January 15, 2022

I woke up late this morning and realized that I have work. It is Saturday and I have an overtime work. I have lots to do. Before I get up on my bed, I check on my cellphone and read a Webtoon called 7Fates Chakho. It is a webtoon created by Hybe and who are the main characters? Of course, BTS. This is the first time again, for so many years, I found myself reading a webtoon. I read Manga and webtoon before but for the sake of drawing. I draw them and I draw before. I do caricature and sketches of cartoons. My drawing notepad just worn out because I stop doing that.

After a while, after taking a bath, my hands are automatic opening Tiktok App and of course, my timeline are all BTS. I have been watching all Tiktok contents of BTS since I had Tiktok apps. Tiktok app is really helpful to relieve my stress plus the learning are massive. There are lots of people posting very useful stuffs and there are lots of funny weird people and lost also, lol.

Moving on to the topic, have you ever been told by someone these lines " Thanks for being born!" Regardless of the tone of voice, the message is touching. When I heard someone told me that yesterday, it brings me back to my memories at school and I want to share it to you guys.

In middle school, on my second year, I was transferred to section A. The highest section in the school is Section A. During my first year, I was on Section B. There were few from the old classmate that was transferred to section A when we became second year high school. Because of that, I only have few friends. My former classmate sits too far from me. I am very new to the feeling that I look stranger to my seatmates and vice versa.

Then the school crawls like 3 months. I begin having friends. My seatmates are my friends and there is this one guy classmate, which seats very far from me but I can always catch a glimpse on him that he is looking at me. I can feel that someone is looking at me from a far and I wonder why i feel it. He doesn't talks to me. He is not the silent type but he is not that friendly to girls.

One day, my seatmate told me that she received a letter from D. Let's call him Letter D. It is his name initial. D, the boy, gave him a letter, but the letter is not for her but for me. She read it by mistake because she thought it was for her. She gave me the letter and I went straight to girl's room to read it. It was a love letter. D is confessing that he likes me. The end line of the letter says "Thanks for being born".

My initial reaction was, I got scared. I was 14 then and I don't know what to do with that. I was not even a teen because I still have no menstruation that time but it was the same year that I started my period. It seems that the letter is just a letter of proposing so I didn't reply to the letter.

One day, while we were going home, I was near the gate and when I passed by the gate, he was there. He was looking at me and seems talking to me in the eye. I was with my seatmate that time, the one who read the letter first and she hold my hand. I was sweating and I felt cold air around me because I was too scared. I didn't like him. We are not even friends but the look on his eyes are telling me exactly that he is in love with me. As we walked by the street, my seatmate said he is following us so instead of walking, we had a jeepney ride. The rest is history. A love is not pursue between us. My mind is too young for my age, I don't want to get involved romantically with everyone.

Fast forward to college. It was my last year that I met someone that made me say "Thanks for being born". He is the person that makes me automatically happy. I loved the feeling of being happy everyday and looking forward to waking up and be alive for 24 hours because if I am lucky, I will able to see him around me at school. Sometimes I don't see him, but it is enough for me to wait until I see him again. It was a one-sided love and again not pursue but I am still saying thanks that he was born in this lifetime because for a couple of years my world revolved around him, until the love just fades away.

At present, my "Thanks for being Born" message is for BTS or Bangtan Seonyondan. They are my stress reliever. They give me good and hard times. Good when I found out about their success and when they are grateful to Armys. Bad when there is something that makes me jealous and envy, yet everything is unintentional. They are the ones that I am looking forward of seeing one day. I am always praying that one day, the day will comes that we will see eye to eye. Maybe in another lifetime we will meet as a regular person, but I cherish every moment watching and supporting them. Now, I don't imagine my life without them. They are the best part of my life right now.

What is your "Thanks for Being Born" Moment?

I want to say Thanks for being born to my sponsor. If they are not born, we will never meet and no one will have the initiative support for my articles. Thanks for my amazing sponsors!

Images from Unsplash and from Random picture post from Pinterest.