing happen? Wasn’t there a sort of soulmate assignment per person? My entire High school years passed with the thought constantly floating in my thoughts. A curiosity that will remain unanswered… Or so I thought.*
*It was until I started going to university that I could admit to feelings of attachment. But with the same gender… was this allowed? Nevertheless, I gave in to my urges and tried to get as close to the man as possible. It wasn’t even such a hard task. You were friendly enough and my offer of friendship was welcomed with open arms. Soon enough, you became a constant fixture in my university days.*
*It was also during this time that I felt like there was something strange growing in me. I was pretty sure it was my feelings for you, but when I came home over the break and my grandmother said something felt strange about me, I knew I was in trouble. When I started coughing out petals, that was what confirmed it.*
*I still came back to uni after break ended for the chance of seeing you. I didn’t know my condition would become that bad. I didn’t think diseases from my village’s lore ever came true but I would laugh at my younger self now for not having believed. I would laugh at myself for loving someone I could never have. It’s unfortunate that you have to find out this way but the person I can’t have is you.*
*P.s. Apparently in the lore, if I confessed to you, and you reciprocated my feelings, this could go away. But I don’t think it would ever be. I’ll accept my fate.*
*All the best,*
*Anthony*
After having read through the letter, frustration bubbled up deep inside of him. So it was all because of him?
“You idiot! You dumb country bumpkin!” He shouted at the top of his lungs as he clutched onto the letter for dear life “If you just told me sooner!” Tears started streaming down his cheeks as he once again relived Anthony’s last moments in his dorm room. How Anthony smiled at him when he saw him rushing into the room. And how Anthony’s barely audible voice sounded when he said “we could have been if I was courageous enough”
Anthony had to fight back the urge to gag as he remembered his friend surrounded by bloodied flowers that seemed to have been feeding off of the man. In the end, Anthony was gone, and nothing he will do would ever bring him back.
“We could have been if I was courageous enough to ask too”
What a week
Oh what a week this one has been. I've never felt this tired before, actually. But then again... It's been a full year since I actually got a job and actually step foot in a laboratory.
So now I'm just gonna give you a quick rundown of my week and I think this might become a regular thing since I never run out of activities in this lab ;;-;; and it uses so much of my stamina.
Let's start off with trainings. This week has been nothing but training for both virtual and in the lab. In the past week, I've been bombarded with safety training that I might qualify for a safety officer 1 position if I just took the certification exam. But no way will I take another exam.
Sadly, I can't paint while doing the trainings since my supervisor checks in on me every now and then, to make sure I'm listening promptly to the trainer. At home though... I could paint while training :"( oh how I miss drawing already.
The training I looked forward to was the instrumentation training I've been receiving from my supervisor. I'm pleased to say that like in my previous work, all my samples explode ☺️☺️☺️ and I'm no stranger to explosions and the math needed for it. So it's fun to me
Here is just a fraction of the instruments we handle and the things I need to learn how to operate. There's a bomb calorimeter, a sulfur analyser, and a flash heat furnace. But we also have an elemental analyser, furnaces, ovens, and spectroscopic instruments like the atomic absorption spectroscopy powered by hallow-cathode lamps and inductively coupled plasma. I've never used any of those instruments before so my supervisor and team mates basically have their hands full with all the questions I have for each instrument.
Sanitation. I'm not sure if I've already mentioned this anywhere but we're strict with sanitation since we are a laboratory and contaminations could ruin us. In light of that, we constantly hear "is this clean?" And if nobody answers, it goes straight to the sink anyways. There's also people sanitation because we have a set of work clothes we change in and out of whenever the shift starts and ends. We're minimising dirt that comes from the "outside world"as everyone here seriously calls it (so now I'm not the only one who calls anywhere outside "the outside world" and it's amusing because I feel normal here). It's good practice but I feel like I'm creating so much laundry.
Work clothes get sanitized after the shift so it's clean the next day but outside clothes also gets sanitized because my clothes always comes back to me smelling like detergent (yes, we have to surrender our clothes to the sanitation department). And they're pretty strict on social distancing because our food hall looks like a hospital ward with all the blue curtains that separates us. You also have to make sure to close the curtain when you're occupying a table. It's kind of sad to eat alone in total isolation but I get that it's for safety purposes too so I'll have to live with it for now.
Also, we have a bus that drives us to and from the office to make sure that we don't get outside exposure. Kind of makes me feel like a high risk patient but I guess this will be infinitely better than riding the police car just to buy ammonia because that experience was embarrassing- and I never want to experience it again.
Over this weekend though, I'll do my best to reorganize my closet to find work fitting clothes despite house renovations.
The entire house is getting renovated and it smells like paint everywhere. I'm kind of worried it'll make my sisters infertile but they wanted to paint the house ;;-;; and I got dragged into it. Well, I'm not painting my room yet because they just rebuilt my rotting old ceiling so maybe I'll do that next week. When I can buy my own paint ;;-;; cuz they only have white and I want my room with color since my entire workplace is white. I might go crazy if the house is as white as the lab ;;-;;
This is all from me ☺️ I'm still trying to do a bit of clean up from all the mess this house renovation day made
My gallery? It's messy 😅
Ahh yes, the rare times I join read.cash trends 😅😅😅 Still, I appreciate @curiouscat for the little trend invite. It was nice of you to 😊
I usually have no shame in disclosing my gallery content since I barely have anything in here. It's mostly doggo, things I see then food? But yeah, I'm joining the trend because this child doesn't want to think much right now. Too tired from work yet it's only my 3rd day. So for now, let's see what's inside my messy af gallery
Oldest photo in my phone
Uhh... I don't think you guys would enjoy seeing this but it's actually a bottle of embalmed bats from my old University's biology lab. As to why I took a photo of it, I honestly don't remember but this one is dated August 29, 2018. If I remember correctly, we still had microbiology classes back then and we occupied one of the biology labs for the lecture since our class size was so small
Latest photo in my phone
So this is my most recent shot OwO
It's me in my company lab gown! Yes! I was in the changing room next to the pantry when I took this and I am honestly proud that I've finally gotten back into the lab.
A little bonus because this is what my department's instrument room looks like. There's more instruments at the back of this room but this room is specific for coal samples
A photo I have no idea what it's about?
As the image caption implies. I have no idea why I took this photo. Probably for aesthetic purposes but my cam couldn't keep up at that time. Or maybe I had a good concept idea for it but I forgot in the end. Either way, it just sits in my gallery
The worst photo
I can't tell if this is my worst shot since I took it from a moving car so the quality is horrible
Or this because my sister took it while I was sleeping and my embarrassing froggo mask has come to light.
A selfie/groupie
I have cute selfie with the new dog 😅 he loves me way too much and these days, he's gotten strong enough to actually knock me over when he jumps at me. I have no idea what he does when I'm at work now but boy, is he strong now-
I also have a groupie UwU because both selfie and groupie is so rare to me 😅😅😅 I don't like being included in photos that much 😅 I'm this kind of camera shy and it's getting worse as I get older 😂
The best photo
I'd still say this is the best because look at baby Chappo 💕💕💕 he looks so happy here!! Well, he is a happy boy but he's happier when he can go for road trips. It's one of the things he lives for besides tug of war
A photo of food that I want to eat again
I don't want anything fancy, actually 😅😅😅 I just really want nilupak because the one the vendor here sells has ube halaya (nilupak and halaya are both root crop based desserts/sweets here) and I love the combination of both. Sadly, I rarely see the vendor now so it's been a while since I last had this
A place that I want to visit again
Without a doubt, I would love to go to the harbor again and watch the sunset there. It was my stress reliever back in my Uni days and I think even when I'm working, it'll be one of the places I'd love to go back to for both the memories and for the much needed relaxation
A photo of someone I admire
Lol we don't have a photo together but this is my fling of 4 months and I think after his graduation, he's flying over here to actually court me? Not sure if we'll even get to that point but I admire the man because he's actually trying and he has a plan in life that he's actually trying to execute unlike with both guys I've met so yeah, this dude is who I currently admire
Beach/resort/getaway photo?
Well, here's me on a getaway at least 😅😅😅 my very last minute Christmas getaway with my best friend. I don't think we can even do that travel on a monthly basis because of how busy we are now ;;-;; I'm still hoping we at least get to travel a few times this year. Maybe go back to this beach in dingalan, aurora
Funniest photo
... My best friend got me this during boards review for my "single self" and I honestly have no idea where I put this but I still think it's funny at that she found something like this in a toy store. I can't with her sometimes 😂😂😂 but hey, I get her weird stuff all the time too
My most memorable photo
This is still the most memorable photo I have, and in the good way UwU because my best friend got me this watch as a Christmas gift and I've been using it in the lab since I started working. I'm trying to find a way to sew in a little chest pocket into my lab gown just so it has a compartment but for now, it can stay in my pants pocket
That has been a few photos from my gallery and I hope you found my take on this gallery raid amusing as well
Cure me
**[WP] You're slowly transforming into a monster and are racing to find a way to reverse it before your mind goes feral.**
“And we have another incident of a salmonella outbreak here in….”
The sound of the television faded as I turned to look at my newest quantum dot synthesis. This thing was going to change the world! It was going to be the first patented antimicrobial agent that these pesky germs will never grow immune to. I was proud of myself, after years of looking into a good carbon source, I finally found the best precursor for the job. What better way to ensure that it’s safe for living things?
I pondered on that for a while and then the idea hit me! Why not use living things! The idea excited me. No need for adding other agents just to activate the quantum dots. A living being would have everything I would need for this. Sulfur, Phosphorus, Nitrogen, it would all be there!
I started out small with this project, I started with plants. It looked like a good idea at that time but it still needed more. I moved on to insects. Small creatures that would hardly be missed by anybody. As the insects I used got bigger and more complex, so did the efficiency of the synthesis. I was convinced when I tried to use a mouse for my synthesis, that it would be more effective. So I continued down this path.
October 19, XXXX
30th day of documenting the quantum dots made from mouse flesh. I’ve tried applying the quantum dots on other rats I’ve wounded intentionally. After 30 days of treatment, there seemed to be nothing wrong with the specimens so the next step… was to try it on humans… try it on me.
It was a dangerous idea, I know. But it was all for the sake of science!
This will be a new set of data to record and monitor.
November 14, XXXX
25 days since I’ve started treating an intentional cut with the quantum dots. It’s non-toxic so far so I believe it incorporates in the body since the material is also carbon-based. My appetite has greatly changed recently as I’ve mentioned in my previous entries. I do think I might be delusional but the shape of my toes and fingers have been changing. I fear I might be spending too much time around rats.
November 28, XXXX
I’ve… been hearing… things- And I’ve been growing more animalistic by the day. Is this the effect of the quantum dots??? I was not delusional, my extremities have greatly changed, so has my bone structure and my body hair. I might be becoming a rat.
December 17, XXXX
I can barely retain thought. I went outside, trying to find more materials on a possible way to reverse this but the changes that already happened to my face terrifies people. I can no longer go outside.
January 10, XXXX
Strange people are outside- Have they come to help? Will they let me use their bodies to make more quantum dots that will turn me human again? My condition has worsened and it’s been hard to stay sane.
*****
Slowly, the enforcer pushed the door open and a flash of light poured into the room, making the professor hiss from his spot.
“Professor Smith, we’ve been getting reports of infes–” The man cowering in the corner suddenly pounced on the enforcer holding up the flashlight. Following him was a swarm of rats that have come to acknowledge him as one of their own.
“Cure! Cure! You are the cure!” The Professor laughed like a mad man as his claws lodged into the enforcer’s neck. Deep red liquid soon gushed from the man as the professor drove his claws deeper into the man’s flesh “You see this, lovelies? Looks like we can experiment again”
A crazed grin spread across the Professor’s face as he dragged the still bleeding body into his laboratory.
And so, I apologize for this somewhat shitty prompt. I’ve been busy with work orientations and trainings ;;-;; and tomorrow, I’ll be traveling across 2 different dimensions for 2 different agendas. Gosh, etting work requirements is so expensive ;;-;;
“Friends” and politics
So elections are coming up here and political talks have been increasingly good conversation starters and an increasingly good way to start a fight XD
This idea came about yesterday when I was talking to a high school “Friend” Who I recently started talking to again. So just a quick background, we were friends in high school up until my 3rd year in college, but since I was being given a mini-thesis every semester, I couldn’t make time for her and thus, she declared our friendship, over. I did try when I was free, but unlike her who only had 4 classes a week, my classes ran from Monday to Saturday so you can see why I barely had time. Plus my schedule was usually from 7 am till 9 pm and those were not by choice. It was a matter of staff availability plus all the free time I had was spent on the research papers assigned to me.
So It has been 5 years of no contact and when my board results came out and I posted that I passed, that was when she started talking to me again. For what reason, I’m not so sure, nor do I bother asking anymore.
On one occasion, she asked who I would vote for in the incoming elections and I told her I wasn’t planning to vote because I am apolitical. With that, her lecture began and I’ve had that lecture before. I understand the consequences of what my political stand is but she should understand my reasons too.
Nobody seems like a suitable candidate for me, and I don’t think there will be one. Not in this country who bases on popularity and how well they can get the votes of the “poor”/low-income households. I say this because That economic group is easily swayed with needs. If they choose to focus on the middle-class people, though, that would be a game-changer.
No, I’m not anti-poor, but if you look at it, a majority of actual taxpayers come from middle-class families, whereas low-income families barely pay their taxes unless they worked, but that only covers a minimal part of it. There’s also the fact that if you focus too much on these “poor” people, you teach them to be overly reliant on provisions given by the government. How many people from this economic group actually pay for their cedula? That's one form of tax but you won't see them lining up for it unless their job requires them too.
I mean, it’s good that the government prioritizes those in need but then the middle class can also fall into need yet because of the logic that they can actually afford their needs, it’s often a basis for not being qualified for grants and provisions and it’s pretty stupid. Are the middle-class, not part of the population now? Or are they really just focusing on those people they can buy votes from? There is no progression and no sustainability when focusing on this economic group unless you give them jobs or scholarships. That would be a better kind of help that would also help the country too, not just a one-time thing of relief goods and financial aid during a crisis.
There’s news of the recent hacking of the ballot-counting machines. It scares me because if I choose to vote, what are the chances that they would use my ballot count to cheat their wanted candidate into position? If I don’t vote though, I’d also be at fault because it may contribute to the country’s worsening conditions. I understand this well enough but then what would you prefer? Have your vote cheated or contributing to the downfall?
There are not enough actual professionals in our government. I envy countries like Canada and Japan whose government Agencies are headed by actual professionals who are active in their professions still. While here, you just get people based on how popular they are. Yes, that’s how democracy works, and it’s good that this generation is actually doing their research on their candidates now, but on this point, I’m not focusing on presidential nominees but the staff that needs to head the different government agencies. Will the presidential candidate even assign active professionals? It seems this country only knows lawyers as the only professionals qualified to run the country. Will they finally allow doctors in practice to head the Department of health? Or actual Scientists to head the Department of Science and Technology? Unless they make this happen, I still have no intentions of joining any political affairs.
After I elaborated on my points, my friend just left me on seen and she really hasn’t answered me since. I do love this country but how the old-fashioned government handles it is something I’m not amused with.
I apologize for this rant but I got irritated that she would get mad at me (again) just because of how different my views are now. I had sent her more points on this but I don’t want to make an extremely long rant so this is enough for now.
Poison
So I’m gonna attempt to write something while I have the energy for it XD let’s hope that it will come out as good as the vibes this line/ prompt idea gave me. Also, pardon me for the depressing prompt, It seems like this is my brain's default setting XD
[WP] “You know, they say alcohol is a poison” “Then why do you keep drinking it?” “Because there are some parts of me that I need to kill”
I remember back when I was younger, I would always see my grandfather with a whiskey flask wherever he went. When I asked my father, he said it was an adult juice that kept pop’s body warm and that he’s been like that since the war ended. I never believed that those were the only reasons someone would carry a flask around but for a 5-year-old kid, I thought those explanations were enough.
I asked again when I turned 10 because my father had started drinking the juice regularly as well. He started when my mom passed away. I later discovered that the adult juice my father described was called alcohol. It made him cry a lot and at times, it put him to sleep. Since then, pop’s visited more often and he and my father would often stay up too late, just drinking their alcohol while talking, sometimes crying, sometimes shouting.
One night, I was woken up by a thud from downstairs. I didn’t even think twice to get out of bed. It was either someone dropped something or someone fell and I knew they’d need help. When I got down, what I saw was my father, sleeping on the floor and pop’s was now covering him with a blanket. Pop’s then stood up straight and ushered me to the front porch to get some air. I had no objection, the cold wind would put me back to sleep was what I thought.
“You know, your dad is lucky that you look after him so well,” He said bluntly, his voice getting a little hoarse from the cold yet that didn’t stop him from lighting a cigarette.
“Isn’t that normal though? He’s my dad,” I was confused, And for a while, I just stared at Pop’s back that looked increasingly lonely as he exhaled a few puffs of smoke.
“That boy never did care for me when I came back from the war” A soft hum escaped him as he reached for his whiskey flask this time “His mum made him believe all sorts of rubbish”
“He said you started drinking when you came back from war. Why was that?”
He paused just as the opening of the flask was about to touch his lips “I had my reasons, Correon” He muttered more to himself before he took a large gulp from his flask, “Maybe I was trying to see if alcohol really was a poison, like what them folks say” A cheeky grin broke across his face as he was capping the flask again.
“Then why do you keep drinking it?” I looked up at him with concern and I could see that his facade won’t work this time.
“Because there are some parts of me that I need to kill” His voice grew solemn and for a while, we stayed in silence. I busied myself trying to understand what he meant while he finished off his cigarette. Once he exhaled his last puff of smoke, he gestured me back to my room to sleep more.
The words never left me though. I only knew what it meant when I was in the same shoes as them. When I had lost both of them at the age of 19, I finally understood that it was both body and memory they were trying to kill. So I hope they wait for me a little longer.
@Hanzell
