May 21, 2022

Recently, I am feeling partially down due to some episode of anxiety, sadness and the content I am attracting at Tiktok. Of course there are still BTS content included but the recent deaths of my favorite Tiktokerist, the anxiety content and the real story of some individuals having stress is eating me all up. I feel down but I am trying not to really absorb all of this. I had done some recollection about myself and what I am doing with myself. I even got to the point that one day God will appear in my sleep and ask me, "What did you do to the life I lend to you?" and surely I will answer, "I worked hard God, I am busy all the time. I spend the money from my salary for my family, pets and friends, I also buy BTS Merchandise because it gives me 5 seconds of happiness whenever I am unboxing it." For sure it will be a good slapping after.

Seriously, we will be ask about it one day? What would be your answer?

I came to an assessment that I need to SERIOUSLY TAKE CARE OF MYSELF before my life will take its toll. I don't want future problems about my health. I am seeing myself being happy even at the age of 60. I might not be getting married but I know I will be spending my life with my nieces and nephew from my sister and my brother's off springs. Obviously, I want to live long. I want to live long even though I know that the future will be very hard for everyone because of the natural calamities and problems about money. See? See how negative I am?

I will call this Choosing Myself Plan.

Since it is just a plan, this is prone to some adjustments in the future. Choosing Myself Plan consists of activities that I need to follow for my everyday living. I have some on my list already but I don't have the official list. I am still recollecting. I am excited for this one, yet the only problem is that, once I write it on my notes, it will never happen, but, since I need to strictly make it happen, I will push myself. I am not getting younger and not getting healthier so I must do this. Also, this is for my mental health so.....Fighting!!

List of activities

Exercising 3 to 4 times a week. I am doing this one and I do it for 30 minutes for an hour. I even include dancing as part of the exercise. My goal is to get a good perspiration because it is good for my heart and my skin. Whenever I am regularly exercising, I don't get pimple. My skin looks soft and hydrated after and even when I wake up in the morning.

Sleeping for 6 hours. Sleeping for 6 hours is all I can do as I have daytime work and night shift work every week days. I already arranged a working time during my night shift and I will only work for 5 hours, not 8 hours. Some of the work that I will not be finished will be done during week days, so I will be working during Saturday and Sunday. I don't know how long I will be working. It looks like I will be working almost everyday but this time, I don't have night shift during Saturday and Sunday.

Taking vitamins is a must. I have vitamin C, collagen and ferrous sulfate. I even have celery powder and taking Lactobacillus tablet for my digestion and to have healthy bacteria added. I made a research and these are all important for our health when we are growing old.

Drinking water is a must. I will always remember to drink water. I am not the kind who always drink water, that is why I do exercise because it pushes me to feel thirsty and replace the water I lost. Drinking water can help in losing weight too. It also washes some of our organs when we drink during the morning. It even add oxygen intake. It is a must have for everyone of us especially if you are prone to pain.

10% from my salary is for my new clothes. I am very comfortable with the type of clothes I am wearing everyday. I have my company uniform that I wear from Monday to Thursday but it seems that some of my office mates are not wearing theirs, so I guess I will do the same. New clothes, that fits you and look good on you adds to expressing how you show yourself. It even show how much you love yourself if you look good. I rather give part of my salary for new clothes! Because of this, my savings will be lesser but its okay, I can still have savings.

I will use my vacation leave. I have vacation and sick leave on my night shift job. I have 38 leaves combined now. I will use my vacation leave of 19 credits during Saturday and Sunday instead of working that days. Sick leave is convertible to cash at the end of the year so I always maintain to be healthy, anyways, Vacation leave is convertible to cash too that is why I don't use them and add the conversion to my savings. This time it will change. I need to rest so I need to use my vacation leave.

10% from my salary is for my art craft. I remember I do some sketches before and it doesn't have a color. I was doing some painting before too. I even painted Namjoon of BTS. Whenever I paint, that is the time I am thinking deeper. It also helps in refreshing my brain and it is my best outlet before. I miss doing that. I need to start doing that now. This gives me some internal happiness. If I am happy, it means I am taking myself good. I will just find schedule to do it.

This Choosing Myself Plan is subject for revision. I will add more in my future post. For now, this is on my priority list and little by little I add some changes if I happen to do all of it.

Images: lead image edited by me, Namjoon painting is mine, others from Unsplash